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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Yelling for cat at all hours?

48 replies

Hairyfriend · 17/12/2021 22:07

A lady at the end of our quiet, cul-de-sac lost her indoor cat a month ago. She starts at 7am, walking up and down the street calling out the cats name, at least once during the day, then again between 9-10pm.

I appreciate it must be so stressful and heart breaking, but AIBU that waking the street 7am, then flashing a torch in gardens and windows at 10pm is being unreasonable?

OP posts:

kikipie · 17/12/2021 22:53

How heartless are you? Those are the times that cats are more active so she’s more likely to find it. Aren’t most people getting up for work/school around 7, if not already leaving the house?

TrainspottingWelsh · 17/12/2021 22:54

@TheFairyCaravan of course calling a cat is a normal everyday noise. She's trying to encourage it home, and unless she has an exceptionally unusual voice it's unlikely she is able to combine an enticing tone with bellowing at full volume. And she probably isn't on mumsnet so it hasn't occurred to her most people are asleep by 10pm, still asleep at 7am, and are all such light sleepers they are woken by a torch outside.

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 17/12/2021 22:55

@FrownedUpon

She sounds bonkers. No it’s not reasonable to wander the street shouting at 7am and 10pm. I’d have said something already.

I'd had said something right back at you. And it ends in off.

Original poster

Hairyfriend · 17/12/2021 22:55

@minipie

Poor woman.

I think 7am and 9-10pm are normal times to be awake aren’t they? And she’s not using a megaphone?

I’m not sure you can complain given the timing and it can’t be all that loud.

Its dark at 7am and has woken me every day for the past month- despite me now wearing ear plugs to bed! DH sleeps early due to shift work. Its also dark 9-10pm and he is woken by the torch flashing in our window- despite curtains.

I have done everything I can to help her, including notifying other neighbors, checking our garden etc, but just feel the daily yelling, wakings and torch flashing is getting to me.

OP posts:

alienbaby · 17/12/2021 22:56

You're still in bed at 7am? Uhhh OK!

minipie · 17/12/2021 22:56

im it’s a bit like having an older teenager whereas a dog is more like a toddler.

Dogs need much more hands on care, are smellier and grubbier, you have to deal with their poo but on the other hand they respond to rewards, you always know where they are and they think you are God.

Cats need way less from you and are much more self sufficient, quiet and clean, but they will treat you with a certain disdain, won’t do what they are told and will put the fear of God in you when they periodically disappear.

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 17/12/2021 22:58

You need better curtains op.

Original poster

Hairyfriend · 17/12/2021 22:59

@alienbaby

You're still in bed at 7am? Uhhh OK!

Normally, yes! I don't have children, I WFH which I set myself is sometimes working late. Why should I be awake before 7am?

OP posts:

alienbaby · 17/12/2021 23:00

@Hairyfriend
You shouldn't but equally you shouldn't whine about people doing normal stuff at normal hours.

How do you feel about binmen?

thunderandsunshine01 · 17/12/2021 23:05

If it was 5am and midnight and she’s shouting at the top of her lungs then maybe. But 7am is not unreasonable at all despite your own personal sleeping patterns. I can hear all sorts at 7am - bin lorry, dogs barking on walks before work, car engines… and 10pm isn’t particularly late.

WomanStanleyWoman · 17/12/2021 23:08

@alienbaby

You're still in bed at 7am? Uhhh OK!

Why do you say that like it’s an outlandish time to be in bed? It really isn’t. Have you missed that, for the best part of two years, people have been encouraged to work from home where possible? If your ‘commute’ only involves a walk downstairs, why would you bother to get up two hours before you start work?

BlackCatz · 17/12/2021 23:09

I'd do the same if it was my cat. Soz.

imthenextinline · 17/12/2021 23:11

@alienbaby

You're still in bed at 7am? Uhhh OK!

God I wish I was, I have to get up at 6.30 for work but would be 100% still in bed at 7am like DH is if I had the choice. I don't think 7 is a reasonable time to expect everyone else to be up, my neighbours lights are all out when I get in the car at 7.

Mummy1608 · 17/12/2021 23:17

Yanbu OP. Still being asleep or at least in bed at 7am is pretty normal. And I have a toddler and a long commute. I just get ready quickly.
It is very sad for your neighbour, but she must realise she isn't going to find her cat this way if she's tried the exact same thing over again for a month. Call me Cruella, but some people really lose perspective when it comes to pets! But I admit I'm not a "pet person"

WomanStanleyWoman · 17/12/2021 23:21

I don’t understand the ‘Why not help with the search?’ posts. If the woman hasn’t found the cat in a month of searching, the OP isn’t going to suddenly uncover it.

Or is it just people showing off how much more kind and caring they are than the OP?

TheHateIsNotGood · 17/12/2021 23:26

I voted yabu - it's not unusual to keep searching for a lost pet and it's worth it because sometimes they do turn up. If it was a lost child or vulnerable adult then the police, community and etc would be turning up to look.

Which would be a lot more disruptive than a lone lady calling out for her lost cat.

Grow a heart OP, you might need it one day.

RavingAnnie · 17/12/2021 23:27

The competitive early risers have arrived. Apparently having a morning circadian rhythm is something that makes you morally superior.

minipie · 17/12/2021 23:29

Nope, I’m an owl and would sleep till 10 every day if I could.

But I do recognise that for the rest of the world it’s normal to be up and about and making noise by 7. (Weirdos).

Tivermeshimbers1 · 17/12/2021 23:30

Wait has the cat not come back for a
Month and she’s been out every morning and night shouting for it?

YANBU. People work shifts and don’t want to be disturbed by someone shouting every morning.

I’d be shouting “YOUR CAT IS DEID!” out the window.

I’m joking (kind of) but that’s not normal.

100problems · 18/12/2021 08:00

This isn't necessarily your job, but since it's annoying you it's a way to end it.

Mobilise all residents of the cul de sac to do a garage/shed/ outhouse/henhouse sweep this weekend.

A collective, overt effort will convince her that the cat is dead as a door mail not in the vicinity for returning, thus her search is now fruitless.

SamMil · 18/12/2021 08:10

This is so sad, poor lady.

I wouldn't complain about someone waking me up when they're going through such an awful time.

Sillawithans · 18/12/2021 08:42

I don't believe for one second that she wakes you up despite wearing ear plugs and that she's waking your husband up shining the torch. Are his eyes not closed or the curtains.....

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 18/12/2021 09:12

@Sillawithans

I don't believe for one second that she wakes you up despite wearing ear plugs and that she's waking your husband up shining the torch. Are his eyes not closed or the curtains.....

I'm finding this hard too. Unless she has a homing beacon and a megaphone

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