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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask if you would be pissed off that someone who came to help you in your garden wiped cat shit all over your doormat?

52 replies

1234comeonbabysayyouloveme · 14/11/2021 18:23

Just that, really.

Family member has been nagging me about our garden. It's not overgrown it's just we don't do much with it beyond keeping it back. They said they'd come and help cut it back before winter proper. Very kind of them.

When we came in they said they'd stood in cat shit (neighbours have loads of cats) oh no! says I, about to go and get the bleach to turn round and find that they are wiping their shoes all over my doormat inside the backdoor of the kitchen.

Yes, I'm a toad for letting a family member 'help' with my garden, I'm sure lots of people will want to tell me that.

But really, wiping cat shit all over your daughter's family member's kitchen doormat? People do this?

OP posts:
ALongHardWinter · 15/11/2021 01:04

Many years ago,I witnessed a friend's son use the dish washing sponge to clean dog shit off his shoe,in the kitchen sink,over several plates and cutlery. Urgh. 🤮

Caterinasballerinas · 15/11/2021 07:12

Disrespectful and also complete lack of common sense. I’d be binning the doormat and bunging the shoes outside. What did you end up doing? I can imagine you were stunned!

Whereismumhiding3 · 15/11/2021 08:19

They are pretty rank.

How did they expect you to get cat poo out of the indoor mat afterwards? Other than have to throw that in the bin?

And did they expect to leave their smeared cat poo shoes on and walk around your house?

I'd be saying "stop there, shoes off and put outside please" . And expecting them to clean it off on grass outside and use disinfectant wipes that are disposed on in a plastic bag straight away.

No one wears muddy or poop covered shoes over my doorstep so I'd be hugely mad.

It would be irrelevant that they were helping me in my garden. It doesn't help me to spread cat poo around my house, that's disgusting. I'd rather have no help than damaging help.

minipie · 15/11/2021 08:36

I am guessing they are a —older man— person who is used to having someone else deal with household mess and so didn’t even think about the consequences for you.

Missey85 · 15/11/2021 09:29

Isn't that what a doormat is for? Would you rather he wiped it in your house?

Original poster
1234comeonbabysayyouloveme · 15/11/2021 09:30

@Missey85

Isn't that what a doormat is for? Would you rather he wiped it in your house?
You keep cat faeces inside your house?
OP posts:
Pumpkinsonparade · 15/11/2021 11:22

The roofer has vanished.. His ladder is still here.. If it isn't too heavy would I be unreasonable to take a swing at him with it if /when he shows up? Obviously when he has finished the roof.
We have decking. He isn't too big to shove him under it unnoticed..

ChippyChipper · 15/11/2021 11:25

Did h

ChippyChipper · 15/11/2021 11:27

Sorry phone too fast!

Did he wear his shoes round the house when they had cat shit on as well?

This is precisely why we are a shoeless house!

Dixiechickonhols · 15/11/2021 11:28

I wouldn’t like it. All I can think is they thought washable mat so wipe feet then wash it but much better to have left shoes outside and dealt with it there - kitchen paper etc.

TangerineDreams · 15/11/2021 11:31

@bestbeforedateexpired

Better that than MIL using a dinner knife and scraping dog shit off her shoe over my kitchen sink.
Oh good god!!!!
AllThingsServeTheBeam · 15/11/2021 11:31

@Missey85

Isn't that what a doormat is for? Would you rather he wiped it in your house?
You're kidding right? You think an indoor door mat is for wiping shit on? Ew your house!!
AllThingsServeTheBeam · 15/11/2021 11:32

Yanbu op. Shit on shoes mean the shoes get left outside to be dealt with ffs. Anyone with sense knows that!

TotallySuper · 15/11/2021 11:36

This is why we have a Boot Buddy. Shoes off outside, cleaned outside with boot buddy. Job done.

I'd have to bin that door mat Op.

Did the "family member" take them shoes off after wiping the shit on the doormat at least or did they walk it around your house too?

TangerineDreams · 15/11/2021 11:37

My DS will come home with poo on his shoes quite a bit these days, especially now people absolute cunts who should be pinned down and force fed it are leaving it hidden by fallen leaves. At just 9 years old he is well aware that it doesn't get wiped off onto a mat! Who's going to clean the mat?! Not I! He also doesn't wipe it off onto my lawn, steps or flagstones.

He takes his shoes off outside and tells me. I have found the MN dreaded loo brush is just what's needed. Hold the shoe inside the toilet bowl and use the flush and a loo brush to wash it off so the shoes can go in the washing machine.

BarbaraLoganPrice · 15/11/2021 11:39

@bestbeforedateexpired

Better that than MIL using a dinner knife and scraping dog shit off her shoe over my kitchen sink.
Is your MIL Barbara Royle?
MrsSkylerWhite · 15/11/2021 11:40

They couldn’t just take the shoe off and hose it down/pour hot water over it outside or, novel idea, wipe it off with loo roll and flush it away?

No, yanbu. They’re a cheeky sod, anyway, telling you your gardens not up to scratch. Why is it any of their business?

DrManhattan · 15/11/2021 11:41

Not on an inside door mat. That's well scruffy.

RincewindsHat · 15/11/2021 11:45

I assume you are aware your neighbour's cat craps in your garden? TBH I would be annoyed if I'd come over to help you out and you hadn't bothered to make sure I wouldn't be walking through shit. YABU for not bothering to clean it up. As for the doormat, where else are they supposed to wipe their shoes off? They were trying to do a nice thing for you, and surely your doormat is washable anyway so this is not the end of the world.

TotallySuper · 15/11/2021 11:47

@RincewindsHat

I assume you are aware your neighbour's cat craps in your garden? TBH I would be annoyed if I'd come over to help you out and you hadn't bothered to make sure I wouldn't be walking through shit. YABU for not bothering to clean it up. As for the doormat, where else are they supposed to wipe their shoes off? They were trying to do a nice thing for you, and surely your doormat is washable anyway so this is not the end of the world.
Do you go out into your garden 100s of times a day to check for cat poo then? Because that's what you'd have to do in order to not miss one. Cats are quick!
Witchinthedales · 15/11/2021 11:50

They should have taken their shoes off outside the door.

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 15/11/2021 11:58

@RincewindsHat

I assume you are aware your neighbour's cat craps in your garden? TBH I would be annoyed if I'd come over to help you out and you hadn't bothered to make sure I wouldn't be walking through shit. YABU for not bothering to clean it up. As for the doormat, where else are they supposed to wipe their shoes off? They were trying to do a nice thing for you, and surely your doormat is washable anyway so this is not the end of the world.
I am shuddering to think of some people's houses if they think it's ok to wipe shit on an indoor doormat. Mine is one of those strawy spiky ones so there is no way it's washable!
limitedperiodonly · 15/11/2021 12:06

@bestbeforedateexpired

Better that than MIL using a dinner knife and scraping dog shit off her shoe over my kitchen sink.
Oh God! Sue Johnston did this in the Royle Family. It's the episode where Anthony brings his posh vegetarian girlfriend round for his birthday and Nana offers her some wafer thin ham.

It was turning my stomach - the dog poo not the ham - but I didn't realise anyone would do it. Shock

RincewindsHat · 15/11/2021 12:13

@TotallySuper all you need to do is do a sweep before the family member comes over to work in your garden, it's likely 5-10 mins to check the garden over at most and if it wasn't done, it should have been.

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 15/11/2021 12:15

[quote RincewindsHat]@TotallySuper all you need to do is do a sweep before the family member comes over to work in your garden, it's likely 5-10 mins to check the garden over at most and if it wasn't done, it should have been.[/quote]
I can't get up the steps in my garden as my mobility it terrible at the min so it's not always possible.