DS7 is worried about everything.

[Christmascardsontheshelf]

The moon crashing into the earth, sea levels rising floods, tornados, tsunamis, dying, someone else dying, ghosts, kidnappers, car crashes.
All day every day he cries at least 5 times a day about something.
He finds it hard getting to sleep and gets up, comes into my bed most nights but he can't come alone because he is worried about siblings so I currently sleep every night with all 3 in the bed.
DH is pissed off and retreated to their room.
I am stressed and worried for him.

He fixated on things and If he sees a video or hears a story about, I don't know, a plane crash, like 9/11 he will go on the computer at school and search and search plane crashes. He can name 6+ plane crashes and give lots of detail. Tells everyone about them all. Wants to watch films about them, wat hed YouTube videos about them.

I don't know what to do he is so anxious and so sensitive. I am handling it badly but he cries and talks about this stuff none stop. He spent 2 hours looking at the moon because he thought it was coming closer getting so hysterical. What do I do?

Just read through thank you all,
He is up again with a tummy ache. wants to call Dr just incase he doesn't wake up.

Homeschooling really isn't an option and neither is private therapy.

Will try worry box.

Eco worries were a massive thing, but we can work through that by trying to reduce waste, charity shops, growing plants etc. I can't do anything about the moon though

We had a few weeks of none stop worrying about a ghost story someone told him at school. He looked it up on the Internet and I tried to show him its not true but he just had this 'just incase' mentality.

I was similar as a child at night I couldn't sleep a wink but the day was fine. Its bleeding from night time worries to all the time worries.

Not really sure how to get away from the Internet though. School, friends, family, the TV and my phone and DH phone. We don't let him on our phones but he's cracked the passwords and the TV is a smart TV so co enter to YouTube. You can't turn it off and its not like a porn filter. There are no filters for planes. I change password, hide remotes but its not easy as there is only a limited number of places to put them.

Its been quite a while. DH is not helpful at all and just tells him off but that does no good for their relationship or for DS. Just makes things worse
I have snapped at him too, too many times. I do apologise but you can only day the moons not crashing 400 times before you snap. especially with other children and life to deal with. I feel so terrible but it really is wearing.

I'm moaning.

What is play therapy? DS had a big thing about tsunamis and we played tsunami by building a city and he smashed it with the blue blocks. that lasted a few days and made it fun. Easier to deal with though as we are no where near a sea.
planes overhead every 5 minutes here.

If you google for a kids charity and they offer counselling it’s often low cost or even free

Constant reassurance actually isn't helpful as it just reinforces the validity of the fear. It's really hard. The actual thoughts and worries aren't the issues, it's the anxiety behind them. There was another thread on MN earlier with an older child and some really helpful advice. Will try to get the link

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/teenagers/4426946-Help-please-DD-extreme-intrusive-thoughts-psychiatrist-counsellor

www.pbslearningmedia.org/resource/ess05.sci.ess.eiu.moonorbit/why-doesnt-the-moon-fall-down/
Don't know if this helps OP?

Oh this sounds hard op! I agree that if you offer reassurance, for example if he’s worried about climate change, by you all focusing on recycling and counter actions you can take, this actually validated the fear for him and I could see that potentially showing him that trying to have your plan B ready will encourage him to always do the same! So maybe not the best step as he might try and prepare a ‘solution’ for every eventuality. The tsunami game would add to validating the worry for me. I would think showing him reassurance that bad things are very rare and that he is safe is the best option. Does he have any hobbies? Perhaps you could also just try and really fill his time with positive activities that he enjoys so he has less time to consider all the terrible things that may happen! With the moon for example perhaps you could learn about how long the moon has been there and how it’s a constant and some fascinating facts about it. Even that people have been there & come back! I would speak to the school about the internet access as I do think 7 is too young for freedom online. Can you get rid of YouTube at home for a few months. Give him a bit of a break! Is there something in particular that’s triggered this? Bad news or any event that’s made him feel insecure or vulnerable? Might be worth investigating the origin of his worry- to him these are logical reactions to help prepare for some bad event. Why is he so sure the bad event will happen? Sending you a hand hold, sounds tough xxx

You definitely need to stop the googling. It's easy to do because he's seven, so set some ground rules for when he's allowed to use the TV and what he's allowed to see. My seven year old doesn't Google things freely; if he wants to know about something we look it up together. He only watched kids' programmes that we've okayed, and isn't allowed to channel surf the adult channels. You'll need to speak to the school and get them to support you on this; I'm quite surprised he is free to roam the internet unsupervised at school anyway, this sounds like a massive safeguarding risk.

This was me as a child. I was terrified of terrorism (the IRA back then), Saddam Hussein, anything happening to my Mum, anything happening to me, dogs, car crashes, other kids, strange men, burglars, walking past homeless people, nuclear war, asteroids hitting the earth, the list goes on.

Those Crimestoppers ads they used to show in between programmes used to send me into a panicked frenzy looking at maps and asking my Mum to find out how far away it was.

As an adult, I was diagnosed as a highly sensitive person (lots online about that) and as having GAD. Try to get him some help as soon as you can, no one cared about kids' mental health back in the 80s/90s when I was dealing with it.

This was me as a child too. I had a lovely upbringing but I fixated on things: my sister had a friend who died of childhood cancer and I didn't speak for a fortnight after that, I saw a tiny bit of a Ruth Rendell Mystery - an arm with blood streaked down it - and woke nightly for about six months, I became obsessed with Chernobyl at one point and kept thinking I could hear the four minute warning.

I was recently diagnosed with autistic spectrum disorder. Nobody at school would have said I had anything 'wrong' with me other than being a bit fidgety in class and having a spiky profile in terms of what I was good at (what I enjoyed and was interested in) and what I was bad at (what I couldn't be arsed with, despite people telling me I needed to learn it).

My mum said I always needed 'quite careful management' - in a way my siblings didn't.

My son was similar.anxiety in children often gets worse when reach puberty so it's vital you put in support asap
If you need somewhere to vent or some understanding there's a parents and carers of anxious children/teens thread

The key we found was to acknowledge rather than dismiss the fear but make clear the likelihood of it happening was very, very remote. So whilst it is possible I guess that the moon might crash into the earth it has never happened so far. it is a very delicate balance but what you need to be very careful of is not feeding the fear.

At one stage ds2 was paranoid people could see him though the slightest crack in the bathroom window which meant he would refuse to have a bath. In desperation we blocked the window out completely with paper but in hindsight this just told him that there were people who could look in & didn't really help.

Doing a diary of behaviour may help you identify what is stressing him out. Is he worse on a school day for example or at the weekend. Help him feel safe in his environment - by giving him advance warning of changes - perhaps ask school to do this too. Think about whether he is missing social cues & instructions- neurotypical children's social skills change rapidly at this age and sometimes kids with social difficulties can find the world very confusing. It is definitely also worth asking school and your GP for help. It is not normal for a seven year old to be so worried about things and is a sign he is very stressed and needs additional support to reduce that stress.