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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Who else was going to see family in France/ Germany and now can't go ?

19 replies

brokeneurotrash · 19/12/2021 12:03

Gutted, again not to be able to see my family for the second year running.

Anyone else ? When I signed up to live abroad, I never imagined the freedom to come and go as I please would just be taken away in a flash.

It really sucks !

First world problems, I guess.

Anyone else in the same boat AGAIN ?

OP posts:

workwoes123 · 19/12/2021 12:39

The opposite way round but yes. We are Scottish, living in France. Our flights back to the UK were cancelled last year. this year we technically could go but the testing (4 times each!) plus the quarantine plus the risk of getting covid / positive test and having to miss our flight back / isolate with elderly grandparents... it just became more stress than it is worth, so we have cancelled.

We used to live in NZ and we moved to France as - in theory - it was right next door to our parents in the UK. Between Brexit and Covid, living abroad really isn't panning out as we expected.

Courage, what goes up will come back down.

Original poster

brokeneurotrash · 19/12/2021 12:46

Sorry to hear it. Maybe next year we can go. That's what I said last year.

OP posts:

SweetLathyrus · 19/12/2021 13:22

It's now two years since I've seen my parents, who live in France. I know there have been windows to do it, but between work and other life circumstances, that just didn't work out :(

Shedmistress · 19/12/2021 13:24

My OH has just got through security to come back to France after his dad's funeral. Apparently it was extremely difficult to get through.

I hope he makes it onto that plane.

Dizzyhedgehog · 19/12/2021 13:41

We haven't been home in two years. DS5 hasn't seen his grandparents in real life during that time, either.
We were meant to drive to the UK next Wednesday. Everything booked and prepped for ages, all the sodding paperwork ready. We are both vaccinated, had our boosters a month ago and DS is scheduled to get his in January. We have PCR tests booked both for here and for the UK, which I now need to cancel. We had timed it so DS could finish his mandatory quarantine on our return before the end of the school holidays.
When the French closed things down, we managed to change our bookings to go from Holland. Now Germany has reclassified the UK as well. We've tried everything to managed the trip in line with the restrictions but this is just too much. We cannot extend our holidays to include a 14 day quarantine for all of us. We live out in the sticks and there are no supermarket deliveries here.
Both DH and I are teachers. There is no break between Christmas and Easter here, so we really needed this one to happen. Now we've got several more weeks to go without knowing whether it will actually be possible next time.
I've now managed to amend most of our bookings so we can go at Easter, hoping that the situation is better then. However, we are absolutely gutted about not being able to go.

Original poster

brokeneurotrash · 19/12/2021 13:48

@Dizzyhedgehog

We haven't been home in two years. DS5 hasn't seen his grandparents in real life during that time, either. We were meant to drive to the UK next Wednesday. Everything booked and prepped for ages, all the sodding paperwork ready. We are both vaccinated, had our boosters a month ago and DS is scheduled to get his in January. We have PCR tests booked both for here and for the UK, which I now need to cancel. We had timed it so DS could finish his mandatory quarantine on our return before the end of the school holidays. When the French closed things down, we managed to change our bookings to go from Holland. Now Germany has reclassified the UK as well. We've tried everything to managed the trip in line with the restrictions but this is just too much. We cannot extend our holidays to include a 14 day quarantine for all of us. We live out in the sticks and there are no supermarket deliveries here. Both DH and I are teachers. There is no break between Christmas and Easter here, so we really needed this one to happen. Now we've got several more weeks to go without knowing whether it will actually be possible next time. I've now managed to amend most of our bookings so we can go at Easter, hoping that the situation is better then. However, we are absolutely gutted about not being able to go.

I'm heart broken for you. How will you spend it, now you're here ?

I would love to go at Easter too. But I'm pregnant and it will be too close to the birth I think.

Then I'll have a small baby and a toddler, so traveling is out of the question for a long time. Maybe I'll go in January or February, if they'll let me in. I personally don't think they'll restrict it for long. As soon as their omicron wave starts properly, they're likely to open it up- like they did with delta.

I am hopeful for you for Easter !

OP posts:

BoredOfCbeebies · 19/12/2021 13:52

Yep, supposed to be visiting close/only family in the Netherlands, and I haven't been for 2.5 years. 😓 Thankfully I hadn't told the DC I was hoping we would go, so at least it's only me that's disappointed.

Dizzyhedgehog · 19/12/2021 14:11

@brokeneurotrash
We'll go food shopping tomorrow (shops are closed here on a Sunday) and get lots of Christmas food to enjoy. Luckily, I insisted we get a Christmas tree despite our plans, so the house is decorated and Christmassy anyway.
I've booked more swimming lessons for DS and will organise playdates with his little friends. We wanted to go to a pottery place to paint plates and mugs (and a dinosaur) and perhaps to the cinema and soft play centre. We'll meet up with colleagues and their children, who are now also stuck here.
Despite the travel restrictions in relation to the UK, we are still able to go to places and do things here. Germany is comparatively "open" for anyone, who is vaccinated and kids under six don't need to wear masks or tested. Our case numbers are falling and especially in the area we live in, they are quite low anyway, so there aren't many restrictions.

Fingers crossed that you can manage to go over soon. Perhaps the summer will be better.

witheringrowan · 19/12/2021 14:17

My sister is having her 2nd Christmas on her own in her tiny Paris studio flat. Fortunately I managed to get over to see her for a weekend in November. Another year of setting up the ipad in the dining room so she can join us for Christmas lunch!

SagelyNodding · 19/12/2021 14:17

I also haven't been back to the UK for 2.5 years To be honest, I didn't even try to book to travel this Christmas! I feel really bad for those who did and now can't go.
I miss my family so much, I will be a wreck on Christmas Day, but keeping a brave face as I'll be at the in-laws...so fed up of COVID

BarkminsterBlue · 19/12/2021 14:20

I'm so sorry, OP. It's really hard. I have several friends who are seriously re-evaluating their decisions to live abroad after the events of the last few years.

Hamjamwich · 19/12/2021 14:22

My sister I law was flying tomorrow to see her family. Her mum is 80 and she has not seen her for 2 years now. Devastating news

Original poster

brokeneurotrash · 19/12/2021 14:29

@BarkminsterBlue

I'm so sorry, OP. It's really hard. I have several friends who are seriously re-evaluating their decisions to live abroad after the events of the last few years.

I've wanted to relocate back to Europe for years. But my husband just won't do it.

OP posts:

FeltCarrot · 19/12/2021 14:30

My brother and his family were due to fly from Germany on Thursday to stay with our 81 yo mother. We had family plans for Xmas Eve ( my nephew has flown in from Canada) Xmas day and Boxing Day with various people visiting them.
His children are devastated and he will lose a lot of money on COVID tests etc.
It’s just all very sad.

JustLikeSugar · 19/12/2021 14:31

Not directly impacted, but very good friends of mine were supposed to travel home for holidays. Her mum is in a care home, and not in the best of health, but they've had to cancel their trip. Technically they'd be able to make the trip, but given the rates, and the concern for her vulnerable mum, they've decided to wait a few weeks.

I don't have any expectation that things will improve a lot, except for the huge seasonal variation factor. We have had very high rates here for a long time now, and to be honest I understand why other countries don't want to take a risk with us.

InvincibleInvisibility · 19/12/2021 14:32

We had booked to go to the UK to see my parents and celebrate Christmas. The UK restrictions made it just too complicated, expensive and uncertain. We are all gutted.

However we were luckily able to take advantage of a few random windows: July 2020 in the UK. July 2021 in France. October 2021 in the UK (had to send the DC over as unaccompanied minors cos they were allowed to travel but I wasn't!).

My DC used to see their grandparents every day so already when we moved to different countries it was hard enough doing every 6-7 weeks. A year is just awful.

And of course the fact that every holiday we plan now carries huge risks of being cancelled or complicated. Next ones in February and April are already booked but who knows what will happen!

Toastmost · 19/12/2021 14:33

My neighbour was supposed to have her daughter and family come to visit for Christmas but with all of the testing etc they understandably cancelled :( I had an old ipad I don't use anymore so helped her set up Skype so can at least video call them now.

PrivateHall · 19/12/2021 16:48

I am so sorry everyone who has had their plans wrecked Fingers crossed you can reschedule soon

thegcatsmother · 19/12/2021 16:52

My db is supposedly driving over to UK from Belgium this week for Christmas. He thinks it will all go smoothly (UK military). We will see.

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