To ask retail staff not to guess and volunteer people’s dress size?

[Schhhteeevie]

I’ve just been in a shop, I was looking at a dress, I picked up the first one at the front to look at it closer and the retail assistant walked over, shook her head and volunteered the following “No, judging from your shoulders I’d say you need a (insert dress size two sizes larger than one that I had the audacity to grasp in my grubby little paws) at least”

Thanks love, I’ll add rugby shoulders to my list of things I didn’t know I needed to worry about in up now.

Yabu - she was doing her job
Yanbu - she was being a nosey caaaah

Up until now*

What a rude cow! Was it a snooty, bitchy boutique type shop?

I went into a local charity shop and was looking at something on the mannequin when the woman behind the counter shouted out 'They're EXTRA SMALL Love, they won't fit you'. I took great pleasure in trying them on then buying them, and telling her how they 'Fit me perfectly'

You could have been buying it for anybody. There was no need for her snotty observation.

Yep, hate it in general when shop assistants descend upon me and start giving me unsolicited advice. It's the number one way to ensure I won't buy anything from that shop. Just. Fuck. Off.

Had an assistant at Sephora once try and plug me some full coverage foundation to "cover up those horrible freckles". I told her my freckles were my favourite feature and that I wouldn't be purchasing anything from her and walked straight out. I've not been back since.

Weird to comment, I buy clothes for my daughter which clearly wouldn’t fit me so how do they know you was buying it for yourself?

@CaribouCarafe
That's awful! I'd love natural freckles.
The snotty woman wouldn't think much of my freckle pen

I would maybe assume their sizing comes up smaller, compared to other store sizes, rather than she was being snarky tbh.
I hate having to guess what size I’m supposed to be these days. I can vary up to 2 sizes in one store depending on the garment!

YANBU. Apart from anything else, for all she knew you could have been looking to buy a dress for someone else!

Presumably you'd just ask an assistant for advice in that case. You don't expect them to hover over your shoulder and tell you that you are dreaming if you think you could fit in to that.

Very rude and I’d complain, maybe send an email if you can. Lots of people have unhealthy relationships with their bodies, this could have been so much worse.

The only time I want help like that is if I’m going to be measured for a bra. I must say that the ability to just look and say ‘you’re an x cup’ size (and be right) is impressive.

@CaribouCarafe I hate Sephora customer service. I wanted to buy makeup for my wedding in there (and was willing to spend quite a lot of money) and one of the assistants was so pushy/wouldn’t leave me alone to actually look at things (they clearly had certain products that they wanted to sell) that I left.
She also kept trying to sell me extra things by pointing out my ‘flaws’ (some of which were blatantly untrue- she kept talking about my greasy skin, when it’s really obvious that it’s actually dry). Thank you, but I’m actually happy being pale and having curly hair- please put down the fake-tan and just let me look at the eyeshadows that I actually want to buy!

And they wonder why online shopping is so popular !

I like my broad shoulders. They contribute a lot to my hourglass figure. Plus are handy for things like hauling the garden equipment around.

I guess you won't shop there again, not least since you think people like us should be ashamed of our bodies?

How rude!

What did the shop assistant say when you punched her in the mush!!!??!!!

YANBU, very fucking rude and presumptuous.

I was in the pharmacy some months back, buying some stuff, and the assistant said 'are you over 60? It's 15% off for over 60s...' (I was fifty fucking three! ) I said 'NO.' I am closer to 50 than 60... and looked a bit like ... She said 'oh sorry, it's hard to tell these days. Ooooh you shoulda lied and got 15% off.' I just scowled at her. Cheeky bint!

Like do NOT guess or assume. Many people are sensitive about their age and weight, and assuming/asking if I was in my 60s was a step too far IMO.

In contrast, I was speaking to a woman who was celebrating her 65th birthday that day (a few weeks after that,) and said that she has a son around my age. Well he can't have been any older that 43-46, so that kind of made up for it, as she thought I was in my early to mid 40s! Still, fucking cheek eh?

I thought the age of pestering, and interfering staff in clothes stores, had long gone... You used to come across people like this, as in the 1950's era, in upmarket places. I am an oldie, so remember such types.

I had a friend like this. I’d pick something up and say ‘this is nice’ and she’d always say ‘that’s not your size!’ I know that I am just looking at it and if I like it I will look for my size ffs. She even mentioned it to another friend that I always look at the wrong size. I am just looking first.

I’d have used my broad shoulders to barge past her, straight out the door.

"Like do NOT guess or assume. Many people are sensitive about their age and weight, and assuming/asking if I was in my 60s was a step too far IMO."

How would anybody get the 60+ discount then if it's not written on a poster on the wall.

@CaribouCarafe if you want a foundation that doesn't cover freckles up but makes your skin look good whilst they're still visible Glossier is great.(off topic I know!)

This happened to me recently. Sales assistant called over to me asking if I wanted size X or Y, which are one and two sizes respectively larger than my actual size. I was so upset that I left the store. It shouldn't matter but it does.

I don't know, presumably if you were buying it a friend/relative you would have said 'oh its not for me'?

She probably knows how many clothes have to be dumped when people have stretched them/split the seams trying to force the wrong size on.

@DrierThanANunsNasty

I’d have used my broad shoulders to barge past her, straight out the door.

yup same

I used to work in clothes retail and would have been horrified if one of my staff has said something like that! We were always trained that a cheery "hello, how are you?" is enough for people to know you are approachable if they need you. Maybe a "do you need any help?" if they look like they are struggling. She was being a cow.

She should have just asked if she could help you. Staff pouncing on people always puts me off, a simple 'hello and can I help you' I can understand but approaching customers and giving them 'advice' is not on. It reminds of chuggers, I used to literally walk in zig zags avoiding them years ago when I went to shop in town.