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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

New house - new neighbours - new parking woes

144 replies

PeeAche · 16/12/2021 14:21

Moved into the house of our dreams this summer - but didn't realise parking would be such an issue.

We have a "driveway" that is wide enough to accommodate 3 cars. It is L shaped so 2 cars would be parked in a line and 1 car off to the side IYSWIM.

We don't have 3 cars though, we have 2. And we thought it would be perfect. But after we moved in, we realised that space 3 (the one off to the side) is impossible to get into, due to the narrow entry way into the drive.

Because spaces 1 & 2 are back to back, we only really get use out of 1 space.

The people that lived here before us were very elderly and housebound.

So the solution is to whip out the gate post and make it all wider at the front. Ideally we would also increase the dropped curb.

Parking on the road should be no issue. It's a tiny village with no shops, no school and no attractions. Just a line of houses and every single house has a drive - apart from the house opposite. The house opposite have 3 enormous cars and nowhere to put them. The road is narrow.

Their preference is to park them right outside our house - which would be no problem, except they hem us in on all sides. They park so that each end of their cars are overhanging our dropped curb by just a few mm. The third car, they park directly opposite our drive. It's not technically an illegal parking formation but it does mean that it's a 6-point-turn getting onto or off our own driveway. Every day. It's driving me batty!!!

I have tried having a friendly word and they just said "we've lived here for 22 years" and nothing else. No apology, explanation or owt. Just that. And then they walked away.

I realise this is a very small thing to be complaining about. But I am at my wits end after missing my own midwife appointment last week because they had totally blocked me in!

The other thing is (although the speed limit is 30), people average around 50mph on our road and I can't see round the tunnel of car they have created. It's like the riskiest creep-n-peep ever. And it's an almost daily occurrence that some vehicle is bombing it along and has to do an emergency stop because I'm sat in the middle of the road, trapped between 3 cars, doing my dodgy 6-point-turn 😅

If I call the council and show them how dangerous it all is, how likely is it that they will let me increase my dropped curb by another foot or so? Or apply some double yellows? Or am I in fantasy land? And would this be the biggest Dick Move ever to my neighbours - who would then have to shuffle along the street to the next spots?

We do try to nab at least 1 of the spots with 1 of our cars, if we can - and leave a good foot of space so that the driveway isn't all hemmed in. But we work full time and the cars are in constant use. Whereas our neighbours seem happy to leave theirs there for days on end. We can't both be parking on the street all the time as we have young kids to load in (and I'm preggers). Plus my car is electric so I need to be able to charge it.

Our house is quite wide so there are a total of road 3 spaces along our frontage. They could shuffle down a bit and not use the one that hems in our drive!

Oh, for the record, I drive a Golf so it's neither a big nor small car. DH drives something similar but not electric. I'm not trying to manoeuvre some angry tank!

So, the Q is:

AIBU to contact the council and try to get the curb lowered / permanently change the parking situation?

YANBU: This sounds fine and safe and your neighbours will get over it.
YABU: They've done this for 20 years and now you think you should shake it all up? It's just parking. Get a life. Etc.

Opinions from both sides welcome! I can submit diagrams if this helps... I have the day off.

OP posts:
ParkingDiagram · 17/12/2021 11:07

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll

It’s odd that your neighbours are being so provocative about it when you’ve only been there a short time.

No, it isn't - they're deliberately setting out their demands from the outset. The one 'qualification' they have that OP cannot possibly have is how long they've lived there for, so that's the card they're playing. Not that it is a card to play - all they're doing is admitting that they've been able to get away with selfish parking for so long, because the previous residents didn't need full vehicle access to their house.

That said, though, if they were elderly and housebound, they very likely had numerous visitors - family, friends, delivery drivers, prescription drop-offs, doctors, carers, ambulances - who needed to at least park outside their house and would have found it much easier to be able to use their drive when visiting. Just because the old folk didn't drive themselves, their right to full use of their property was royally trampled on - for 22 years, as CF neighbours freely admit.

CFs routinely use the excuse that 'nobody stopped me before' as if it means that they've somehow acquired a right. Oddly enough, bullying vulnerable people for over two decades does not 'earn' you any actual rights. They should be deeply ashamed of themselves, not proud and entitled - but they sound like 'that kind' of people who simply couldn't care less about anybody else.

It IS odd to behave so provocatively to a complete stranger, whatever way you slice it. The neighbours are parking in a manner designed to be dangerous and obstructive to the OP when they have no reason to do so.

That said, the whys are irrelevant I guess, they’ve identified themselves as cunts so the next step is dealing with it.

YouDoIDo · 17/12/2021 15:41

@7catsisnotenough haha no I meant on her diagram 😅

WhatATimeToBeAlive · 17/12/2021 15:51

Definitely a dropped kerb. Get the widest one you can! Also post pictures on here www.fixmystreet.com/ and it sends the details to the right people to see if it can be resolved.

Christmasmum3 · 17/12/2021 16:13

100% agree with all those who have suggested knocking on their door every time they park too close Grin

I've had similar CF neighbours since we moved in, they have an empty driveway and park 2 vans either side of our drive and 2 cars in front of our house - ugh! One time they parked too close to the drive and I knew I had to head back out shortly so I parked blocking my own drive and inches away from the front bumper of one of their vans. I imagine this made it very difficult to reverse and manouevre into oncoming rush hour traffic, by the time returned to my car the van was gone and since then they have always left that side of our drive clear. Petty but effective.

Juvenile tactics might work as a deterrent until you can shell out for the kerb dropping and H.

7catsisnotenough · 17/12/2021 16:45

@YouDoIDo I take it you're beta testing too? 🤣

Lovewinemorethanhusband · 17/12/2021 17:24

I'm doing the same and have requested to increase our dropped kerb as my neighbours are driving me insane with parking over the edge of my drive, they have 4 cars and no driveway so just abandon them wherever they want , I've tried being nice and now fed up of it, my neighbour on the other side has just moved in and doesn't have a car so she's fine with it as I've asked her. I'm praying we get the go ahead before I loose the plot in the morning before the school run !

007Stocko · 17/12/2021 17:51

I blame the shed. If that wasn't their all would be good hahaha

I would definitely go for the widening of the dropped curb, although presumably that would need to match the width of your driveway so would require a change to your garden.

Also investigate the white lined H - take photos of the parked cars, the bridge, etc to prove its a difficult manoeuvre.

takenforgrantednana · 17/12/2021 18:01

@PeeAche

Moved into the house of our dreams this summer - but didn't realise parking would be such an issue.

We have a "driveway" that is wide enough to accommodate 3 cars. It is L shaped so 2 cars would be parked in a line and 1 car off to the side IYSWIM.

We don't have 3 cars though, we have 2. And we thought it would be perfect. But after we moved in, we realised that space 3 (the one off to the side) is impossible to get into, due to the narrow entry way into the drive.

Because spaces 1 & 2 are back to back, we only really get use out of 1 space.

The people that lived here before us were very elderly and housebound.

So the solution is to whip out the gate post and make it all wider at the front. Ideally we would also increase the dropped curb.

Parking on the road should be no issue. It's a tiny village with no shops, no school and no attractions. Just a line of houses and every single house has a drive - apart from the house opposite. The house opposite have 3 enormous cars and nowhere to put them. The road is narrow.

Their preference is to park them right outside our house - which would be no problem, except they hem us in on all sides. They park so that each end of their cars are overhanging our dropped curb by just a few mm. The third car, they park directly opposite our drive. It's not technically an illegal parking formation but it does mean that it's a 6-point-turn getting onto or off our own driveway. Every day. It's driving me batty!!!

I have tried having a friendly word and they just said "we've lived here for 22 years" and nothing else. No apology, explanation or owt. Just that. And then they walked away.

I realise this is a very small thing to be complaining about. But I am at my wits end after missing my own midwife appointment last week because they had totally blocked me in!

The other thing is (although the speed limit is 30), people average around 50mph on our road and I can't see round the tunnel of car they have created. It's like the riskiest creep-n-peep ever. And it's an almost daily occurrence that some vehicle is bombing it along and has to do an emergency stop because I'm sat in the middle of the road, trapped between 3 cars, doing my dodgy 6-point-turn 😅

If I call the council and show them how dangerous it all is, how likely is it that they will let me increase my dropped curb by another foot or so? Or apply some double yellows? Or am I in fantasy land? And would this be the biggest Dick Move ever to my neighbours - who would then have to shuffle along the street to the next spots?

We do try to nab at least 1 of the spots with 1 of our cars, if we can - and leave a good foot of space so that the driveway isn't all hemmed in. But we work full time and the cars are in constant use. Whereas our neighbours seem happy to leave theirs there for days on end. We can't both be parking on the street all the time as we have young kids to load in (and I'm preggers). Plus my car is electric so I need to be able to charge it.

Our house is quite wide so there are a total of road 3 spaces along our frontage. They could shuffle down a bit and not use the one that hems in our drive!

Oh, for the record, I drive a Golf so it's neither a big nor small car. DH drives something similar but not electric. I'm not trying to manoeuvre some angry tank!

So, the Q is:

AIBU to contact the council and try to get the curb lowered / permanently change the parking situation?

YANBU: This sounds fine and safe and your neighbours will get over it.
YABU: They've done this for 20 years and now you think you should shake it all up? It's just parking. Get a life. Etc.

Opinions from both sides welcome! I can submit diagrams if this helps... I have the day off.

you might not be able to get back home in time to take the parking places up, but you could hire a skip to put in place of one of their cars! would it be possible for you to put 2 large boulders either side of the gate which would men they cant overhang and block you in then.

i would also tell them about the missed appt and state that the next time it might be your hubby banging on their door at 3 am when your waters go!

ParkingDiagram · 17/12/2021 19:23

@takenforgrantednana You don’t need to quote the OP, it appears at the top of every page.

takenforgrantednana · 17/12/2021 19:25

[quote ParkingDiagram]@takenforgrantednana You don’t need to quote the OP, it appears at the top of every page.[/quote]
but its the only way i can get this thing to open so i can post a reply

Crystalgirl90 · 17/12/2021 19:41

Yanbu, we have a very similar situation and it's so infuriating how ridiculously selfish people can be - just parking with no consideration for your drive! I feel your pain!

Crystalgirl90 · 17/12/2021 19:42

@2bazookas

Golly,. I hope their cars parked on the road don't get damaged in the night.
🤣🤣 I thought exactly this!!! Wouldn't that be a shaaaaaaame!
ivykaty44 · 17/12/2021 19:44

park outside your house and stop using the drive, then it will not always happen

but road side parking is free and on the occasions you park in their spots they'll have to find other places to park

if they say anything, just say

you kept blocking us in the drive so its become redundant, obviously wed use it but when we asked you not to block us in you weren't in agreement

ivykaty44 · 17/12/2021 19:45

Golly,. I hope their cars parked on the road don't get damaged in the night.v

don't go acting illegally and causing damage to other property - its not on,

Bugbabe1970 · 17/12/2021 19:46

Park on the road outside your house as much as you can
Buy an old banger and put it outside your house and move it when you need to park there

Sosoo · 17/12/2021 20:14

This annoys me just reading it so I feel your pain !

Cantstopeatingchocolate · 17/12/2021 20:21

EVERY time you leave the house, drive to the end of the pavement get out, knock and ask them to move 1 car as you can't see the road to pull out.
EVERY
TIME
Make sure they see you struggling back in your car (even if you're not) and muttering 'I'm too pregnant to be jumping in and out of cars'
Then when baby is here let them know you'll honk your horn when you need out of drive cos you can't leave a baby unattended in a car.

Or as others have said. Drop the kerb the whole length of space 3 and get the road marked.
We have a neighbour whose drive is directly opposite ours, one car on drive but the other on the pavement just in front of their house. If it wasn't on the pavement we wouldn't be able to leave our drive and turn right without multiple turns......turning right takes us on to a corner where cars can drive far too fast with no visibility. So I feel they are trying to be considerate for us and hopefully nobody will report them for parking on the pavement.

thenightsky · 17/12/2021 20:33

@ivykaty44

park outside your house and stop using the drive, then it will not always happen

but road side parking is free and on the occasions you park in their spots they'll have to find other places to park

if they say anything, just say

you kept blocking us in the drive so its become redundant, obviously wed use it but when we asked you not to block us in you weren't in agreement

100% this!
Glitter7 · 17/12/2021 20:58

Good luck - I hope you get what you wantSmile

Tigger1895 · 17/12/2021 21:11

Is it not illegal to park across a dropped curve? 22 years isn’t an excuse

Funmum34 · 17/12/2021 21:17

First world problems, as long as you can get out of your drive just leave it alone. Far more important problems for people stop being so precious

Glitter7 · 17/12/2021 21:25

Funmum34

It would be an issue if an ambulance needed access in and out of the drive though in case of an emergency though wouldn't it.

BringUsSomeFrigginPudding · 17/12/2021 21:43

You are not even remotely unreasonable. You tried to take the neighbourly approach, and they weren't having it. (Twenty-two years! Oh, well, never mind, then. That changes things! Confused )

You owe them nothing. It won't hurt them to park a bit further down the road, and they have no-one to blame but themselves.

K4fkaesque · 17/12/2021 22:16

@Funmum34

First world problems, as long as you can get out of your drive just leave it alone. Far more important problems for people stop being so precious
Funmum34, have the new neighbours across from you been moaning about how you park your cars across their driveway?
ParkingDiagram · 17/12/2021 22:19

@ivykaty44

Golly,. I hope their cars parked on the road don't get damaged in the night.v

don't go acting illegally and causing damage to other property - its not on,

For fuck’s sake.

There’s always some idiot who recommends criminal damage. Just look at any pavement parking thread and there will be a whole string of idiots who boast about deliberately dragging a pushchair down the side of a parked car just to make a point, even when there’s more than enough room for them to get by.

If you think that anonymously vandalising someone else’s property is the way to deal with a problem then you need help.