In thinking that if your 12 year old has friends over for a sleepover

[RosaLuxMundi]

you do not go out for the evening and leave them to my own devices. Because a neighbour did this at the weekend. She popped round to me before she left to ask me to keep an ear out for any rowdy behaviour and left them to it.
Apparently all was well (DH popped in to check on them once and they were all playing on the computer) but I doubt very much she told the parents of the visiting children that they were going to be unsupervised all evening.
Am I being overprotective or is this not on? And what do I say next time she lets me know that her DS is home alone? Because there will be a next time.

ynbu at all!

That is outrageous! I thought you had to be 14 before you could be left alone anyway.... well, thats what my mum told me

Either way it is incredibly irresponsible, and YANBU, at all!!!

I also think, she has a bloody cheek, expecting you and your DH to keep an ear or eye on them! cheeky cow!

I strongly suggest you have a word with her about it. What if, god forbid, something had happened? how would she feel then? Or, would that also be our responsibility

How old were the children?

Not that that matters a great deal; just because her DS is responsible enough to be left alone, pack mentaility can mean mayhem within a very short space of time.

So, no YANBU. She is a cheeky mare for expecting you to keep an ear out for trouble.

i would leave 12 year old home alone, day time, but not with company, you cannot guarantee what their friends would get up to, pack mentality and stuff.

oops saw the 12 yo just as I hit post

I'm sure there have been threads on here saying there isn't actually a legal minimum age, but I could be wrong.

I am shocked!

YANBU - That is totally unreasonable behaviour on your neighbours part!

I would be bloody furious if I found out my dd had been left unsupervised for a sleep over!
YANBU at all!!!!

Bloody hell - that's completely out of order. DD is 12 and I am always over-cautious when she has friends around, I feel a bit hesitant about going to Tesco for 10 minutes! I am ok about leaving dd for an hour or two when she is on her own, but think when combined with another excitable 12 year old they could get up to all sorts. Also you never quite know what other people's parenting is like; the friend's mum may never have left her child on her own at all.

You neighbour is a cheeky mare - where was he, anyway, did she have something important to do, or was she going down the pub

There is no age restriction on when you leave children alone in the house. It really is up to you, but I wouldn't leave a 12 yr old, home alone for more than about 1/2 hour.

YANBU, your neighbour was totally out of order. Personally I would be happy to leave my 11yo for an hour or so during the early eve, but not with a load of friends. After all, the neighbour would be responsible if anything should happen, they can get v silly at sleepovers. What time was she back? Mind you I hate sleepovers so I can see why going out would be tempting!!

YANBU.It's fine to leave your own 12 year old at home during the day for a couple odf hours.But it is not on to invite your 12 year olds friends for a sleepover and then go out for the night. I wouldn't even do that with my 15 year old.