Friend with benefits.

[MelloYellow]

For reference we have both came out of marriages within the last year.I feel like a teenager not early 40s led awake thinking about this …..
I’ve known him a long time as someone I’d say hi too,he’s always fancied me but we’ve never spoken or met up until recently so I guess it was from a far.

We met up and I was clear i do not want another relationship,and he said EXACTLY the same.

So now it’s months on we are regularly having sex with is amazing but he calls me every day ,and messages me all night.He calls me babe,gorgeous,sweetheart etc and I can’t help but think he wants it to develop…. He said we make a great team,I was made for him etc…. Because we are so similar in so many ways.
Am I being unreasonable or am I getting into something a bit deeper here….

@ThousandsOfTulips he was a friend of a friend, does that count? 🤣

@feelsobadfeltsogood the sex is insane xx

Where are all these fwb found ffs?

@Lovemelongthai

Where are all these fwb found ffs?

Online dating. It'll take you five minutes to organise. There's millions of them. After all, no strings free sex is fairly attractive for many many men!

And women, I should say!

Your ex husband didn't destroy you.

Why not just take it slow and see what happens.

I've never got my head around FWB. Isn't it just a non-exclusive relationship?

[quote MelloYellow]@feelsobadfeltsogood the sex is insane xx[/quote]
I've caved and messaged mine back today 🤦🏻‍♀️ I just can't resist him he blows my mind

[quote Houseofvelour]@ThousandsOfTulips he was a friend of a friend, does that count? 🤣[/quote]
A FOFWB? Think you just coined a new acronym!

@ThousandsOfTulips it has a nice ring to it! 😂

@CouldThisReallyBe

I've never got my head around FWB. Isn't it just a non-exclusive relationship?

The whole "exclusivity" thing is a bit odd to me. Either you are in the romantic relationship (in which the default is that it's exclusive unless it's mutually agreed otherwise) or not.

If by "non-exclusive relationship" you mean the phase when you meet someone but haven't yet committed to a relationship, I think that is massively different to having a long-standing and respectful friendship where you know each other well, fancy each other and enjoy sex together, but both parties have no intention or desire for it to become a romantic thing or "progress" to anything else beyond that: no moving in, marrying, getting engaged, introducing each other to friends and family, and most importantly not expecting the other person to meet your emotional needs any more than any other friend would, to necessarily make time for you etc.

I think it's almost the opposite ot the early stages of modern dating where people say they are "non-exclusive" in that it's all cards on the table, very honest and clear and with no expectation of change. Whereas dating is often people trying to impress or show their best self, trying to gradually integrate someone into other aspects of their life, romance, gestures, and fundamentally a hope that this will develop into something else, that things will develop and change. The idea of FWB is that that should NOT happen, or that will ruin it!

@ThousandsOfTulips

Mine is a friend of my brothers with benefits

We may have started something here 😂

@Sillawithans well he destroyed my confidence ,broke my heart made me question my own sanity.

@MelloYellow in all honesty it sounds like you need time to heal from your ex. Being single and focussing on getting yourself back is probably what you need right now. Having a FWB with anyone right now might not be good for you.

@ImustLearn2Cook I think you are right
And no I’m definitely not recovered from my ex ,far from it x

@MelloYellow you’ll get there.

[quote feelsobadfeltsogood]@ThousandsOfTulips

Mine is a friend of my brothers with benefits

We may have started something here 😂 [/quote]
FOBWB?

[quote MelloYellow]@ImustLearn2Cook I think you are right
And no I’m definitely not recovered from my ex ,far from it x[/quote]
It's great that you recognise this. So many people rush on and then find themselves in another mess. I think a FWB setup is something that can only work from a position of security and clear boundaries etc so definitely a bad idea to start before you feel whole again, despite the temptation! You are being very wise in how you think about it, OP.

Don't let your ex take another second of your future. Mine was a grade a cunt who bet me up for 15 years. Will he get a second of my life now, will he bollox

I try not to @Sillawithans

As for FWB
I may of been over thinking as he told me today he was going to go on a date but had pulled out.. I said oh right!
He asked if it bothered me I said it didn’t he said my face said different.
Very childish really

i suddenly remembered this today

we now live together 😊

Brilliant news!

Love this update ❤️

Congratulations! What a lovely update to read.

That's great news hope you have a lovely Christmas 🎅