To ask how you maintain professional relationships as a Childminder?

[isaisaisabel]

Reflecting on this past 8 months of childminding I have done, I can't help feel that my terms and conditions of NMCA contract have been largely ignored.

Can any childminders tell me how you ensure parents respect your setting as much as they would respect a nursery setting without upsetting them or harming the relationship?

Examples:

Repeated lateness which has infringed on my family life and evenings with my own DC. It is usually 15/20 minutes but daily which really adds up. I cannot help feel that they would not do this with a nursery.

Repeated late payments which have cost me in terms of direct debits being missed. I need to keep good credit to keep on top of my mortgage and a good credit rating.

Bringing in children who are coughing or having a high temperature and generally quite ill. Sometimes their siblings are off nursery for these reasons but the same doesn't apply to my setting.

I have only been doing this for 8 months but am relying on a good reputation and really want to make the business work. I have had comments about how expensive childcare is from one father who seems to think the amount I'm paid is my net pay, which it isn't. It's a very long day which is fine but these issues and comments make me feel like I am being treated like a babysitter not a childcare setting.

How to build a good reputation and relationship with parents but nip these things in the bud before my business expands? I'm not good at confrontation and have left a job that I was at for over a decade where I worked quietly in an office, but starting up my own business has made me realise that I probably need to become more assertive.

Experienced CM's, AIBU and is this just part of the job or am I being taken for a mug.

I would send a letter home to all parents stating that as of the new year you will be charging a late fee, a late payment fee, and that unwell children are not allowed to attend and that you will send them home if necessary.

Not a CM but it’s clearly one set of rules for you and another for nurseries which is really unfair.

Try to do some online courses or listen to podcasts from women with their own businesses and how to be assertive enough to not let this happen but maintain a good rapport.

I used a childminder and she always had rules very similar to a nursery.

She would work later than a nursery but only by prior notice. Her hours of work were 7-5 and over this had to be agreed.

She communicated professionally, gave regular policy updates and changes etc and reminders of the contracts.

I'm a childminder.
1: I advise getting paid monthly in advance, if fees are not paid, care is refused.
2: enforce a late payment fee, mine is £10 per 15 mins, I now get no lateness , same for people turning up early, again if its not paid you tell them you will be refusing care until outstanding fee is paid.
3: send a coughing, ill child home, every single time, do not be persuaded otherwise, if parents won't collect, you contact their emergency contact, they'll soon stop messing around when they have to explain themselves to someone else.
4: refer them back to the contract that they signed and agreed too.
Don't engage in any chat about the amount you get paid, what you earn is your business, if you wanted you could point out how rude it is to talk about someone else's earnings.
You'll toughen up in time, it's hard starting off.
Do you have a network of other cms for support? I found that was the best thing to help me .
I've found the firmer I am the more parents respect my position and my business, if you get overly friendly, or compromise too much, they will respect you as a professional childcare setting less.
Good luck op, its a great job, but can also be really hard .

You need to get a bit tougher op.

Unfortunately there are always some parents who will take the piss a bit and I suspect these parents see child-minders as fair game because by definition it’s a more informal setting. But there’s no reason why you can’t have clear terms and conditions to minimise the risk of this happening. You need to set expectations of your clients and communicate these expectations very clearly.

For example, most nurseries and wraparound care settings will have a policy along the lines of £1 per minute charged for every minute late at pick up time. So if they’re 15 minutes late it’s a £15 fine. There is absolutely no reason why you can’t also do something like this. I do the admin for a wraparound care setting and I can tell you then when we fine a family for late collection once they never do it again!

You can word a letter nicely, you can be friendly and non confrontational in your approach but you do need to stand your ground.

You also need something in your terms and conditions stating your payment dates (ie a week or month in advance or whatever) and making it clear that repeated late payments may result in a place at your setting being withdrawn.

Its time to give all parents another copy of ts and cs including sanctions that you will putting in place for late collection and payment.

Late payment fees
Late collection penalty payment, £5 per 10 mintues

Thank you all. I made a really clear terms and conditions that is strict and outlines why I can't have lateness due to my own DC, one of which has special needs and relies on my support in the evenings with hw.

The payment is very two weeks in advance.

I would never dream of being that strict but I am now seeing why @Chickychoccyegg are this strict.

It makes me sad to think they don't mind being constantly late with collections and know it's disrespectful and against terms and conditions (i have a late fee but don't enforce it) when I know they wouldn't do that with a nursery.

Also bringing in children with covid symptoms knowing I will have to close down if myself or my family get it and I will lose my self-employed income.

Going forward for the NY I will put your advice into action and be friendly but not let that friendliness mean I am put in a disadvantaged position.

@Chickychoccyegg

I'm a childminder. 1: I advise getting paid monthly in advance, if fees are not paid, care is refused. 2: enforce a late payment fee, mine is £10 per 15 mins, I now get no lateness , same for people turning up early, again if its not paid you tell them you will be refusing care until outstanding fee is paid. 3: send a coughing, ill child home, every single time, do not be persuaded otherwise, if parents won't collect, you contact their emergency contact, they'll soon stop messing around when they have to explain themselves to someone else. 4: refer them back to the contract that they signed and agreed too. Don't engage in any chat about the amount you get paid, what you earn is your business, if you wanted you could point out how rude it is to talk about someone else's earnings. You'll toughen up in time, it's hard starting off. Do you have a network of other cms for support? I found that was the best thing to help me . I've found the firmer I am the more parents respect my position and my business, if you get overly friendly, or compromise too much, they will respect you as a professional childcare setting less. Good luck op, its a great job, but can also be really hard .

I'm not a CM but this sounds like great advice. Don't allow yourself to be a pushover and they'll soon stop taking the piss!

Oh and ill children will not be accepted/sent home, state high temperatures etc

I suspect though that this will sour relationships a bit? Is this to be expected that it be treated in a very business like way?

I suspect the YABU voters are the ones that take would take the piss with childminders because it’s not a nursery setting.

Nothing about your post is unreasonable OP, don’t let them away with it.

It won’t sour the relationship, it’ll make them respect your more.

If you have a late fee in your contract, 'but don't enforce it', then you don't really have a late fee. Presumably parents pick up on time at the nursery because they do enforce their late fee.
It's sad that people take advantage, but I agree with reissuing your Ts & Cs to everyone for the new year and saying in your email 'From Jan 1 care will be refused if fees have not been paid in advance as per the contract, and all late pick-ups will be charged at £10 for up to 15 minutes and £5 per minute after that (or whatever your contract says).
Then don't feeel sorry for people or let them off or ypu will end up back where you are now.
You are a business. You need the parents to treat you professionally in the way you treat looking after their children professionally.

OP they ‘wouldn’t do that with a nursery’ because the nursery enforces their late fee policy!

If you’re too gentle, unfortunately some people will take advantage.

You will probably find that parents will respect you more for being more business like tbh.

I've found the firmer I am the more parents respect my position and my business, if you get overly friendly, or compromise too much, they will respect you as a professional childcare setting less.
This is brilliant advice

You can be firm and set fair boundaries, backed up by an effective and fair contract. I think it does depend on the families you work with to be honest, if someone was late once in 2 years I'd be tempted to waive, if it was constant I'd charge (get a clause in the contract £x if y mins late), and if constant give notice to them- again, this can be in the contract that both parties can give 28 days notice to end the agreement. Send out a clear policy on illness, and make sure to stick to it, for your sake and also the other children in your care. If that means turning someone away at drop off or phoning during the day to say they need to be picked up then so be it.

I don’t see why it would sour relationships. And honestly, if someone is getting pissy that you are enforcing the very reasonable terms of their contract, do you really want their business?

I use a CM. She has occasionally sent my child home for a temperature or vomiting (neither of which she had when I dropped her off), there’s no hard feelings. Yes, it’s a pain for me, but it is what it is. I am also aware she may charge me if I collect late - though she never has, probably as I’ve only been late twice in a year, both times due to unexpected traffic and I called to let her know. I wouldn’t have complained if she has charged me though, as it’s in the contract.

I had one toddler unwell and coughing like crazy in my face on arrival and the parent didn't bat an eyelid and muttered something about a cold.

I know how important it is for the parents to work but also they are in great jobs with sick pay paid for or even if they take parental leave without pay their roles are secure.

If I close down because I get sick I lose most of my income and it feels like they don't care. Although a new family have joined me and are really mindful of my circumstances so far so not all parents are the same.

1. Late collection fee - make it hurt and do enforce it
2. change your in advance payment to. 4 weeks
3. strict illness policy. Is there a CM organisation which gives guidelines what is reasonable?

You may loose some customers but we had these rules and I hadn't had any problems obeying to them.

Yes thank you everyone that's commented with this great advice that has hit the nail on the head. It really is my own fault for trying to be too accommodating and not cause problems.

I guess I expect people to just respect contracts, terms and conditions because I would but I will have to start enforcing terms and conditions.

@isaisaisabel

I had one toddler unwell and coughing like crazy in my face on arrival and the parent didn't bat an eyelid and muttered something about a cold.

I know how important it is for the parents to work but also they are in great jobs with sick pay paid for or even if they take parental leave without pay their roles are secure.

If I close down because I get sick I lose most of my income and it feels like they don't care. Although a new family have joined me and are really mindful of my circumstances so far so not all parents are the same.

I mean small children do get a lot of coughs and colds, at the moment if they've had a PCR test that's negative and are well enough to join in etc I'd be okay as some would never be in otherwise! Of course if they can keep them home that's even better, but I guess again it's about following guidance and putting in place measures you are okay with.

I was a childminder for five years before returning to teaching.

1 - Use a late fee policy. I only had to implement this once for a parent onto an invoice and they were never late in paying again!

2 - Remind them of times and again state in policy that drop offs/pick ups need to be on time or you will charge.

3 - Could you check temperature on arrival? Unfortunately, younger children do tend to have more bugs and I certainly looked after a few poorly children. You could suggest LFT's daily?

@Toastmost

New coughs and temperature need a negative test in most nurseries to be sure not to infect others just in case. I’d probably ask for a LFT if they seemed unwell with a new cough, not really fair for parents to present them with this.

I run a nursery,
Parents are late a lot. We introduced late fees, they don’t really.
They bring children in sick, they pay late. I’m lucky that I don’t always see them after I’ve had to chase them or call them, where as you have answer the door to them so it’s more tricky.

But it just a general attitude towards early years really that you are hired help.

Join the pacey Facebook page if you haven’t already.

[quote Tillsforthrills]@Toastmost

New coughs and temperature need a negative test in most nurseries to be sure not to infect others just in case. I’d probably ask for a LFT if they seemed unwell with a new cough, not really fair for parents to present them with this.[/quote]
Yes hence why I said if they'd had a negative PCR test?

could you check all temperatures before entry.
if you do it for everybody, everyday, then it just becomes part of the routine, like hand-sanitising on entry.
i know it's not a perfect indicator, but maybe it would help you set the tone, that you are in charge and will not accept any child who is ill.
you definitely need to see it in more business like terms.
you are right; many of the parent literally do not care if you lose your business, or family time or anything else, except in so far as it inconveniences them.
that's the reality. they are customers not friends. do not think they are on your side. they use your services, and possibly choose you because you are so soft.
or you used to be. not from now on though, eh?
new year. new leaf.
good luck.