To want somewhere to live!!!! (preferably with some form of heating)

[noughty]

Ok; I'm not really asking AIBU but want to know if anyone has any suggestions that could help us. Have name changed as am embarrassed by the situation I find myself in. Builders have renedered my house unliveable at the mo, don't want to go into big details as it makes me feel like sobbing. I am trying to sort it out but know that we won't be back in till Feb at earliest. Still paying mortgage of course so not able to afford to pay a London rent on a second place til we can get back in. Meanwhile stayin at Mum's accross London; boiler has gone on her entire block of flats so no heating for who knows how long; it's already been a week. She's gone to stay with friends and me and 2 yr old DS are sleeping in tracky bottoms, socks and woolly jumpers and DH is squatting in our building site of a house looking knackered so he can be near work and also he's kind of had his fill of staying with his in laws now. May need to pursue builders through the courts, etc. etc. nightmare nightmare. Has been like this for two months, not living with DH, staying at Mums and getting in their way. Can't bear the thought of doin it another 2 months or more. Luckily we are going to jump in the car and go to friends up North for Xmas. Back Jan 4th. Wonder if anyone had any helpful suggestions re accomodation. Clapham or nearby. Any housesitting opportunities? We are very reliable and nice people (just having terrible luck!). Can give glowing references as have house sat an American family's home two years ago (before baby came along), fed their three dogs, watered their plants and even supervised some work they needed done on their house while they flew back to US for medical treatment for 4 months. Or maybe a landlord has a place that is in between tenants and could do us a deal on? Or you'd be happy to rent your home short term if you'll be out of town. Or maybe some nice family has a Granny flat we could stay in in exchange for rent or childminding. Am hanging out with my 2 year old every day so if it mean a place of our own would happily have another kid tag along with us. WE'd love to negotiate any deal as I am so desperate to have a little home now that is just us, me, DH and DS. We've had so much upheaval since DS was born I don't feel like my feet have touched the ground.

bumper doo dah

Did you work before you had ds? Was it something that you could do on a part-time/freelance basis now to make a little rent money? Let's face it, you'd have to find a forgotten Monet in your junk to pay more than a couple of hours' rent in London.

Is there any chance you could get one or two of the rooms ready by, say, mid-Jan and all camp there (you disappearing to playgroups etc during day)?

no help to you, but i also temporarily live with parents, in freezing house. to a certain extent, i know how you feel

Sweet of you to be in touch. Yeah, you're right about the Monet. I do freelance work but tbh since this nonsense all started I've been too distraught to get much work done and am spending so much of my free time seeking help for our prob with the house. I can't be sure it will have been made safe for us to go back in by mid Jan but as soon as it is I will be straight back in. Also trying to deal with getting work when I'm squatting at my parents and haven't got my little office space is tricky but I will have to get my head down and wrangle some jobs. Well, line some up for after Xmas anyway. God it just occured to me that if we had to rent a place for the full wack maybe I could sneak out in the evening when DH got home and just do any job I can find, like waitress or whatever. If it's evening then no need for childcare. I think my head is so full of the worry of it all that I can't focus on much else. It's like ,until I know what the solution is, and how much it's going to cost, and when it'll get done by, I just can't relax worrying about it. But I think I'm going to have to learn to relax with the whole "living in limbo" aspect of it all or else I'll be in a high state of anxiety for three months running and I'll give meself a stomach ulcer! Other people must have nasty unresolved situations in their lives and they still manage to put it aside and get on wuth the rest of life. Dh is great at putting things out of his mind, annoyingly so. The only time I chill is when I play with DS; he's such a cutie pie.

Hi Lizandlulu, sorry you're feeling the cold too. I thouht the heating had come back on at my folks but the radiators have gone cold again. Ds standing around in his jumper and coat doing jigsaws today-looked so cute.

I just read the thread about the Mum in Devon with the Cob house and the big damp problem and I feel for her; these old houses are nothing but a big pain in the backside. The next place I buy is gonna be pristine!! (and dull, beautifully dull)

we are applying for planning permission to build a house in my mum and dads back garden. there is plenty of room, and the actual building is already there, but having to live here while we await the councils decision. the house is victorian 3 storey and bloody freezing! we have an oil filled radiator in dd's room to stop the from getting frostbite!
if we do get planning then we will be able to build the house as we want it. i have no idea how i am going to do that is a cant decide what to wear in the morning, never mind paln a whole house, furnish and decorate it!

Yeah, once you have kids I think it leaves alot less room in your head for dealing with big projects. The last place we did up was ok, before having ds, because I had all the time in the world to wander around kitchen showrooms and browse magazines. Now it's fairly impossible to think straight about anything it seems! I hope you're ok at your parents as it sounds like it'll be a long project but what a fantastic opportunity to build your own place to your own design. That's a dream of my DH but frankly after this experience I really don't think I'll have the mental strength to face it!! It's been a year and a half living in squalar or temporary accomodation and I just want a little new build tiny flat now, heated carpeted, with a sink and a wardrobe!! Would be so interested to hear about your build when you start it. Have you written to Grand Designs? I just thank God that during this project i don't have a camera crew filming me sobbing and having a fit at DH!! How embaressing.

to be honest im not looking forward to it. i dont have the foggiest about design, or even decorating for that matter. the closest i have come to it was painting our first home, and that was only small. our second house was my dream home, but my dh became depressed after a burglary and didnt want to live there anymore, so here we are at my parents house.
my dd is a bit of a workaholic though and i can just see that all the decisions are going to have to be made by me and hewill have hardly any input to it at all

Lizandlulu: don't be sad about it, it sounds a fantastic opportunity (I am deeply ). Building one-off homes is the sort of thing most architects spend their whole career hoping to pull off so interview a load, discuss ideas (you must know if you want to do open plan or more traditional layout; a house that matches your parents' or stands apart etc) and see which one best dovetails with you. Read lots of magazines (Homebuilding & Renovating has loads of case studies of one-off homes) to get an idea of what designs appeal and the ups and downs of doing such a project.

God, I don't want to repeat myself, but I really am consumed with .

Sorry to hijack your thread noughty.

it actual building is already there. it is a 2 storey 4 car brick built garage. when my mums house was built, it was originally a vets, so the building was used as stables.
so we have limited space to work with.
i wish i could post pics of it on here and get everyones ideas about it.
my trouble is i like too many diferent styles and put together, just looks jumbled.
i want a modern kitchen, but classical decoration.
thats even if we get planning permission. im trying not to get my hopes up, as it may not even happen. we know no-one on the council, and these things seem to be more 'who you know' not what you know.
last year we applied to put a mobile home on a piece of my dads land, just in town, but the council refused as it is a brown field area.
tha land backs onto a factory, and has more houses further down the lane, fgs.
my family run a scrap yard, and the council were concerned we were going to start usuing at as another yard!
anyway dont get me started on that, i can go on for hours about the unfairness of it all!!
my dh wanted to write a letter to the bribes department of the council to see whos palm we had to grease!

who runs your mums flats? if its not the council then you need to get on to who owns them as it is against the law for landlords to leave tennants without haeting or hot water for any longer than 24hrs or they have to pay for the tennants to be re accomadated in a b and b till the problem is solved!! try ringing them and giving them 24hrs to fix the situation or tell them you will be taking legal advice! when i did that to my landlady after god knows how many cold showers and phone calls to her she sent a plumber within the hour!

councils seem to be able to get away with it though but you can still talk to cab about it or get your mum too! also im sure your mum wont mind if you re arrange some of her things to make her place safer for lo!

wont your buildings insurance pay for hotel for you? im sure ours said it did when we took it out but then again i dont really understand morgates and insurance i leave all that to my dp but ut might be worth looking into?

hope that you get something sorted soon it must be treally difficult esp at this time of year

Well, you can do some amazing conversions these days - the H&R Jan issue had a really good barn with good mix of modern and trad.

Planners can be so and sos but it's worth trying to speak to them and, if you think they are being completely irrational, you can appeal. (I thought you were supposed to encourage development on brownfield sites ).

Anyway, get an architect who will have, after all, spent seven years looking at buildings and deciding what the best thing to do with them is before s/he even qualified. They should also have spent time dealing with your planners so will know which boxes to tick. It means you will end up with a fantastic, cohesively-designed house - if pp comes through. Best of luck.

we have an architect man applying for planning permission on our behalf. we thouhgt this would give us the best chance of getting it, and he has already drawn up the plans which are to be submitted to the council.
we could have appealed when they refused us planning for a mobile home, and a councillor actually told my dad that they fully expected us to appeal. but we thought we had no hope in getting it from the reasons we were refused on.
it really frustrates me. why did they expect us to appeal? just to get some more money out of us i should think!
anyway, this architect is going to cost us around £1400 to apply for permission, so i hope we get it!

Micci25- my Mum's flats are freehold and all the flat owners are the joint freeholders so in effect i guess they are their own landlords?! The managing agents are to blame as they were warned 6 weeks ago that one pump had gone on the boiler and the other wouldn't last long doing all the work on it's own (for about 70 flats) Sure enough it packed up just over a week ago. The managing agents are being sacked. We got some semblance of heating back yesterday in some of the rooms. Thank God we are going away on Monday for Xmas-to DH's parents then up North to friends. Back early Jan and still on the case about finding somewhere for us to go.
Lala LL-No prob about hijacking the thread; it takes my mind off my own probs thinking about Liz's building project. Everyone else's projects are much nicer to fanatsize about than your own as the stress involved isn't mine! Perhaps we could all swap projects. How come you've done two projects in two years, Lala? Is that your thing? I have worked on other folks projects in the past and it's a whole differnet ball game when it's not your own home; I was able to deal with it without freaking! Looks like I won't have definate answers about our build dilema till early jan as a crucial element has just buggered off for Xmas. Almost a relief to know there's nothing I can do about it till jan.

LalaLL-Just managed to get through to the guy at Westbury. He was slightly miserable and said they wouldn't consider anything less than a six month stay. No short lets. Are you working on a project at the mo? You sound unfrazzled so I would guess the answer is you aren't!

Heating is back on; just had nice hot bath with DS. Got abit of a lead on an empty flat in Stockwell so will look into that. How exciting to be building your own. Probably not in London then I guess?

Sorry to hear about Westbury Ct - they used to do short lets so don't know why they have changed. On the plus side, it isn't a very nice block and you might well be longing to live on a building site after staying there a couple of weeks.

No, we have just finished doing up two flats - was absolutely frazzled while it was going on. There were loads of problems and it was very, very stressful so I do completely sympathise with you but I've done it a few times now and I would urge you to just get your head down and be absolutely ruthless about finishing it. As soon as you take your eye off the ball, the whole project starts to fall apart. You have to think of it as another child that needs your constant attention and will make ridiculous demands on your time and patience. Looking for somewhere else to live unless you are absolutely sure your parents will throw your bags on the street sounds a little bit like displacement activity .

Anyway, I live in Clapham myself and can get you pass you some numbers of some reasonably reliable tradespeople if you need to the project up and running again (not a plumber, all plumbers are devilspawn). So CAT me if you need any information.

Thanks Lala. Was getting my hopes up you might have a plumber until read the bit about Devilspawn! The plumber is the one thing we can't get hold of and need, of course! It might seem from my thread that I'm spending lots of hours faffing around about accomodation but that's cos the thread's topic was trying to point me in the direction of a cheap flat but in reality it's like 1% of my efforts. Most of the time is meeting tradespeople at the house and dealing with all the build; rest of the time is dealing with 2 year old. DH workin 12 hr days 6 days a wk at present so all down to me. Just know that us being in a little flat would restore some sanity and also my folks aren't even near Clapham so am travelling down there every morning to deal with the works. Will bear you in mind to CAT you when we need someone other than a damn plumber.

Thanks Lala. Was getting my hopes up you might have a plumber until read the bit about Devilspawn! The plumber is the one thing we can't get hold of and need, of course! It might seem from my thread that I'm spending lots of hours faffing around about accomodation but that's cos the thread's topic was trying to point me in the direction of a cheap flat but in reality it's like 1% of my efforts. Most of the time is meeting tradespeople at the house and dealing with all the build; rest of the time is dealing with 2 year old. DH workin 12 hr days 6 days a wk at present so all down to me. Just know that us being in a little flat would restore some sanity and also my folks aren't even near Clapham so am travelling down there every morning to deal with the works. Will bear you in mind to CAT you when we need someone other than a damn plumber.

On my last flat i did up the plumber, Norman, was leaving my flat and my neighbour came out and said to me "Why have you got Angry Norman round your flat?". I said 'He's the plumber; why's he called "Angry"?' The neighbour told me it was because he took apart the Duke of Cambridge pub with a sledge hammer! Sure enough on the last day of the job he went berserk at me and I ended up running out into the street and hiding behind the tiler who was out having a fag. Wonderful human beings, plumbers.

I might have a lead on a flat!! Also am going away for Xmas so can have a break from the dull slog of it all!!! Yippeee! Haven't done a road trip with a 2 year old before so should be interesting.Got Dh with me too of course so got some backup if tamtrems break out on the M6.

Just remembered that the plumber that came and sorted out mistakes made by other plumber seemed q decent (although jobs were relatively small - not installing new system or anything). But he turned up when he said he would (3 times!) and was polite and non-axe wielding so can give you his details shd you need them.

Happy Christmas

Thanks Lala I may get in touch about the plumber and probably other tradesmen along the way. Hope you have a lovely Christmas. If anyone thinks of any accomodation possibilities in the Balham, Clapham, Stockwell, Brixton, Battersea area over the holiday period I'd be very glad to hear about it!
Spending today wrapping pressies and filling out the forms for my Building insurance legal protection policy; how very festive! DH is working; hopefully not tomorrow though (or the next day!!) Have a good one.

Ok, a little update. Have found accomodation, a friend's flat who hasn't managed to find tenants is renting me it at mate's rate, yippee!!! Also found a housesit advertised on Gumtree which is for four weeks rent free!!! for housesitting and feeding a kitten!! I'll have few weeks in my mate's flat then move into the housesit. Shenanigans with builders still continues a pace- not a happy tale and nowhere near moving back into our house but these two lots of accomodation will give us breathing space. It sounds as if it'll be a long haul so anyone else needs a kitten feeding from Feb 16th onwards let me know as we'll be homeless again!! Here's hoping the kitten and the two year old get on...