to be pissed off with my SIL canceling at the last moment again?

[curlywurlycremeegg]

Just ranting really. A small group of mums meet up every Monday at different soft play areas for kids to play together. I always drive the furthest, between 45 and 60 mins to get there as I live miles away from the rest of them. DD (2.8) loves going and playing with her friends. We already knew that this week there would only be three of us as one mum had a mandatory training day at work, another had a scan booked etc, one of the mums called off this morning with a cold, so that leaves me and my SIL with the kids. She phones me just as I was about to set off saying so and so couldn't make it as she had a cold and as she (my SIL0 had "loads to do" and had only just got up she wasn't going to bother. Am now going to take DD and DS2 to another one nearer home but DD is upset as she wanted to play with her cousin. This isn't the first time she has done this and I am getting really pissed off, it feels like we aren't worth the effort of getting ready to go out but everyone else is. AIBU??

Or it might mean that your sil is more relaxed about cancelling with you because you're family, and perhaps more accepting of it?

yes I would be pissed off as well

can't believe you drive for 60mins to a soft play area!

mmm, well I'm not accepting of it at the moment I have tended to be forgiving of both my SIL's too much, I do like to think that everyone is "nice really". DS1 hasn't had a birthday present or card from either of them for the last two years and I feel so for him about it, if I had forgotten one of their kids then I would soon know about it [fblush}. I guess I am just having my eyes opened to it really and it upsets me that they just aren't very considerate of others circumstances.

ggirlsbells, I know there are loads nearer but DD gets loads more out of it when playing with other kids she knows and I don't really know anyone near me with kids her age.

just realised that my moaning has hit the big issue about this whole thing, guess I need to step back from expecting things from family members just because it is something I would do, feel a bit and deflated about it though

curlywurlycremeegg - if sil's usually fairly inconsiderate then YANBU!

The only thing you can do with family who upset is, as you say, to step back a bit. I have ishoos of various sorts with inlaws and the only way it doesn't bother me, is to kind of hold them at arm's length. Not to believe their promises and let things wash over me. (Not that I always succeed!)

Perhaps every now and then (once a month), the group could meet up nearer you, to make it a bit fairer?

angharad, thanks for that, I will try to let it "wash over me", I get more annoyed for the DC than myself as they are the ones who are let down, it's just inconvenience for me. Feel much more now, had a lovely day out with DD and DS2 and just been helping DD make her Christmas cards.