To ask if you had a "half" sibling growing up how did you find it?

[Borderline31]

Just curious, I'm a step child myself but neither of my parents ever went on to have more children so I never had to experience having a half sibling in one or both homes.

I am now a step mother and mother to my DSCs "half" sibling.

My husband has mentioned in the past he worries that his children will feel sad at being the only ones who have to go between two homes whilst his and his exes other children do not. There have been no issues that have been outwardly obvious, DSC seem like happy children and absolutely adore their new sibling(s).

But i'm curious, what was your experience and why do you think you felt that way?

I only had half siblings (7 in total!) and no full siblings. It was a bit weird when I had to go to my dads for Xmas and my mum and stepdad and half siblings (who I lived almost full time with) had Xmas without me. But I never knew any different so it didn’t scar me or anything.

Saying that, I’ve always been absolutely adamant that I wouldn’t want that for my own kids. So maybe it upset me more than I thought?

There’s not much you can do about it though, just make sure you arrange lots and lots of special things that involve all the kids and keep time with the resident kids low key.

My Dad told me about my half sister when I was 13 and he's had too much to drink.
Sad back story as it was with his first girlfriend (and real love of his life) and she was shipped off to a home for unmarried mothers and forced to have the baby adopted as they were 16 and 15 years old.

Two failed marriages later... he met the first girlfriend at an old school reunion, married and started to search for their daughter. 4 years later, they found her and we all met up. She's 5 years older than me, had a lovely adoptive family and she's lovely. Now lives in the USA , and my DD2 and I stayed with her when we went travelling together.

So our story had a happy ending!

It's fine. I have an older half brother (same mum) and a younger half sister (same dad). My brother lived with his dad and step mum and he stayed with us on weekends. We loved it and had so much fun. He never came on holidays with us but he would go away with his dad a lot so it evened out I suppose.

I've never really had a great relationship with my sister though. My dad was very very sporadic with visits and we could go months without seeing him. She's 15 now and I haven't seen her in years, I fell out with my dad over 2 years ago and we haven't spoken since, it must be about 3 years since I last saw my sister

All my siblings are half siblings and tbh I always felt on the cusp of both families.

My parents battled for me in court and I can hand on heart say it was all about the maintenance as neither gave a shit about me when I was actually in the house. I think this had a knock on effect with me and my siblings as I wasn't part of that family unit. I do not have a close relationship with any of them which is sad as my three dc are incredibly close.

I have 2 full siblings, 2 step siblings and 1 half brother. Normally I just say I have 5 siblings. I don’t really differentiate.
I’ve always been really close with my half brother.

My family is very big on the idea that family isn’t your DNA.

Hated it tbh. He had both his parents together while I had one biological parent. Funnily enough he was the favourite and golden child while I was the disappointment

I have 3 full brothers, a younger half brother and sister from my father and a younger half brother on my mums side. I lived with my younger half brother on my mum’s side and to be honest he feels just like my other brothers, although he’s the baby as there is a 12 year gap.

I don’t keep in touch with my other half siblings. I saw them at weekends when I was younger, then my father moved to France with them when I was a teenager. I am NC with my father. I don’t really feel any connection to them.

I have two full siblings and one half sibling (youngest) - I was 18 when she was born so never lived with her, but we have a great relationship now

She's just my little sis. Just as my eldest is big brother to his siblings.

My younger brother - but we lived together basically full-time so he's just my brother. I don't have any "full" siblings but don't think I'd feel differently.
I only saw my dad once or twice a month though. The only slightly awkward thing was when I stayed with my paternal grandparents at half-term & explaining why he couldn't come too. I guess in hindsight he may have felt left out then - but there was quite a big age gap so we wanted to do different things in the holidays anyway, & he would see our maternal grandparents or get one on one time with our mum.

I have a half-sibling, we have the same mum and grew up in the same home. I don’t see them as a ‘half’ sibling at all, just a sibling.

However DH has half-siblings from his dad who are 15+ years younger than me, have never lived with him and the sibling dynamic just isn’t there, they’re more like his nieces or nephews.

*than him

I have 2 half siblings from my dad that are 10 and 23 years younger than me. I don’t consider them siblings, they are just my dads other children. They grew up in the same household with my dad, have shared family friends, went to the same school so know people there and went travelling with my dad when he worked away whereas I visited for the day/ weekend every few months when my dad had time for me.

I love all my 'half' siblings just as much as my full siblings. BUT - I wouldn't want my own children to have to go through it. I always felt on the outside of both families and I still do. I've never said it to either parent. I think if they had made more of an effort to overcome the obvious differences maybe I'd feel differently. The fact that you are giving it some thought is a really good sign.

I grew up with 3 older half siblings, mums from her first marriage. Then it's just me from her second. They always said I was just like a full sibling and treated me as such most of the time. I love them all but always felt left out. Certain things happened over the years to do with their dads family and I never felt part of it. They were that much older I was always left out of conversations etc. I've grown up very insecure. Could be something else that's caused that but I've always blamed feeling like an outsider all my life.

I have younger half brother and sister through my dad. To be honest I have a lot of hate towards them and I know it’s not their fault. It was very difficult to know my dad was such a good dad to them and really did not have time for me. They are now in their twenty’s and it’s still hard because I see my dad helping them with house deposits and paying for my half sister wedding, decorating her house while he still does nothing for me.

My older brother and sister have a different father to me so technically they're a half sibling but they're just siblings to me. They didn't have a relationship with their father and they have never met their other 4 half sisters. My dad eventually adopted them both to make it legal. As we've grown older they're not at all close with each other and don't really get on but I do have a great relationship with them both individually.

I have 4 half siblings. My Dsis from DM and DSD, and 3 others from my DF.
I’m quite a bit older than all of them but very close to my Dsis. She will always be my baby sister and we’re very different but get on very well! I have 3 kids all with the same dad and she doesn’t want any. I fully respect her choice but secretly would love to be DAuntie lol. I don’t see her as a half sister at all. She’s my sister.
My others sibs are all over the country. We don’t really keep in touch apart from the odd occasion when I see my DF and one or two of them will also be there, but never all 3! I don’t think they mind and I certainly don’t. I wish them happy birthday or congratulations and like their social medias but they all grew up together and I respect their bond. I don’t want anything from them, but I mean that in the nicest possibly way. They owe me nothing

I have 4 half siblings, but to me they are just my brother and sisters. It literally doesn’t matter.

I have two half siblings and no full siblings. Both were late teens/early twenties when I was born so neither were at home anymore.

It was great! They would babysit me periodically which was always good fun as they usually took me to McDonalds. They always seemed so grown up to me but in a cool young way, not like my parents.

The only downside was that people would get confused about our family set up - they were often mistaken as my Dad and my Dad as my grandfather. I became aunt at 13 months old. I look more like my niece and nephews' sister than their aunt.

As I don't have full siblings I don't have a basis for comparison. I have a good relationship with their mum - we go for lunch and shopping sometimes and she used to babysit me sometimes - it's nice because sometimes it feels a bit strange that we have half a family in common and each have half a family not in common.

4 half siblings.
Grew up with 2 and we have a great relationship and as far as I'm concerned, both full siblings. However, I was always treated differently by their dad and his family. We get on, we're reasonably close but I am alot older than them.

I don't know my other two half siblings.

Do.i feel like I don't belong? Yes. In both families. But I have my own family now, so I put all my effort into that. I would hate for my DCs to feel the way I did (and do) now.

3 half siblings. We are not close at all. I kind of view them the same as cousins.

I have a younger half sibling (same mom). We grew up together but I dislike him intensely. We didn't know we were half siblings as we thought we had the same father. My mom divorced him when we were both young. There was favouritism though from my uncles as they didn't have anything to do with me but took him on trips and holidays all the time. Realised why when we discovered we had different fathers.

Two brothers - one full, one half (same mum). Honestly, it never occurs to me. I'm five years older than my half brother and my mum brought the three of us up on her own. Both mine and my younger brother's dads are shit though - perhaps if the dynamics had been different in terms of our relationships with our respective fathers (say, if my mum had married my little brother's dad) it would have been different.

I don't think you can assume the nature of a sibling relationship based solely on whether they're full, half or step siblings. The unique makeup and dynamic of the rest of the family is much more relevant, in my experience.

I have 2 full siblings & 3 younger half siblings (same dad).

Growing up I was close to all of them but especially my half brother who unfortunately passed away in his teens and I lost another half brother a few years ago.

Now I'm very close to my half sister but not so much my full brothers.

As kids we were always referred to as the big three & the wee three but there were never any differences made - I think it helped that my parents lived in close proximity, remained civil & we had no set contact/residency schedule so just went back & forth as & when we pleased with my stepmum doing the bulk of the childcare while my parents worked (how she managed I'll never know as we were ages 8,6,5,3,2,1).

My mum has just had an op & can't be left on her own & it's my half sister who has been sitting with her to let me get out for a break.