Help

[Crackfox1323]

Hi - no judgment please. My friend is suicidal, she’s asked me if she attempts to take her life & fails, will her 2 children be taken from her? One is 7yrs, other is 4months.

I’m worried about her

Does she have family you can contact? Honestly if this were my friend, I’d be on my way round, getting her to a&e and seen by the crisis team.

No family, I visit her everyday.
Do social services automatically take children if parent attempts suicide? Even if they weren’t in house?

What does she think will happen to her children if she succeeds?

Is it possible this is a cry for help rather than an intention to die? Is there any way you could convince her to ask for help?
Her children won't be taken off her because she needs some help.

@Crackfox1323

No family, I visit her everyday. Do social services automatically take children if parent attempts suicide? Even if they weren’t in house?

It sound harsh, but who does she think will look after her children if she succeeds? She needs help, and if she is talking about suicide in this way then she needs help right now.

This is surely the least of the worries - is she getting any medical support?

It’s a lot more complex than that. Her children will be taken away if she is deemed to be a physical or emotional risk to them.
Op, is this really about a friend? 💐

Some good advice here:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2469253-Suicide-attempt-Social-Services

Hi / this is where there were two parents so one will always look after kids. My friend is a single parent … she wants to know if she survives attempt what will happen with kids? Go to live with their dad?

And given to their dad?
Yes it’s about a friend

If this was my friend I wouldn't be on the internet asking questions like this. I'd be phoning an ambulance/the police for her.

When we did our wills with my DH, what motivated me to do was the fact that if I did not have named people as next of kin my children could betaken in to care.

If this is the thing that stops your friend then maybe that’s a good sticking player while she gets better care?

She needs to speak to the crisis team

You really really need to ask her what happens to them if she succeeds.

The fact that she is considering the fact it might fail and sees a future with herself still being alive and what her circumstances will be then, means this is a cry for help. Please do something to help stop her. Contact the police or a crisis team. She wants you to stop her otherwise she would not have told you. She has trusted you to find her help, get her the help she needs.

Also, if she is worried that making people in authority aware she is feeling suicidal will get her kids taken away, it won’t. She needs help.

Someone I know tried to kill themselves a few years ago and her child was taken away from her and put into the care of the father, she did eventually get her child back but it was a major battle to do so.
If she contacts someone and says this is how I feel and gets help they won't be. This is the route she needs to take, please stress that to her.
I have been there and the only thing that stopped me was the thought of what it would do to my kids if I went through with it, the thought that they would think my mummy didn't love me enough.
Good luck with getting her to seek help, and to your friend she isn't alone, there are people who can help and it does get better, she just needs to hold on, hug her babies and get help. ❤ ❤

Does she have a plan ? Has she shared with you any details of plans to do it or is it more just a cry for help?

Has she attempted this before?
And is she under any mental health team/counselling right now ?

We cant possibly know in what situation the children would go where.

Not a priority right now. I dont think anyone could answer this with certainty.

If my friends experience is anything to go by then no. She was sent home with her DS after attempting suicide. She was told to use a sterile knife next time in case of infection. SS didn't give a fuck. It was a cry for help. She was desperate.

Please encourage your friend to get help. There is some there. If someone can help her fight for it.

She was told to use a sterile knife next time in case of infection

The hospital advised her to harm herself the next time with a sterile knife ???!

@Notimeforaname

She was told to use a sterile knife next time in case of infection

The hospital advised her to harm herself the next time with a sterile knife ???!

Yep! Madness I know.

Information may be outdated but in a similar situation years ago the advice was if the suicidal person attempted or made several threats to harm it may assist the separated parent seek to become the resident parent due to fears of inability to care for the children appropriately and can be used as reasoning in a custody battle.

Knowing this information was enough to stop my relative from harming and she hasn't made any attempt or threat since. She has been low but always communicates this and uses medication where necessary. Not sure if it's the same situation now.