AIBU to think he (or at least his tech) is too bloody loud?

[TwinkleTwinkleLittleStarFightr]

I am a quiet person. I am relatively quiet in my behaviour, and I enjoy peace and quiet around me.

DH used to be a quiet person but has become much louder in recent years.

DH is also very attached to his iPad. He sits on the sofa or carries it around with him watching YouTube videos or various streaming services.

To explain the level of noise - we have a reasonably sized 4 bedroom house, and he has his iPad volume so loud that when he has it on in the living room with the door closed, I can hear it clear as day in the bedroom upstairs, with the bedroom door also closed.

When we are in the same room, I literally jump at some of the louder bits of the videos.

He also “guffaws” at what he is watching. Think “Viking in the pub” levels of loud laughter. And he spends a LOT of time watching videos on it.

My AIBU:

YANBU - that is too loud. It’s unreasonable and antisocial.
YABU - there’s nothing wrong with being loud. You are too quiet and think everyone else should be too. Get over yourself.

(He is otherwise a lovely man - this is not a LTB thread )

Headphones needed.

Headphones x2

For him and his noisy shit

Noise cancelling headphones for you. So you don’t hear him bellowing at the iPad.

I’ve got a Viking in the pub
YANBU

He needs headphones!! Who watches a personal device without headphones?!

Yanbu for sure and even a little bit LTB (I'm so blessed to have a quiet DH lol)

Has he had his hearing tested, if this is something that's happened over time?

He needs headphones for sure. That would drive me insane!

Second investigation into hearing loss. Still annoying, but actually can't be helped

Hearing loss! Or earwax. If it's really that loud he'll have hearing loss soon enough either way

He won’t wear headphones. Or at least, he’ll only wear them when he brings the iPad to bed and I’m asleep.

I did wonder about hearing loss. I might insist he gets tested.

I like the idea of noise cancelling headphones for me! I hadn’t thought of that.

Or you do the same. Stoat about the house with a radio or your phone on loudly so it pisses him off. When he says can you not turn that down say only if you turn yours down. What’s sauce for the goose…

Talk to him every single time he uses it, ideal chit chat 😄. If he complains just tell him if he wears his headphones you will know not to chat to him.

@Dottybackorcid I like that idea! I’m not good at chit chat but could manage it for the cause.

You have to talk to him about it. He has to see that his desire to be constantly and loudly entertained 24/7 is rude, intrusive and, grant, fucking childish.

He can and should wear headphones.

I do as I like listening to music and DH doesn't need to just because I am. He might be reading, working or just doing nothing. So I bought a Bluetooth set and wear them round the house. Heavy things, weird, but it works for me and doesn't irritate him. If he wants to talk to me he flicks the room light on and off. Saves me jumping and possibly lashing out in fright - I caught his arm once, I used to be a kickboxer 🙄

Grant = frankly

Weird autocorrect!

Tell him straight out to turn it down or you'll take a hammer to it.
No need to sit him down, gently explain this and that or anything else.
Straight out turn it down or else.

I have talked to him about it. He will turn it down in the moment, but then turn it back up again once I have left the room - which still leaves it echoing around the house and effectively bars me from coming back into the room.

He says it’s no different to having the TV on (but he has that too loud too).

So he does act like a child then?

And if you wanted to use that room, turn the telly on?

I actually can't imagine sharing my home and life with someone so set on ignoring my feelings on anything, let alone noise levels.

I cant stand loud TV or devices! Why wont he wear headphones? I always use them myself when I’m on my iPad and my DP is watching TV etc. AirPods work great with an iPad, no reason why he can’t get some!

He has headphones, and he wears them if he is watching something in the bedroom and I am asleep, but he won’t wear them through the day because he doesn’t believe the noise is annoying.

If I wanted to watch something on TV he would put headphones on, but not just because I want peace and quiet.