I really hate my job

[FedupAn32]

I really dislike my job. I’m part time but I still do same (if not more) than I did when I was full time. I resent the time it takes up on my weekends and evenings. I feel guilty and I have zero energy and time to spend with my own kids. I constantly think about work. They are getting me to do more stuff snd I’ve just read an email that shows I’m gaining more responsibility but I don’t really want it. It will not mean more money btw just more responsibility. I cannot say no.

I wasn’t going to mention my job as I know sometimes it can get a bit nasty on AIBU. The job is a secondary teacher (NOT English as I know I’ve probably made some typos/ other errors that might get picked up). I feel so low snd absolutely fed up. I hate the comments made by people when I previously posted under a different name that I get all the holidays! I feel I’m having a nervous breakdown. I have constant butterflies in my stomach and feeling of dread. When I’m
Actually there reaching the kids I love it and think actually it’s not too bad but st hone abs on days off I panick about things I should be doing and panic reading my emails.

I’m thinking of quitting snd just doing supply. Next year I know will be really crazy at work as there will be lots of additional pressure on me.

Please advise on what you would do. Also please be kind I’m really struggling right now.

Not reaching the kids I meant to say teaching!

I think if your job makes you this miserable then it's not worth it. It doesn't matter what others perceive the perks of your job to be, if you are not enjoying your life because of your job then you need to quit. We work to live, we don't live to work!

Have a think about how long you've been feeling like this and if it's been a while and this isn't just a recent thing then I say go for it, it sounds like you've got a pretty good backup plan lined up anyway. Even just making the decision to quit can often lift so much of the stress because then you know there's light at the end of the tunnel x

I think quitting and doing supply sounds like the right thing for you.

You could speak to your head, explain you are struggling with work-life balance and want to be a cover supervisor or their go-to supply instead.
Cover supervisor part-time means you will be on about 800 pounds a month but is at least permanent. Supply can be haphazard, from 70 to 135 pounds a day, sometimes lots, sometimes very little - usually works out as about 18k p.a. without taking into account petrol7wear and tear on car.

I’m primary and leaving on Friday. I don’t have a proper job lined up but have got a few tutoring hours booked, plus planning a few other freelance things.

After 17 years, I just can’t do it any longer. I felt the same as you. Are you in the Leave Teaching or Life After Teaching FB group? So many people feeling the same. Life’s too short to be miserable.

Thank you so much @siaa.

I think I’ve been feeling like this since this job. I’ve been happy at my previous place but had to leave as there was no possibility of part time. I’m actually doing more here than I did in my full time position! I know I need to leave and I know it sounds ridiculous but I’ve never quit anything so I kind of feel like I’m letting everyone down. My last job I left during my maternity so didn’t feel any “shame” if that makes sense.

Thank you for messages @RandomMess. @OneWildNightWithJBJ and @SequinsandStiIettos.

@OneWildNightWithJBJ good luck and hope it works out for you no I’m not on Facebook. I do have an account from years ago that I can log into. I will check it out thank you.

Its 100% not worth it.

Before you said what your job was, I knew it was a teacher. There is no such thing as a part time teacher, except in what you get paid.

I had a huge change of heart about my career last year. I lost my sister to cancer at the age of 37 and it just made me realise life is really far too short for this bullshit.

I see what you mean but the phrase quitting in this sense doesn't mean you're running away from something, you're not quitting having a job full stop you're just leaving this one job to go to another more convenient one. Where I work people come and go all the time and no one thinks anything of it, it's quite common for people to move jobs for promotions elsewhere / better hours or pay / convenience / fit with their lives amongst other reasons x

@Thegreencup so sorry fir your loss. You’re right life is too short. Are you a teacher too?

Extra tasks being given to you: "I'm sorry, but I'm already working more than the amount that is reasonable for someone on my part-time contract. Please let me know what you would like me to drop in order to take on this extra task."

Days off: Keep them that way. Put a bounce message on your email: "I work Monday to Wednesday, so I am unable to respond to emails received in the latter part of the week until Monday afternoon." Decide on when you will work at home and do your best to stick to it. Prep/marking has a nasty tendency to take up any time you will allow it to. Full-time teachers will cut corners because there aren't enough hours in the day; you need to decide what is work time and cut corners if necessary to keep the work within it.

Consider: talking to someone about the fact that you are burning out and at risk of stress-related illness. They do have a duty of care, and in any case it is in their interests to ensure that you do not end up signed off.

Do you think others in your school are struggling? Is it a case of school piling things on everyone? - in which case talk to union rep about whether work-life balance can be raised as an issue. Is it that your department is particularly stretched (eg due to illness/staff shortage)? - in which case can your HoD or their manager look at what can be done to relieve the pressure? Or is it just that you never say no and nobody ever thinks about how much you are doing?

From your first paragraph I knew you were a teacher.

My dearest friend teaches Reception- she's supposedly part time but easily works full time hours.

I'm so sorry you're in similar position, you sound like your done with it.

Could you consider a career move?

@lanthanum there is a big staff turnover in the school. Lots of people just quit abs don’t give notice! I was shocked as my last job no one hardly left unless retirement or moving away.

Problem with extra responsibility is that as I’m in the UPS pay scale technically they can give me extra work and it’s justified. I think my last school had a big union presence whereas here they don’t.

If I was to write down pros and cons the school isn’t too bad and management are not nasty. They are actually okay but maybe I’m being too soft as evidence is pointing that many people unhappy there otherwise wouldn’t leave. I think I convince myself it’s okay until I have my next panic. Sorry if I’m not making sense I’m just so overwhelmed with everything.

I knew you were a teacher before I got to the second paragraph.
You will gets loads of work on supply at the moment. Or you could contact educationsupport.org.uk - they were extremely good at helping me get things into perspective a few years ago and getting the courage to quit.
What would happen if you said no to the extra responsibility?

@FavouriteMug I actually really enjoy teaching and can’t think of anything else I could do. Maybe supply is the answer as I will be in a different environment everyday and not get attached. I will miss my days with baby though as not sure if I will have set days on supply

@FavouriteMug From your first paragraph I knew you were a teacher Cross post!

@tulippa thank you will check that website out. I don’t think I can say no as things already in motion. What did you end up doing after teaching if you don’t mind me asking.

If I give my notice in now is it Easter I can leave or earlier?

@FedupAn32

If I give my notice in now is it Easter I can leave or earlier?

Easter. Actually, technically end of April, but if you are moving to another school that is brought forward to the start of their new term. If you are not going to another post, you don't have the right to leave until the end of April, and they don't have the right to make you leave before then. In practice, they may well agree to you finishing earlier, but then you need to be careful that what you agree to is the end of the Easter holiday, not the beginning.

Heads do have discretion to waive the notice period. That's most likely to happen if the teacher is likely to be signed off sick anyway - if they're going to have to have supply in they'd rather not be paying your salary as well.

Usually the best bet is to put in the resignation letter that you wish to resign with effect from 30th April, in line with your contract, but that, if the school prefers, you would be willing to make that so that your replacement can start at the beginning of the summer term. If you'd actually rather go as soon as possible, then you could add "I would be interested in discussing an earlier finish if you are able to replace me sooner."

@FedupAn32 I'm still teaching but I moved into prison education. It's not for everyone but is a great fit for me. Max class sizes of 12 (6 at the moment with covid restrictions) and Friday afternoons off. I've just started doing a couple of hours work on a Sunday now I'm in a manager's position. No evening or weekend work before that.
It might be a bit of a pay drop if you're on ups. My management pay is equivalent to m5.
Good luck whatever you choose. It will get better.

Quit and do supply then retrain. I did just that...havn't looked back. Teaching is a fools game...you cannot do anything to dicipline kids. Management assume it's because you aren't engaging enough. Bollocks....it's becauase the kids have all the power.

Plus why on earth don't schools provide stock lesson plans that you can tweak for differentiation? That will stop all the working till 11pm and being too tired to teach. Bonkers.

Leave. I'm not a teacher myself but good friends are. They are all at the same breaking point level. Working all hours and constant criticism and abuse from parents and children. Good luck OP.

It's an awful, awful job. I completely understand where you're coming from.

My advice would be to plan an exit strategy, having in your head that your current job is only temporary.

Look at "other workplaces" on TES jobs, look at Teach First, charities etc. Good luck!

Supply is awful and stressful. You often don't get work until the last minute and are faced with a room of kids who love to harass a supply teacher because they don't know you. Many schools have their own cover staff, so there are less opportunities.

Why don't you try another school?