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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To confront brother about his toxic relationships

2 replies

littlepieces · 20/12/2021 21:13

DP's youngest brother, 28 (who DP is very close to) has a really unhealthy idea of relationships. He gets intense very quickly and obsessed about women he starts seeing. Very old fashioned, Disney style romance type stuff and tons of slushy social posts after just a couple of weeks. He pays for absolutely everything for whoever he's dating, even though he's on an average salary and in debt. Some women have definitely clocked this and taken him for a ride money wise in recent years. What concerns me is that he tends to go for slightly troubled, timid women who he completely comandeers and treats like they're damsels in distress. Eg. Current girlfriend of two months has an eating disorder and is very shy and timid (a bit vulnerable I think). He is constantly talking down to her, telling her what to do, and wades into all normal day to day issues she runs into trying to be a hero. Past two relationships were exactly the same. It's weird.

DP is at a loss about what to do. His parents turn a blind eye and think this behaviour is fine if it makes their baby son happy. We see it as toxic. His relationships always end dramatically and with misogynistic accusations that his exes are 'psychos.' Any suggestions for how to maybe talk to him about improving his attitudes, or just let him get on with it?

OP posts:
Bluesarestillblue · 20/12/2021 21:21

I think you should mind your own business. But up to your partner to decide if he wants to discuss with his brother

littlepieces · 20/12/2021 21:45

I wouldn't say anything.. DP wants to, but doesn't know how to approach.

OP posts:
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