Anyone else constantly scrutinise their appearance?

[Apacheshadows]

I wish I didn’t, nobody is perfect, and I know that social media is full of filtered pics but I still criticise my looks a lot.

I’m only 31, but I feel like my eye sockets look slightly sunken and that I’ve deep lines under and around my eyes. I had filler before which gave an amazing result, but I can’t afford it every time plus the procedure was pretty uncomfortable.

Same with Botox, can’t afford it every 4/5 months. Have started using Boots no7 retinol, no idea if it’ll actually work but I know it takes a while.

Teeth seem yellow but I can’t afford that, don’t know if whitening toothpaste has much effect.

Filler in my nose which is wearing off.

Basically it’s all things I’ve had before that have worn off and I cannot afford to have them redone every few months.

I constantly pick things apart when I look in the mirror and it’s unhealthy. Has anybody else been through this and been able to love themselves for how they look or at least accept it ?

I just get angry with it all, like. "how dare you try to make me feel bad just so you can make money"

Only thing I pay for is eyebrow threading and tinting

Why does looking good have to mean looking young?

I would look at Stephanie Lange on YouTube and see how the celebs that you think look perfect - even through surgery and filler - actually don't even look like that in real life, it's all camera trickery and it's known that selfie modes etc are rewiring our brains to forget what actual faces look like.

I feel like this too - I've never liked my face. I'm also now very overweight so that isn't great. But I refuse to have any work done because I know it would never be enough for me & I can't achieve what I want with the face I have. I don't think I'm really ugly or anything, but I'm just not attractive either. I don't generally like myself as a person either and have no idea how to change that so maybe it's all to do with your own self esteem? I have no idea. I could easily disappear today and I don't think anyone would notice. I try to tell myself people already know what I look like, it doesn't matter to them.

@Insertdeadcatsnamehere

Why does looking good have to mean looking young?

THIS

Anyway Op you're so young. I hate how bad so many women feel about themselves. It's shit

Grow up. You are getting older. we all do.

eddiesmairswife
Yeah, we all get older .Doesn’t mean that that we got be happy about it. I’m quite sure quite sure people are adult about it and don’t need to “grow up”!

Delete Instagram off your phone. Get rid of the mirrors in your house apart from one. Do NOT buy a magnifying mirror.
Look at photos of you 10 years ago. Did you think you looked like shit? Looking now though- did you? No I thought not.

Your skin is fine, you are fine. Listen to your boyfriend and have some crazy fun!

Watching Stephanie Lange’s videos now and they really are eye-opening.
‘Grow up’ was really not necessary.
I hope I will start gaining some more confidence

Why do you care so much about a few wrinkles op? You sound very self obsessed.

Yep I'm 37'weeks pregnant and scrutinising how big my hips and thighs have got. I know they'll help me deliver but atm I just hate them. I've always been really hard on myself I hate it

I totally get you. I feel this.
I was looking at getting filler but there are some shocking awful things that can and do happen so wouldn't recommend doing that again.

I'm a bit overweight after having baby 2 which doesn't help. The dark circles under eyes, wonky nose, I just look a bit old and I'm only 33. So tired

OP you poor thing. It's a really habitual habit that does you no good in the end. As are so many things people do.

The things to do as are pp have said but easier said than done.

1. Look in mirror less. If loads in house replace some with pics! Out and about if big mirror you walk past take different way round if is one

1. We are encouraged in loads of things to focus on ourselves in parts. Ads which say. You eyelashes can/ should be like this! Ditto mouth, eye lines (laughter lines!), skin, everything. Also the mags etc even if don't buy they are all over the shops. Omg look at her toenail! Disaster- slight imperfection on side of neck!

You are a whole person and anyone looking at you glances at you as a whole. They don't come up and stare at your left eye and think well fuck that eyelash isn't aligned to the others. Step back. Try to stop obsessing on the close up detail.

1. Listen to your OH! Trust their opinion (I assume oh is not horrible arsehole from what you've said!).

1. We're all much more than our looks irrespective of what messages we are constantly given.

I really hope you can break this habit x

To me, this sounds like it’s bordering on a form of body dysmorphia. My sister is absolutely stunning but she genuinely feels the same way as you (and others agreeing with you). When people say beauty radiates from within, they’re not lying. Confident (not smug), positive, smart, funny etc all these things show on people’s faces way more than fillers etc do. Think about people you find attractive, they can’t all be the surgically enhanced ones. The teeth, I understand that, maybe save up for that if you want to but I agree you need to put the mirror down (I read somewhere that they aren’t completely accurate anyway, some scientific explanation for it involving back to front image). Sun damage is apparently the worst thing you can do to your skin so wear spf even in winter. We’re all getting railroaded in to looking a certain way but when you think about it, the true beauties (not the stereotypical ones) are always remembered but the others are quickly forgotten (makes sense in my head 🥴)