Partners family Christmas presents

[Welshlavalove]

Spending Christmas Day with partners family for first time. His dad , sister and 2 adult children . Previously none of them or me have swapped Christmas presents I am wondering if I should this year but when my partner spends the day with my family he doesn’t buy them presents . Aibu not to buy presents ? We have been together 5 years and lived together 3 .

Could you not get a little cheap stocking filler type present just in case this year they decide they’re doing presents. Either way YWBU either way. All presents from me and my DH are considered from both of us x

I wouldn't start off a present buying tradition if one doesn't already exist.
But I would bring few bottles of champagne and some kind of decent host gift, you don't want to look like a cheapskate. Maybe a family present, like a board game if that is something they might play on the day, or a huge box of chocolate for everyone to share.

After 5 years together does your do not just put your name on the tag? That’s what we do.

I've always done wine or other alcohol or chocolates for adults and a card with a tenner in for kids.

Does your partner turn up with wine and chocolates at least, when he's at your family's house?

We are hosting and no he doesn’t take wine chocolate etc

Just stick your name on his gift tags?

As you're hosting I'd expect them to bring wine or dessert etc. In an established relationship I would expect him to just put your name on gifts, not for you to suddenly start buying them your own gifts, regardless of who hosts.

You may buy your family presents and he buy his, but aren't they treated as from both of you?

If you are hosting its easier, I would buy something simple wrap it tag it and stash it in your bedroom. If they turn up with gifts for you..tada…if they dont…return them

I would assume we'd put both names on all gifts after so long together..

If you are going as a guest to his family, then take goodies to share, such as nice wine and chocolate.

After 5 years I would think Christmas gifts would be from both of you, also whoever is going to visit for Christmas Day should also bring wine and or chocolates.

As soon as me and partner started living together any presents from me to my family were considered to be from both of us and vice versa for us.

Presents are from both of us, but I don’t get involved in my partner’s family’s presents. We each do our own family, which for me means sending a tenner to my nephews. I can’t be bothered with adult presents but his family are all into it and it’s a bloody chore. It’s his problem though.

Gifts for the host like chocolates and wine als it's bad manners to turn up for dinner without a gift.

Agree don't start off buying individual presents.

I would take flowers /plant, large box of the most expensive chocolate I could afford, booze... Red wine /white wine /champagne /prosecco...

As you're hosting I wouldn't buy them anything but I also think it's a hot odd that his presents aren't from you too

This is weird.. We give joint presents to DH family and my family from us both?! Why would you be separate!

Definitely weird if after living together for three years you don't do joint presents, even if you buy for your own families separately surely you put both names on them?

You are hosting, it could be like a party favour. I would not give more than that. What about a small memento like a tree ornament at each place setting? You could put them in a cracker at their plate!

Dont start a tradition of consumerism if it is not even there in the first place. Enjoy the no obligation Christmas id say !! :)