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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To pull my DC out of school for the rest of term?

138 replies

RiverOrla · 08/12/2021 13:03

Rates are skyrocketing at the DC’s primary. We have lots of Christmas plans with extended family (Christmas is a huge deal to us, celebrations relating to several different cultures) and I don’t want to risk it being ruined by covid. If I take them out for the rest of this week and next week (last week of term) this would seriously reduce the risk of them having it for Christmas.

Anyone else doing this?

YABU - keep them in school
YANBU - take them out to safeguard family Christmas.

OP posts:
Highlanders372 · 08/12/2021 13:30

Absolutely not, especially the 10 year old. It might be just Christmas fun stuff in school next week but I'd still leave them in, my DC enjoy all the build up in school and they will be doing some work.

peboh · 08/12/2021 13:31

Unless you're planning to stay at home and also skip all the events which are just as likely to pass covid onto your family, then yes it would be unreasonable. Education is important, and children have already missed so much.

Hotchocolateandcake · 08/12/2021 13:32

I think yabu.

Your children have a right to go to school unless there is a very good reason not to. It's likely to be like this for a long time especially during Winter.

You are in the wrong to lie too. Lying always has consequences.

thirdfiddle · 08/12/2021 13:32

My y5 seems to be just doing Xmas crafts and singing Xmas songs at this point of term. So you wouldn't be missing much in terms of education. Difficulty is asking DC to lie though, that seems like asking for trouble in future.

Original poster
RiverOrla · 08/12/2021 13:33

I’m self employed and DH is an owner of his business so technically we can ‘do what we want’ with regards to working hours etc. My DC were fully home schooled during previous lock down - in fact their teachers told me at parents evening they were some of the few who actually progressed over lockdown.

Plus it is the last week, it’s not learning new stuff. Their classes currently have between 3 and 8 children off already with it.

I don’t expect the school to provide work. I’m capable of doing that if I need to.

OP posts:
Lovethedogg · 08/12/2021 13:34

I think this is really wrong especially if you’re going to lie and say they have symptoms. That’s an awful thing to do, you’re likely to cause unnecessary worry to a lot of other people.
No-one wants to be ill and have Christmas ruined but that’s always a possibility as it was pre covid. I also don’t think it’s just about learning although children have already missed enough of that, I think they also need time out of the house and with their friends. The last week before Christmas in primary school is one of the most exciting when you’re that age ime.
I agree Education is a privilege and the message to our children shouldn’t be that you can pick and choose when to attend and lie as necessary.

Chocolatehamper · 08/12/2021 13:35

@ricepolo

And then blame the school when the children aren’t making enough progress next year?!

Education is a privilege and not something to be thrown away like this.

^ This
peboh · 08/12/2021 13:35

Would your children want to be pulled out? Personally at those ages I loved being in school the last week, christmas crafts and spending time with friends. I also think you'd be completely unreasonable to lie. If you think you have a valid reason for pulling them out, then you should be perfectly happy telling the school this.

Missmissmiiiiiiiiisss · 08/12/2021 13:36

I don’t think it’s wrong but I wouldn’t. It’s entirely Christmas stuff in school at the moment and that’s the very stuff they have missed out on, being in nativities, playing, making crafts. If it was just maths and English Id be more likely to pull them out as easier to do at home.

Crunchymum · 08/12/2021 13:37

What are you going to tell the school about their PCR tests?

Original poster
RiverOrla · 08/12/2021 13:37

DC won’t have to lie. No one will mention it come January. Or I just take it unauthorised. Their attendance has been 100%.

We wouldn’t go anywhere. All their clubs finish this week any way. Would go for walks but that is easy to avoid people. We have no events booked in the next 2 eeeks but have lots in between Xmas abc new year.

I just part of me wants to be selfish, we’ve stuck to all the rules and I just want to ensure a good Xmas for them this time.

OP posts:
JSL52 · 08/12/2021 13:37

@RiverOrla

DC are 10, 9 and 6.

Plenty of craft, games, big garden etc - lots to keep them amused at home.

My work is commission based and can work around the DC.

Would tell school they have symptoms.

Don't lie. What a bad example.
User2638483 · 08/12/2021 13:39

It’s a difficult decision but I think you need to weigh up the impact on them of effectively imposing isolation on them for 2 weeks. Both in terms of their learning and their physical and mental health.
It’s by no means a given they would get it, but of course it’s a possibility.
But I would have thought that being cooped jo for 2 weeks is definitely going to have an adverse effect on them.
What if they then get it after Christmas? Then they’ll have another 2 weeks stuck at home.

Are the xmas plans more important for them or you? Couldn’t they be rearranged in a worst case scenario?

bumblefeline · 08/12/2021 13:41

No they have had enough time off.

How can you say they have symptoms for two weeks? Won't school wonder why there is no PCR results?

Original poster
RiverOrla · 08/12/2021 13:41

I have no intention of blaming the school for lack of progress or anything else, their school has done a fab job over the last 2 years.

If I said did they want the last week at school and risk not seeing grandparents, great grandparents, panto, ice skating and other family get togethers I think they’d choose to stay off.

I guess I’m being unreasonable then. I am just so fed up if covid ruling our lives!!

OP posts:
bofski14 · 08/12/2021 13:42

Oh for crying out loud! Why do people think that school is the ONLY place that children can be educated? If OP wants to remove her children from an unsafe situation and she has the means to do it, who are any of you to guilt her into "oh but they'll miss precious school!". There is a world for children outside of 9-3. Have fun with your kids OP.

7eleven · 08/12/2021 13:45

I wonder how many people who think you shouldn’t do it have taken a holiday in term time? Not really any different. I’m a teacher by the way, so don’t support term time holidays as a rule. Last week of autumn term though…

User2638483 · 08/12/2021 13:46

Yes but she and their dad are going to be working! Not exactly dedicating their days to their child’s education.
Plus normally HE would involve going out and about but there’s not much point in missing school if they’re going to mix elsewhere!

Heartdogs · 08/12/2021 13:46

Don't deprive your kids of any more school, any more playing with friends, any more education so you can have a big Christmas. .

User2638483 · 08/12/2021 13:46

Sorry my response was to @bofski14

Cherrytart23 · 08/12/2021 13:47

@bofski14

Oh for crying out loud! Why do people think that school is the ONLY place that children can be educated? If OP wants to remove her children from an unsafe situation and she has the means to do it, who are any of you to guilt her into "oh but they'll miss precious school!". There is a world for children outside of 9-3. Have fun with your kids OP.
If its an unsafe situation then she should remove them full time not just when it suits her!
kjdmnbxz54 · 08/12/2021 13:47

Sounds like you have already decided.

But, no you shouldn't do this. School is about more than learning, so you are completely incorrect to say they won't be missing anything because it is the end of term and therefore just practising for the Christmas show.

Things like the show are important! They learn self confidence, public speaking, and it's a big achievement for them. Some kids really thrive on it, but all get something out of it. Plus it's a fun time of term, and fun with friends is so important. Hanging out at home gets boring very quickly. It would be very wrong, and thoughtless to pull them out, and that's without considering the whole moral issue of lying to the school.

Nidan2Sandan · 08/12/2021 13:47

So instead of then being in school with their friends, doing christmas plays, singing, arts, crafts, games and other fun stuff they missed out on last year and, for children, is super super fun........

You want to lock them in the house for 2 weeks except for "walks". Jeez, after 2020 I bet they've had their fill of "walks".

User2638483 · 08/12/2021 13:47

@7eleven taking a holiday is a bit different to imposing isolation on them

Lovethedogg · 08/12/2021 13:48

@RiverOrla

DC won’t have to lie. No one will mention it come January. Or I just take it unauthorised. Their attendance has been 100%.

We wouldn’t go anywhere. All their clubs finish this week any way. Would go for walks but that is easy to avoid people. We have no events booked in the next 2 eeeks but have lots in between Xmas abc new year.

I just part of me wants to be selfish, we’ve stuck to all the rules and I just want to ensure a good Xmas for them this time.

It would be selfish and I think you’re doing for yourself and not the children. Keeping them off school and isolated for the next 2 weeks so you can attend family parties between Christmas and New Year? I don’t see how you can square that as being in their best interests. As someone else has said what if you or they get ill anyway or what if they end up having to have another 2 weeks off in January?