GP and crisis team have prescribed me regular diazepam for anxiety secondary to family difficulties - I have CPTSD and OCD and have been pretty unwell last 2/3 weeks .
I’ve a history of addiction to OTC/prescribed codeine and dihydrocodeine that took me over a year to get off with GP reducing it very slowly - and I’m scared of going down the same route with valium (although at least you can’t buy that legally) . I don’t drink alcohol for the same reason .
I had a box of 21 2mg last week, finished on Thursday, none since then and have been having withdrawal on and off since (shivers, derealisation, panic attacks, insomnia, nightmares, loss of appetite) . Though it’s hard to work out what’s withdrawal and what’s mental health tbh .
GP said I’d be best to take a second box and use as required rather than every day and they said there’s a prescription for 21 tablets waiting on me up at the surgery .
I’m absolutely terrified of taking the second lot, they work wonders, they’re incredible - I can go out of the house with them and I can’t without right now - but I don’t want to get reliant on them, and the leaflet says that in extremes withdrawal can cause seizures, psychosis and all sorts . I vaguely remember having valium withdrawal a few years ago and lying on the floor shaking at one point as it was so bad .
It would be the fifth box I’ve had this year, two packets of six and then two packs of 21 . Always just the wee 2mg dose .
AIBU to pick up the packet and chance it, or should I leave it knowing my history? GP is fully aware I’ve had addiction before but says doesn’t count as it’s a different drug .