To think the doctor shouldn't have said this following mammogram?

[3beforeme]

I found a breast lump and was referred to the breast clinic last week. Had a mammogram, ultrasound and four biopsies taken. After this the consultant took me in a side room advised that the mammogram had showed up calcifications and there were some "very worrying things" and he was concerned.

I'm just confused as to what the point was of telling me this? I mean obviously we won't actually know anything until the biopsy results but consequently I have spent the last few days scared shitless and on countdown to my results appointment. I'm just confused as to why he would be so negative at all. It seems cruel. Why not just give a standard "let's wait to the biopsy results"? It seemed speculative and unnecessary.

Also looking to hear anyone else who has been through similar and had negative feedback? Was the feeling of the consultant generally right?

My friend had the opposite experience with an ovarian cyst, it had grown very quickly and she paid privately to have it removed. The consultant named the cyst as benign, told her she hadn't a thing to worry about but the results came back as cancerous. Her wound which had just healed had to be reopened and she went through debulking surgery and treatment. It's a difficult decision for the consultant but I think yours has gone the right way.

The days when the patient was the last to know are, thankfully, long gone. Doctors now tell you what they know from their observations and experience. Your body, your right to know.

[quote 3beforeme]@MissyB1 thank you. And so sorry to hear that you've been through it. Just the waiting around for possible breast cancer results seems to have tipped me over the deep end so god knows how i'll cope if it actually is.[/quote]
Just remember that it is highly treatable now. Try to remain positive - the earlier the diagnosis the better it will be for you.

Unfortunately as you can see from the messages above there is no right way.

Either people are left shocked if they get bad news, or left worrying if they didnt have to.

I know I'd want to know and would find it worse if I had a false sense that everything was ok and instead the news was bad.

You are right, they dont know til the biopsy results come through. Hoping for good news.

I would rather know. I would like to have time to make hypothetical plans should I need treatment. I've seen how life can be turned upside down in a day. My dad got his blood results back and was in hospital the same day, then flown away to a different hospital for weeks of treatment the day after.

It's not easy. I'm sorry you are going through this. I really hope the doctor is wrong.

Honestly this is a really difficult one. I get what you mean on the one hand about wanting to wait until they know for certain, but other people prefer to be given some sort of warning so that results are less of shock if it does come back as cancerous. I don't think the doctor has done anything wrong per se. I'm sorry you are having to go through this though.

I think if you'd have asked me prior to this appointment I would have said I'd rather know if they were concerned. But now after several days of googling calcifications, lumps etc and stressing out about it I am very much of the "keep me in the dark until you can give me the facts camp." Especially as evidenced above they can get things wrong at this stage. I'm not asking for false hope but a simple let's wait until biopsy results before we form an opinion would have sat a lot better with me.
He also told me to make sure I bring someone with me for my appointment even though they still have a "no visitor" policy in place due to covid. I appreciate why but I think this has probably added to my worries.

[quote 3beforeme]@ozanj yes they did 2 vacuum biopsy's of the calcifications and then one of the lump and another for something else (I can't even remember what now 😩)[/quote]
They generally do fine needle aspiration biopsy or core biopsies for suspicions of BC .
Did they give you a BIRADS score? from the mammogram.....1 to 3 is likely fine ( benign) 4 and over ...then likely to be BC ....could you phone the BCN at your unit and ask her to have a look at your notes.....at our unit they explain BIRADS to you and tell you your score ....it gives you a heads up before getting your results....it’s about being open and honest , so that no one is withholding information about you, from you

@3beforeme. Hi I am sorry to hear you've had three previous breast cancer diagnosis, which required lumpectomies. I'm also sorry to hear you're back the "waiting room", which is the most unpleasant place to be.

I've lost both breasts to cancer and, each time I was given a pre warning by the consultant. The first time I was terrified, but the second time I felt it gave me some time to prepare for what was to come.

I hope you don't have to wait too long for your results, and that this time they are clear x

Yes, op. As clearly outlined above they should keep assumptions to themselves until they get the results... imagine being told by the consultant that they thought a lump was benign, only to turn out it wasn't.. just awful. Can't be much fun the other way round either with all the worry beforehand. I mean most people are going to be worrying aren't they?

My consultant surgeon at the breast clinic who did all my checks just shrugged everything off, 'you're only 20 with no know risk factors you'll be fine', 'it'll just be a fibroadenoma' and he kept overriding my symptoms as 'you must be mistaken, that cant happen fibroadenomas don't do that'.

Saw him for a year for monitoring which was monthly ultrasounds (the sonographer increasingly getting stressed at the tumour that had grown significantly each month) before seeing a specialist who lost his shit because I had a rare form of cancer in the early stage and nothing else fit my symptoms and results.

The specialist demanded a mastectomy for the Cystosarcoma (which was still in a pre-malignant stage so no harm was done really).

The consultant may not have been urgent but he was a great surgeon though, my mastectomy scar is very neat and was completely painless amazingly.

Basically, my point is I had the opposite though and lots of women find the 'there's nothing to worry about' approach just as offensive and patronising. (I didn't really mind either approach given I have had both although I found the latter more unnesacceraly dramatic).

Look on the bright side though if they really thought it bad they wouldn't have sent you home or be running slow tests.

People assumed to have Acute cancer are moved directly to treatment because waiting days for results would be a death sentence, if they sent you away and are running average speed tests they must be confident enough your not in any immediate danager.

Different disease, but my consultant with very forthcoming with information, (private sector) based on my presentation and MRI results. Sadly for me, he was correct. It helped me prepare, slightly, but still a shock when I got a confirmed diagnosis 2 years later. Wishing you lots of luck OP look after yourself and take each day at a time.

@Kitkat151 no they didn't give me a mammogram score. Following my extremely extensive googling I now wish I'd asked. I wii try and call the clinic tomorrow although I'm not sure they'd give that info out over the phone? Would it have been passed to my GP if I try there?

I would say he's preparing you for bad results so it's no so much of a shock when you get the results.

I have just been through this and at the end they said it is definitely cancer and in 7 days you will come back and have your treatment plan. They did ask if I wanted them to be honest first and I said yes.

I prefer to know, the one that annoys me is the GP in June who said it would be nothing. I called back in November as still back and bugging me and that GP said its almost certainly cancer and only a slim chance its not so was pre warned.

There's a cancer thread on general health for people waiting. I am just waiting, they said it could be any of stage 1 to stage 4 and its big and its good I am at the hospital and very good I can be available all the time. Sorry you are going through this too, its scary. I am trying to distract myself, they said not to google or if you do stick to cancer charity info. Hope you get the all clear, mine the first doctor took one look at me and said we need biopsies and the nurse added we will do a treatment plan then said well if we need one.

@mam0918 thanks for your reassurance. No the other way round must be horrendous too. I think the best policy would just be to say nothing at all without certainty.

I think waiting for results is hard regardless of what you are told or not told upfront. I was told it was looking likely to be cancer while awaiting biopsy results. Doctor's are looking at lumps day in and out and know what they are looking at. I was devastated but glad to have that time to process it and was prepared for the confirmation the following week. I do hope you get good news however and it turns out to be of no concern.

They are trying to prepare you so that if the news is bad then it’s not a total shock out of nowhere and you have someone with you for support. Everybody is different in terms of what they want to know but he was trying to be honest and kind even if it didn’t come across that way to you.

I am really sorry that you are going through this and I wish you all the best. I can only say that despite the worry it causes I would personally always want the clinician to be honest with me. I would find it paternalistic and infantilising to be 'protected' from the likelihood of what is happening in my own body.

Good luck

[quote 3beforeme]@Kitkat151 no they didn't give me a mammogram score. Following my extremely extensive googling I now wish I'd asked. I wii try and call the clinic tomorrow although I'm not sure they'd give that info out over the phone? Would it have been passed to my GP if I try there?[/quote]
Unlikely to be on your GP records...the hospital usually wait until investigations are complete before informing GP of the outcome....BCN will be able to access your hospital records though if you call the breast unit and ask for BCN contact number....they would tell you your BIRADS score over the phone ( they would at my local unit) as you’ve already seen the consultant and been told of his concerns .
The waiting is shit....try to keep yourself occupied and if your anxiety is getting out of control contact your GP .

Your mammo results will likely have been reviewed not only by the consultant but also by a clinical radiologist ( you may not have seen them but there would have been one in the department at the time of your clinic) before giving you any Verbal indicator .
Good luck 🍀

Thanks so much everyone wishing me luck and @Kitkat151 thanks for all the info, very useful!

Sorry to read this OP. No wonder you're scared. All the best with your treatment, whatever it turns out to be 💐

Totally agree with you and you could certainly raise this as something you are unhappy with. It’s too blunt. You should at least be given the option to know if the consultant had any early thoughts / concerns etc etc.

If the consultant thought that what they were seeing on a scan was very clear, they might think that saying so is not speculative and will prepare you, rather from any kind of cruelty or intention to be bleak. I understand that not knowing is a situation which still gives you hope and you want to preserve that, but I also think that the doctor may want to keep you as informed as they are. I actually think I’d rather them tell me what they are seeing rather than stay quiet as I’d go out of my mind wondering anyway.

Just to add, for anyone reading this thread feeling very worried: my mother in law, sister and best friend all had breast cancer in the past three years, all discovered in various stages and all have recovered well.

He's being negative or cruel. He's treating you with the respect and dignity due to any adult, by telling you the true state of play (no lies or false assurances) and giving you a little time to get your head round a cancer diagnosis before the biopsy results arrive.

I know you're in shock. BTGTTS. 

    Information is your best ally.  It gives us time to make practical  decisions and contingency plans.  I tell every doctor  I  want full disclosure and not to hold back.  I go  to every  consult with a notebook, pen, and a written  list of all my worries and  questions and write down the answers (because the brain often blanks out under stress).

That's exactly why it's been suggested the OP takes someone with her.