To ask how you did any housework when you had small children

[RosettaR]

I have twins who are 8 months and for various reasons not much support other than my husband who works full time. They have eczema so I really need to keep dust levels down and get rid of any mould. But even finding 5 minutes in a day to do some hoovering or dusting seems impossible. They are currently not napping without me or my husband there. They have moments of being quite chilled and happy to play but that gets taken up by basic things like washing and sterilising bottles, loading and unloading dish washer, and preparing all their meals. When am I supposed to hoover and dust? They are also not sleeping well at night so I can't face getting up an hour before them to get it done. After they go to bed is an option although recently we're not getting them down until 10 or so and by that point I'm knackered. I feel like I'm letting them down and they are suffering because of me. What am I supposed to do?

They’re at an age where they can play with each other and toys without you there. Get them used to playing in there whilst you are there and then start leaving the room for short periods of time.

Believe me eight month old twins are not of an age where they can play with each other without the mother being there!!!!!!!

I had a 4yo, 3yo and newborn twins whilst studying a degree. The truth is that you do it all, some, none or burn. I mostly did it all, was mostly successful too. Unless you live in an utter shit tip, it shouldn't take more than 30 mins to do a half decent clean.

I had a 4yo, 3yo and newborn twins whilst studying a degree.

Respect! Feeling very inadequate now.

Tbh I found it easier to clean when mine were little like that,‘now they are older I’m constantly running around after them whilst they trash that house, I found it easier when they were less mobile!

Believe me eight month old twins are not of an age where they can play with each other without the mother being there!!!!!!!

Then she can get two separate playpens and put them next to each other.

Then she can get two separate playpens and put them next to each other.

Great idea if you can afford it and have the space.

@WonderfulYou

Believe me eight month old twins are not of an age where they can play with each other without the mother being there!!!!!!!

Then she can get two separate playpens and put them next to each other.

Oh yeah, how simple, everyone has space and ££££s for that! 🙄

I agree with all the answers about keeping your standards low and just surviving. Hats off to everyone parenting 8 month old twins, IMO.

One possible idea, if you can't afford, or find a cleaner, can you ask around if anyone local has a teen that would come and play with your babies for an hour ? Building up their CV for some later babysitting, or of course experience for anyone studying childcare. My dc3 would have done this at the drop of a hat as she just enjoys being around babies. You are still obviously 'there' and supervising from a distance, but perhaps able to give the bathroom or kitchen a bit of a clean and dust or put the vacuum round .

I only had one child and luckily could afford a cleaner. If I hadn't, I would have done the absolute bare minimum, too exhausted. S with twins it is totally normal not to have the energy, what you are doing is an extreme endurance test. Be kind to yourself.

Oh yeah, how simple, everyone has space and ££££s for that!

I got mine for £5 second-hand and it easily fit in a tiny 1 bed flat with room to spare as it was a small one.

Obviously if this is not an option for OP then she doesn’t have to do it but she asked for advice on what she could do, not what she has to do.
She didn’t ask for sarky comments!

Some posters have said to get a robot cleaner which are way more expensive than a playpen. Some will probably even suggest hiring a cleaner.
They are just suggestions!

Could you get a cleaner ? I have 8 month twins also and just can’t get the house clean as I’d like. Cleaner is a lifesaver, even fortnightly. Mine works around us too. The playpen was a no go for us, I did try, but they just cried and wanted to climb out. They are at the crawling and pulling themselves up / standing stage, so I prefer to let them explore , but it’s hard to keep up !

I hope you are ok. Twins are hard work and I can imagine tougher with eczema. Sending hugs

Agree ! I have 8 month twins, and they are very good at playing and roaming around. But not with each other in a confined space

@334bu sorry I was agreeing with your post

As soon as I knew I was expecting twins, we hired a cleaner and kept her for a couple of years! It was a tiny cottage and we had a stretch to afford it, but it kept me sane and reasonably rested.

Jumperoo twice a day for 30 mins each time. With the telly on.
Just do the bar minimum, or does get easier. And yes to a robot vacuum

Once a week I get up at 4am and blurs the house. I hate it but it’s the only way I can get it done. I always make sure I am really busy the following day so I don’t have time to feel the tiredness, Urghh.

*blitz

Strap them into bouncy chair in whatever room you're cleaning. Clean when they're napping (if you're not resting too) or do it once they're asleep at night so you've no mess to get up to.
It's trial and error for what'll work for you, you're not always going to get it all done. I found it harder once DC was on the move to get anything done.

Can you do housework when your partner gets home? Or you split it so if you can vacuum in the day and he can dust in the evening?
It must be difficult with twins. I've only got one litte one (17 months) and I still struggle to get housework done.

334bu sorry I was agreeing with your post smile

No worries I thought the 2 playpens would be a good idea. I didn't have the space but would certainly have had two if I could have squeezed them in.
So glad mine are now grown to all those still trying to survive .

I had 3 under 3 and i can honestly say my house was a tip for the first year, my youngest 2 are 12mths apart.

*Once they were able to sit up in the bath in a seat i cleaned the bathroom whilst they bathed (i did realise that meant the bath never got cleaned but at least the toilet and sink did)
*Washing i did when they were in their high chairs eating at lunchtime

• hoovering i did after dinner so whilst they were still sat in their highchairs
• dusting was done when they napped (if they didnt nap i didnt dust)
• I majorly lowed my standards and accepted whilst they were so little i wasnt going to have a show home as long as it was a basic level of clean that had to do.

I disagree with the suggestions of sleep training. The issue here isn't that there's anything wrong with the babies' sleep, it's that as a society we've lost the "village" that would have rallied round and supported you at this time. So I don't think the solution is to try to fix something that isn't broken, it's to work with where you are.

Firstly, lower your standards (as much as possible with regard to the eczema - 8s it definitely related to dust?).

Secondly, outsource anything you can (cleaner, Eufy robovac, babies eat what you eat etc.)

Thirdly, try to find a village. Is there a local college teaching childcare with students who need experience, or a responsible local teen who could do a few hours of looking after the babies while you clean? Are there any mother's helps near you? Are you eligible for support from Startrite?

Mine had naps. Or I'd do it after they went to bed. I was very lucky that they slept.

My house is much much messier now I have teens.

Are you eligible for support from Startrite?

Homestart?

Home start model parenting skills. They don't officially do chores.