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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What makes a great house party

28 replies

Dazedandconfused2021 · 05/12/2021 16:02

I have a big birthday coming up. DH has suggested a small house party. Maybe 20 guests. My birthday is in the depths of winter so no option to have any of the party outdoors other than smokers using the patio area. I'm unsure, only because it's been about 15 years since I threw a house party and back then as long as they was the alcohol didn't run out, everyone had a great time. I'd want it to be a great party so aibu to ask for your opinions on what makes a great house party? Would we hire a singer for so few people? Can you get cleaning firms to come in and set up then clear away? My birthday falls on a weekend and due to other commitments it'd have to be the day of my birthday and I don't want to spend that day setting up a party then clearing up with a hangover!

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MakkaPakkas · 05/12/2021 16:06

I had a cocktail bar for my 40th. They turned up at our house, set up the bar, made delicious cocktails for everyone for about 4 hours and then tidied up after themselves. It was great!

PinkBathroom · 05/12/2021 16:08

The parties/occasions I like the best are informal - hosts are welcoming and easygoing, loads of booze and a few nice bits from Marks and loads of crisps. Good music that makes people want to dance. Good lighting - fairy lights etc.

I personally don't like over formal parties/weddings/occasions. Set the tone yourself with how you interact with everyone. Don't get precious about your home either!

Avarua · 05/12/2021 16:08

Murder mystery party!? You hire someone to facilitate the party. Fun.

PinkBathroom · 05/12/2021 16:08

Yes, cocktail bar is a great idea!

magicstars · 05/12/2021 16:10

Plenty of food, drinks & people who have stuff in common & upbeat music!

Dazedandconfused2021 · 05/12/2021 16:12

I hadn't even thought of a cocktail bar. I'll look into it! I'm feeling a lot more positive about it now after these responses. All the friends I would invite are great people although they're not all from the same circle I'm sure they'd get on great. We would have lots of drink and food (I'm a bit of a feeder!) So as long as we get the lights and music right it sounds like it'd go well!

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Dazedandconfused2021 · 05/12/2021 16:13

What about a roulette table hire? Or is that tacky??

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RuggerHug · 05/12/2021 16:23

Sing star or similar with disco lights if you're willing to give an entire room to it.

BillywigSting · 05/12/2021 16:31

Last house party I went to was a couple of weeks ago, for a friend's 31st, hosted by another mutual friend.

Honestly the thing that made it great was the people. We all brought our own alcohol (which we also then freely shared with each other). Ordered a load of pizza and wings and raided our hosts Spotify.

We all just milled about, some of us in the kitchen, some in the hall, some in the living room. Lots of mingling. All just generally having a good gab and a drink and a good time. Dress code was none existant. Some in party clothes, some in pj's. Absolutely no judgement either way.

It didn't end until about 4am but no one ended up legless drunk, just pleasantly merry.

No cocktail bars, external people/companies or what I call 'forced fun' involved at all.

We're doing the same for nye and I'm really looking forward to it.

CanIPleaseHaveOne · 05/12/2021 16:34

I love parties at home.

Consider how people will move through the rooms, and help that flow. You want people to circulate so have a drinks table far from a desert table etc.

I find it is better to keep it simple - cut down on choice but increase quality.

Have plenty of places for people to set down empty plates, napkins, glasses etc. Ditto, arrange enough seating, some of it a "quiet corner."

Hire a few teens to "manage" the floor on the night - remove the dirty plates and glasses, run the dishwasher, replace ice, etc. Keep the place from looking increasingly ragged. This will be the best money spent. Have a simple, clear set of expectations. Do a run through the day before with them. They will have a hoot and you can really enjoy yourself. You will be very thankful the next day!

A large floral display or two really gives a lot. I do my mum's trick - a lot of long stem greens with one or two blooms. Inexpensive but stunning. However at this time of year you have the added benifit of Christmas and all that cheer!

A fun but lovely addition are naice bowls of colourful sweets - smarties/licorice allsorts, oranges with cloves in the skin smell divine, a pyramid of shiny red apples looks beautiful.

Have a lovely time op and happy birthday. Will you come back and tell us how it went?

YokoOnosHat · 05/12/2021 16:35

It not being in my house, or the houses within hearing distance of my house Grin

HesterShaw1 · 05/12/2021 16:35

Enough room for everyone to stand in the kitchen, of course!

Dazedandconfused2021 · 05/12/2021 16:36

@BillywigSting that sounds like the parties I used to have 🤗 I'd want something a bit more 'special' without sounding like an idiot. Most of us have young children so we like an excuse to get dressed up and don't get out often. I think that's what is making me feel nervous because I feel like it needs to be worth the babysitter arranging etc that my friends would have to do to attend.

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Dazedandconfused2021 · 05/12/2021 16:37

@CanIPleaseHaveOne I wish I knew you in RL 🤣 that sounds exactly what I'm after!

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Lasair · 05/12/2021 16:57

Lots of alcohol I think, good music- cleaners are a good shout! Wouldn’t hire a singer but a nice spread and food and invite good friends and it will be great!

percythewitch · 05/12/2021 17:02

Please don't hire a singer. Either everyone will have to stand still and watch/listen which isn't very party-like or they will carry on chatting and laughing over the singer which is just plain rude.

Kite22 · 05/12/2021 17:06

The thing that makes a great party is the people.

No, I wouldn't hire in any sort of singer, nor a roulette table.

Nice food and enough to drink but mostly nice people.

I LOVE the idea of a cleaner though so the work isn't on the pair of you. The other thing I'd spend money on is a caterer.

Chamomileteaplease · 05/12/2021 17:08

Another one saying no to a singer! Sounds awful

But some great ideas here Smile. Really hope it goes well.

ParkheadParadise · 05/12/2021 17:20

I love a house party.
I had my sisters 40th birthday party at my house.
I had plenty of food and drink. I did get someone to supply all the party food. I hired a candy cart and flower wall. I had paper plates, napkins and cutlery that was disposable it was easier to clean up, Decorated with balloons and banners. It does help if you have space to move around.
Best of all was the Music the theme was the 70s and the music had everyone up dancing. Most people were still there at 2am 🙈

Bigoldhag · 05/12/2021 17:23

Enough food and drink! Being good hosts too. I think also having the righ mix of loud and quieter people - too many of the first is too much competition to be heard, too many of the latter is boring!

sweeneytoddsrazor · 05/12/2021 17:43

Dear me this is MN. House parties are considered anti social behaviour and any noise after 7pm will be reported to the relevant council dept and logged with the police in case of escalation. Grin

Dazedandconfused2021 · 05/12/2021 17:46

@sweeneytoddsrazor 🤣🤣
Some great ideas! Thank you!

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Doomscrolling · 05/12/2021 17:49

I went to a great one where the food was from a fish and chip van they’d hired for the evening.

Skysblue · 05/12/2021 18:03

Not a singer! People will want to chat but talking over the singer feels so rude. And they’re always too loud. A carefully planned playlist is all you need.

I went to a great house party recently, they’d hired food stalls so you could get a guy to make pizza for you, a diff guy to make waffles with any topping, etc. A barista too. The pizza was a big hit!

Cocktail making session could be fun. I’d avoid anything where people are bossed about too much.

Skysblue · 05/12/2021 18:04

Also good parties are made by the host introducing people to each other - not in a demented Bridget Jones way, but just making sure people are mixing.