AIBU?
I was shocked to hear a friend tell her dp to 'play the race card'
MascaraOHara · 14/12/2007 14:56
Her dp has been made redundant during the phone conversation when he was telling her she used the phrase "I think you should play the race card" she is hindi and he is muslim. I was really shocked that she would say that and had to bite my lip to stop myself telling her she can't say things like that. What do you guys think. Actually I don't think I should have put this is in 'am I being unreasonable' but I can't be bothered to move it.
MascaraOHara · 14/12/2007 15:00
no, he's just been made redundant. Get the impression it was last one in first one out..
To be honest if she had thought it was genuine racism she wouldn't she wouldn't have said "just play the race card" would she. The thing that shocked me is that she said it so openly and naturally.. it really worried me.
LemonTart · 14/12/2007 16:13
you have just summed it up nametaken = totally agree that there is a real culture of using the role of victim, not just with "the race card" but with all sorts of things. My gran truly believes she should not have to pay her phone bill as she is a widow (?!!) and I have seen people jump queues, take advantage of other?s good will on the scantiest grounds - like the perfectly fit old lady on the corner of our road who insists on struggling on to the bus so she embarrasses someone (pregnant woman, elderly gent with doddery legs etc etc) to give up their seat rather than stand the half mile trip - she cycles miles and miles and happily walks her dog over hills and fields in all weather.. One of the less pleasant facets of human nature unfortunately and not just a limited to being a "race card" issue. Lets not dwell on it though - loads of nice people out there who would not dream of taking advantage by playing the victim
allIWannaBeForChristmas · 14/12/2007 16:35
I would have said something. but then I'm just like that.
It makes me really when people suggest to me that I should "play the disability card" to gain advantage, ie to get free admition into theme parks/attractions etc. I refuse to do so. I also know someone who was under threat of redundancy and who said that he was going to claim disability discrimination if he was made redundant .
Blu · 14/12/2007 17:03
Especially as people who are still subject to genuine discrimination are still more likely to be made redundant / have their rights undermined as a result of race, disability, pregnancy etc.
Perhaps the reality is that people flasely claiming discrimination will not stop until genuine discrimination has stopped.
If there is a fair, genuine and watertight redundancy process, it won't work anyway.
Blu · 14/12/2007 17:20
Quite.
The thing is, I have only ever heard 'the race card' used as an expression when someone was dismissing a genuine objection to something on racist grounds - 'oh he's playing the race card' after someone has brought a completely justified grievance for something whicc was rooted in racism.
flowerytaleofNewYork · 14/12/2007 17:31
I wish I was more shocked by this. I have come across a couple of people professionally who had a chip on their shoulder and were convinced anything that didn't go their way or any performance issues raised were to do with their race/sex/both rather than genuine issues. Most people know that the majority of individuals from minority groups don't have an attitude like that but having to deal with this does influence some people's more general perception which is sad. It also saps the confidence of managers when having to deal with a difficult issue and makes them paranoid about making (for example) a black woman redundant.
Of course sometimes there is discrimination but there are also a lot of paranoid managers out there desperate to do the right thing.
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