Page 17 | To ask the worst behaviour at Christmas you’ve witnessed by an adult?

SoniaFouler · 2021-12-05T18:58:27+00:00

Mine is: Drunk cousin (24 at the time) shouting and arguing with everyone for most of Boxing Day three years ago, then topped it off when someone told her to stop being stupid by standing up and scraping the entire contents of her dinner plate all over the table and made my aunt cry.

TinselTinsel · 06/12/2021 23:07

My ex threating to kick the sh*t out of me while 7 months pregnant because an ex male colleague text me on Christmas Day to say Merry Christmas and I had the cheek to reply "you too". I called a taxi and left him to explain to his parents why I had disappeared!

moolady1977 · 06/12/2021 23:07

Not any where near as bad as some of those stories but I remember the year I got back in contact with my sperm donor we got invited over on boxing day (dmum birthday so a big no ) so went on 27th instead got them all thoughtful gifts adding at least £150 on to the present budget , from the donor and his wart I got a pair of cheap earrings that sent my ears green and my exh got socks the dc got jamas and a selection box and from my nan I got nothing and the dc got a sweet tube each which wouldn't have bothered me if they hadn't made such a big show about what they got the other kids,grand and great grandkids . It took me back to being a dc when my nan one year bought me and my two sisters a pack of vests between us and my cousin a Tonka truck , it never happened again I got the dc to make them gifts until I went nc with them

xmaswiththeinlaws · 06/12/2021 23:26

DH has a very big family. Years ago, FIL got very drunk on Christmas Day, visiting his brother, returned home. staggered across room, grabbed the 7ft Christmas tree to stabilise himself. Whole tree came crashing down, smashing every single glass decoration which had the knock- on effect of causing a huge family row about who had let him get so drunk etc etc. (DH was designated driver but MIL went with them). I escaped to a back room to cobble together a replacement angel for the tree as a peace offering (very Blue Peter style). Few craft materials to hand, angel ended up being made from beer can, empty plastic bottle, baby wipe and embroidery thread. Looked remarkably effective considering.
Every time we have been (which isn't many Christmases as they live abroad) there has been some kind of drama. First trip for Christmas for 17 years planned for 2 weeks time, our kids have never spent Christmas with them. Pretty sure this year may top it as the whole family are supposed to be together for the first time probably since then and they don't all get on at the best of times.

RobinPenguins · 06/12/2021 23:57

We went to the in laws for Christmas Day. BIL was living there at the time, had been out on Christmas Eve, got coked out of his brain and god knows what else, did not get out of bed at all on Christmas Day. So a house full of people downstairs celebrating Christmas, and a grown man upstairs who didn’t appear at all, not even to come and see his own child after he was dropped off in the afternoon by his mother. Trying to explain to a 5 year old why their daddy can’t even get out of bed and walk downstairs to see them on Christmas Day left MIL in tears and absolutely mortified. This was about 5 years ago and BIL continues to be an absolute shit but I haven’t (to my knowledge!) been in the same house as him since.

Hawkins001 · 07/12/2021 00:24

@Ilikecheeseontoast

Most of these are hilarious and some of them absolutely CANNOT BE TRUE!!!

When you are past the mask so to speak, people's minds, can certainly be intriguing and 😲 perspectives at times,

Lizzy1980 · 07/12/2021 00:41

@Laila747

I was at my Ex (thank god) in-laws on Christmas Day about 9/10 years ago. My DD (from a previous relationship) was with us and we sat down to open presents from their side of the family. My 2 younger DC had piles of gifts, Ex MIL & FIL had piles of gifts, my ExH and his brother had piles of gifts, I had 1 or 2 and my DD had none, nothing, not a single selection box, bag of sweets, nothing. Not one single member of their family had bought my DD(10) a single thing. I remember my heart sinking as I watched her helping her brother and sister opening their presents.

I chucked my gifts back under the tree and left, with my DD. I felt awful leaving my other DC there but they were happy opening their presents. Me and DD walked and chatted and called in to see various people around the village. She never mentioned having no presents from them.

When we got back they all looked puzzled and I took my ExH aside and said we wanted to leave and I wasn’t prepared to stay somewhere where my DD (who they’d known for around 6/7 years at this point) was forgotten about. He said I was overreacting and that she’d had enough stuff from my family.
Ex MIL got wind of our conversation and told me quite clearly that my DD had her own family to buy her presents.
We left.
We divorced.
I haven’t spoken to his rancid ditch pig of a mother since. (and my DC hate her now too)

That's terrible. How could they exclude a child like that. Sounds like your daughter was very mature in how she dealt with it, helping the others to unwrap their gifts etc. What a lovely girl. She must have been very hurt

Colbinabbin · 07/12/2021 00:41

My XH getting pissed Christmas Eve in the early afternoon and when found out we weren't going back to the pub that evening as we were hosting 35 for lunch Christmas Day, proceeded to kick me, my two kids and my parents out at 7pm.
Dad and I trying to reason with XH whilst my mum had my DD in her car playing music to try and shield her. My 10 month old DS on my hip and XH chests me into the glass doors whilst dad trying to hold him back. This went on for two hours.
XH eventually passed out, we all came back inside and wrapped the presents, for kids to bed and prepped for lunch the next day.
XH get up late like nothing has happened, plays host of the year. Dad takes me aside quietly and we plan my escape from that abusive foul man; still took me 12 months to leave.

Labellex · 07/12/2021 00:52

My dad got battered on Xmas day and announced infront of the whole family it was a good thing DH likes rugby as I’d apparently got so fat he could hide behind me in a scrum (I was a size 12-14 with a history of ED) I spent the rest of the day in the garden in the freezing cold with a bottle of wine rather than be around him.

Pasithea · 07/12/2021 01:30

My biological father turning me away on Christmas Day. Oh did I mention he’s a vicar

ClaudiaJ1 · 07/12/2021 02:29

My uncle. A bit of a strange man. And never buys anyone anything. I presented him a gift mum and I bought, he carried on about how he felt bad because he hadn't got us anything, and despite being unemployed went on about how he's still paying taxes, tossed his present on the sideboard and said he'd open it later.

Never acknowledged what he got or thanked us later. I felt really hurt and sad, so did mum. It really soured the day for us. I have never made the mistake of buying anything for him ever again. And never will.

Nyfluff · 07/12/2021 03:34

I spent 13 hours flying to visit my older boyfriend who was working abroad. I was in poor health, but rather than collect me in the rental car, he told me to catch a bus from the airport to the hotel (that i'd paid for) as he had other plans! Not long after he beat me up and left me there for the rest of my holiday alone, I was a scared teenager and had never been to that country in my life. I thought it was going to be a romantic Christmas break that I put so much time and money into, but I was left alone and devastated at how callous he was. I spent New Year battered and bruised in a penthouse suite wondering how I'd fallen in love with someone so awful.

Turned out he wasn't working, he had another family there but spent 8 months of the year with me. I still don't really like Christmas or New Year.

Whyyyyyyyohhhhhwhyyyyyy · 07/12/2021 07:24

I was 11, my parents had split up and my dad was living alone before moving in with his harlot affair, went to said harlots for boxing day dinner, my dad, the harlot and the harlots kids got a nice freshly cooked meal, I got soggy reheated Christmas Dinner, which had been in the microwave less than a minute to reheat.... I was violently ill that night, the harlot (I will never call her stepmum) poisoned me 100% purposefully gave me food poisoning. Never spoke to her since and I'm in my 30s, I'm LC with my dad as well because he's a spineless twat.

Gargellen · 07/12/2021 07:30

Christ almighty. Some of these! I though things were shit for us the year the Christmas pudding went mouldy and we had to have Viota fairy cakes hastily made from a packet instead and I'm from the projects.

Presents down stairs, people shitting in others beds, drink, drugs and locking themselves in cars bellowing abuse. I love it! Thanks for creating this thread OP.

Marylou62 · 07/12/2021 07:41

@Laila747

I was at my Ex (thank god) in-laws on Christmas Day about 9/10 years ago. My DD (from a previous relationship) was with us and we sat down to open presents from their side of the family. My 2 younger DC had piles of gifts, Ex MIL & FIL had piles of gifts, my ExH and his brother had piles of gifts, I had 1 or 2 and my DD had none, nothing, not a single selection box, bag of sweets, nothing. Not one single member of their family had bought my DD(10) a single thing. I remember my heart sinking as I watched her helping her brother and sister opening their presents.

I chucked my gifts back under the tree and left, with my DD. I felt awful leaving my other DC there but they were happy opening their presents. Me and DD walked and chatted and called in to see various people around the village. She never mentioned having no presents from them.

When we got back they all looked puzzled and I took my ExH aside and said we wanted to leave and I wasn’t prepared to stay somewhere where my DD (who they’d known for around 6/7 years at this point) was forgotten about. He said I was overreacting and that she’d had enough stuff from my family.
Ex MIL got wind of our conversation and told me quite clearly that my DD had her own family to buy her presents.
We left.
We divorced.
I haven’t spoken to his rancid ditch pig of a mother since. (and my DC hate her now too)

Got tears in my eyes reading this... But love the rancid ditch pig description...! Something similar happened one Xmas except myself and my older brother got presents but my 3 younger brothers got none. (all full siblings.. Not that it should make one iota of difference) . My GM was an alcoholic who hated my Mum.. She refused to acknowledge the last 3 children after getting her 'heir and spare'... My dad took us all home after taking away our presents... I still have the memories of being absolutely distraught as I wanted the twin dolls so much, but knowing it was the right thing to do... I was about 6 years old... It instilled a good sense of fairness into me... But I've never forgotten those dolls...

Marylou62 · 07/12/2021 07:43

@Theywalkamongstus

My ex-boyfriends father sexually assaulted me on Christmas day. He waited until everyone was out of the room and then did it.

I'm so so sorry... Hugs for you... X

Jammysod · 07/12/2021 07:58

MIL travelled across country to stay with us on Christmas Eve. DH picked her up from the train station, but on the way back she started bitching about my parents (who had invited us for Christmas dinner) & having a strop. I only found this out after she'd swanned in the house like nothing happened, leaving DH distraught in the car.
She then refused to acknowledge what she'd done, decided she was going home & had the audacity to ask DH to take her back to the train station. She got the bus to the station and spent Christmas alone.
She still comes at Christmas unfortunately, so we spend the whole time on pins worried about a repeat performance.

ufucoffee · 07/12/2021 08:06

@Labellex

My dad got battered on Xmas day and announced infront of the whole family it was a good thing DH likes rugby as I’d apparently got so fat he could hide behind me in a scrum (I was a size 12-14 with a history of ED) I spent the rest of the day in the garden in the freezing cold with a bottle of wine rather than be around him.

Presuming battered means drunk. At first I thought you meant your father had been beaten up

RantyAunty · 07/12/2021 08:08

It's so very sad how disturbingly violent, abusive, and drunken some of the stories are.

I'm feeling a bit more grateful my Christmas is usually spent alone.

Bogeyes · 07/12/2021 08:17

@Ilikecheeseontoast

Most of these are hilarious and some of them absolutely CANNOT BE TRUE!!!

What sort of world do you live in? You need to mix a bit more and see what goes on in real life.

LaplandLucy · 07/12/2021 08:30

@Bogeyes child abuse, violence and rampant alcoholism are not real life. Nearly all the parents n this thread should’ve been reported to social services

Nishkin · 07/12/2021 08:31

@Marylou62 I absolutely love your Dad. What a giant of a man. He probably hated your distress but bore it. Something in my eye!

EmbarrassingHadrosaurus · 07/12/2021 08:34

[quote LaplandLucy]@Bogeyes child abuse, violence and rampant alcoholism are not real life. Nearly all the parents n this thread should’ve been reported to social services[/quote]
I'm not being trite when I say that is real life for a substantial number of people.

Social Service are overwhelmed and have been for decades, there is no capacity to take in everyday bleakness and coercive control of the sort described in so many places in this thread. (Child abuse is a very different matter.) Violence is never acceptable and it is a regular feature of life for too many people.

NdujaWannaDance · 07/12/2021 08:39

It's so very sad how disturbingly violent, abusive, and drunken some of the stories are.

I know. I feel like I must exist in a parallel universe, reading this thread.

I'm feeling a bit more grateful my Christmas is usually spent alone.

I'm feeling grateful for my family. DH's side are all lovely and straightforward. My adult children are all pleasant and functioning normally and though they bicker at times they don't try to take lumps out of one another, or out of us.

My parents are/were slightly odd, self absorbed and emotionally illiterate and they've both done some pretty selfish things over the years but at least they aren't violent and don't behave like something out of Shameless.

I'll be honest, there are also one or two posts on here that make me a bit and I'd dearly love to hear the other side of the story. I wouldn't say they are lies exactly, but I do think some people have a very warped or selective memory and manage to conveniently edit out their own awful behaviour in their version of events.

I imagine hearing the other side would add some much needed balance, because as awful as some people can be, some of these don't quite add up for me.

BillyAndTheSillies · 07/12/2021 08:48

DH has a very strange family dynamic. MIL very much matriarch, four DS's and the wives are very much second class citizens.

BIL had been chucked out by SIL and lived with IL's for the best part of a year. They rekindled a few weeks before Christmas and she rocked up unannounced on Christmas Day.

IL's had us all sitting down in the living room and as is tradition, the boys were all presented with the same matching brand of swim shorts that they get every year. I was presented with a matching sarong and some cash. SIL and another girlfriend were given cash. SIL storms out screaming that she demands to be treated like a wife, not a girlfriend. For once MIL doesn't respond, and I actually felt sorry for her because when she bought the gifts they weren't even together and she hadn't even been told she'd be coming to Christmas dinner. It was a shit show.

BIL had confided during their breakup/separation that we shouldn't buy gifts for her not on an approved list anyway as she just takes anything she's given to the charity shop.

They've been NC with the family for most of this year, I'm just waiting for the awkward moment on Christmas Day when they turn up for their gifts.

getsanta · 07/12/2021 09:13

[quote LaplandLucy]@Bogeyes child abuse, violence and rampant alcoholism are not real life. Nearly all the parents n this thread should’ve been reported to social services[/quote]
Of course it's real life. It's real life for a huge number of people. My sister and niece are living it as we speak. Just because it has r affected you doesn't mean it is someone's reality.