If you had time out of work and spare time. What would you do?

[charmingbat]

For health reasons and following a whole load of trauma, I’m stepping back from work with no job to go to. I’m under strict instructions to relax and my kids will be in childcare a few days a week. My problem is I don’t really know how to relax and what to do with this time? What do you do and how do you ensure you still feel fulfilled and don’t get bored? Sorry…not really an Aibu but grateful for any suggestions. I don’t really have any/many hobbies or talents. I read (but that’s linked to my trauma) and used to run (weather is rubbish though) and watch tv

Walking/running
Listening to music
Play piano
Yoga
Meditation
Massages
Read
Walk dogs at humane society
Journaling
Watch documentaries on things that interest me
Declutter

It really depends on what “relaxing” looks like to you!

My go to is baking! Though it's a bit crap being diabetic and not being able to eat most of it, but my DC are very grateful.

Photography is a great hobby too.... gets you outside and makes you more aware of things around you.

And walking my dogs makes me very happy.

Join a gym with a good pool - I love swimming.

Volunteering of some sort? Like befriending an elderly neighbour?

Just because you don't have hobbies now doesn't mean you can't take something up

If you like reading could you find a local book club?

I would

• take long walks and listen to podcasts
• join the gym and go to some classes (probably slower paced like yoga)
• volunteer if I could find something suitable
• take up a nice pamper routine like face masks/hair masks/doing your own nails once a week (get a shellac machine)
• try out new recipes
• re-decorate my house (easy stuff like painting)

Then I would try and find a hobby I enjoyed, it make take trying a few things before you find something that suits you

Running
Walking
Yoga
Volunteer for the foodbsnk

Most of the above alongside catching up with friends and really paying attention to them and their lives. Try learning something new, doesn’t matter if it doesn’t work out, some things stick others don’t.

Anything creative is very soothing. I was crap at ceramics but love piano.

Do you have a garden? I started gardening when I was off work for MH reasons and not only have I really enjoyed it but it's been great for my physical and mental health!

I'm in a similar boat. Usually I would run but currently injured so that's not helping.

I find it does help me to still have a bit of routine, so I get up at the same time daily and shower and dress. Slobbing about sounds relaxing but I find it makes me feel worse.

Then I spend an hour doing something useful. Again, not getting anything done doesn't help me.

After that the day's my own and I go for a walk, to the library, see a friend for coffee, get my nails done, read, do a yoga class. Nothing exciting but soothing.

I find getting outdoors every (most) day make a big difference.

I recently resigned without another job to go to because I was genuinely burnt out. I have an 8yo ds.

The first two weeks I spent mostly sleeping. I woke up just in time to get him ready and take him to school. Came home and would nap for a few hours, potter a little bit before picking him up and dealing with the evening until dp came home.

I now have a new post in the NHS but still waiting on a start date because nhs recruitment is utterly glacial.

I've read a lot, got back into learning Italian, done a deep clean and clutter clear, starting eating much better and more mindfully (much easier when stress levels aren't sky high). If the weather is reasonable I go for a walk. I've met friends and my mum for lunch /coffee. Watched a load of documentaries. Read a load of books in my tbr pile. Quite often I'll combine these - take a book I've been looking forward to reading to the coffee shop via a long walk, to be enjoyed at a leisurely pace accompanied by something delicious to eat and drink.

I will admit to being a bit bored sometimes and looking forwards to going back to work but this little time out has done wonders for both my physical and mental health

I started doing jigsaws puzzles in lockdown. I found it a really good way to switch off from everything else bar focusing on the task.

Gardening
Reading
Writing
Redecorating
Organising – decluttering, tasks I never get time for, like organising all my phone photos: deleting the crap and printing the good ones, tidying the shed and the under stairs doom cupboard

Crochet
Pottery (beginners class)
Sorting through the boxes in storage (occasionally, when I feel up to it)
Throwing things away (often!)
Choosing things to wear or look at (eg clothes, cushions) that make me feel happy
Writing a card or email to someone
Duolingo language learning

Oh yes and like a PP - jigsaws! They can, unexpectedly, be very therapeutic

Walks, even just to the local park. If it has a cafe then even better, walk around the park with hot chocolate. Listen to podcasts about subjects you enjoy.

Library- seek out the best one local to you. It’s easy to spend an hour or two picking up books, even if you don’t want to sit and read, it’s still a nice environment to be in. Quiet and calm.

Definitely swimming - if you can’t swim then just set a target of doing a couple of widths each time and build up. I find I have to concentrate so much that I have no capacity to think of anything else - it wears me out but in a good way.

Hiking - obvs weather dependant this time of year.

Jigsaw puzzles, cup of tea, few biscuits - podcast or playlists on in the background

I'd get back into my creative writing; make soap & other toiletries & household products; maybe start painting again; be more experimental with baking & cooking; & look at online courses.

I'd get properly back into swimming, it's time consuming and not really possible since kids.

Baking and I've also wanted to learn British sign language for a Long time so that's what I'd do. I've also got some macrame kits but not got round to trying so that would go on the list.

I'd love to have time to take a woodwork/joinery course. I see things I'd like to build in my home and simply dont have the skills or confidence (eg alcove storage).

I'd also like to do some form of exercise regularly eg a step class.

Sort my garden out, amateur dramatics and learn the double bass. Oh, and singing lessons.

@charmingbat I am 2 days into my first maternity leave from a stressful, active job. I am twiddling my thumbs too!!
So far I have:

• taken the dog out on a wandering walk to drop some paperwork off
• packed hospital bag
• done some cleaning
• made a beef stew

..I am about to go to the post office & collect the shopping! If I think about the ‘free’ time I feel very overwhelmed & want baby to come early so I’ve got a sense of purpose!
I’m trying to plan an activity in the morning and one in the afternoon each day for now. I like to keep busy! Other things on my plan this week:

• coffee with a friend
• festive drink meet up with colleagues
• get an Xmas tree & get the decorations out
• bit of my online birth course
• deep clean the house, tiny bit by tiny bit! (I’ve not started yet).

I’m also listening to podcasts & watching documentaries on bbc iplayer if I’m awake at silly o’clock etc.
Try and enjoy the time even if it doesn’t come naturally 🙂 xox

Gardening! So good for mental health.
Join a gardening group for a local area? Woodland group? Get an allotment? Re do your own garden - grow your own veg. Winter is the planning stage! Doing drawings planning what to buy- planting fruit trees.
It’s so good for trauma

Am I the only one who would watch Netflix all day
I hope you get a chance go relax and recharge, it sounds like you need it

Thank you. These are lovely ideas.
I like the idea of something active and I have always enjoyed jigsaw puzzles

What did you do before you had kids?

Personally, I'd spend a few days eating my body weight in junk food while watching Netflix. Then I'd spend lots of time on my Nintendo.

Nap

Following with interest as am currently off work with stress. Totally burned out I suspect I will be off for a few more weeks at least.

I journal
Go for walks on the beach
Afternoon naps
Call friends
Getting ready for Christmas (wrapping/ordering etc)
Decluttering
Reading
Eating healthily
Cut out alcohol
Early nights (yes, as well as afternoon naps, I am exhausted!)

I am building myself up to tackle The Cupboard of Doom.