House signed to me in court

[Cos12345]

So long story ex husband and I divorced over seven years ago, house is still in joint names as mortgage company won't take him off. Although I pay all the mortgage and have done for last ten years when we split. In court I was awarded house due to his lying and cheating , he has just told me dd that when I come to sell the house current mortgage will end in five years he is going to make it hell for me.
I have remarried and we intend to stay in house. I'm so worried now anyone experienced this ?

Your XH was a Grade A arsehole, no doubt about that.
But I agree with the PP, that it was misleading to suggest that your XH was able to force a sale on the house purely because of the “attaining age 18” clause - the reason was due to a complete re-working of the divorce financials which left you unable to pay the upkeep - and that was on interest-only not repayment anyway.

I don’t see that you’ll need to work beyond retirement age.
You already, in your 50s, have a mortgage free house. You’re in a permanent job so will be contributing to your pension, and will have state pension too. Happily, you have the option to downsize too - so I don’t see that you’d need to work beyond retirement age.

Awful that your XH was able to screw you over live that - but, priceless in a way to be rid of him!

Feeling confused/frustrated/numb….
After having to leave our family home last June due to DH making it unbearable to live in anymore ( slept on sofa for 3 months, silent treatment one minute abusive rants the next, total manipulative game playing messing with my daughters and my head - I had to put the kids 1st and show them it’s not a normal way to live - when I say kids - 19 /17 & 15 years).
The game playing went from agreeing to selling the house - letting me get half way through purchasing a house (solicitor fees and searches all paid more) DH taking the girls to look at houses with him and amicably agreeing split 50/50 to taking the house off the market behind my back resulting in me losing the house I was buying and trapped. I wasn’t strong enough mentally at the time to start any legal proceedings as I was scared of him due to the verbal abuse I was living with.
So to get normality back in the kids lives we eventually found a place to rent - a squeeze but not hostile environment! DH swung from verbal abuse to manipulation to ‘always here if you need anything’- absolute mind scramble!!
Once we were out he told me he had no intention of selling the house for a few years so he could’adjust’ - hence I had to take a loan out and start divorce proceedings 😢
So for past 7 months I am struggling financially as no help from him towards the kids (I plucked up the courage to visit him and ask if he could help out at all and was told tbe £20k in the bank had been gambled away and just laughed in my face!) Fuming - still don’t know if a lie or he has gambled it away- just another mind game?…….
During all this he decided I was going through the menopause which was making me make all these decisions- ignoring the fact I was getting away from his controlling manipulative not very nice ways- much easiest for him to gloss over that and just blame me. For the record I have no menopause symptoms and have 3 kids that backed me getting out as it was long overdue….
So now divorce papers served but he refuses to acknowledge them so going to be a long haul - my solicitor has advised to stop the games and go to court so the judge decides the timelines and me and DH have to abide by this. Going to cost a fortune so increase the loan - all I want is the family house sold so many kids can move on and start afresh.
He has spoilt any relationship he had with kids due to his mind games - not to mention he is pretending the key is stuck in the lock for the door we have keys for and enters the house through another door that we have no key for - controlling at it’s best. At the beginning kids visited for meals and catch up but DH then started to control when they were coming under his terms only - once a week texts copy and pasted to all 3 of them but no general chitchat through the week. He’s also denying access to passports/ important paperwork pretending the file has been lost ! Been very cocky about it and controlling. Makes my blood boil but what can I do? Any advice?
I now learn he’s in his rights to continue to live in the big 4 bed home - I can only move back in within my rights but cannot make him leave to make his kids comfortable !
It’s all so frustrating and a rollercoaster I don’t know where I am going to find the strength to face him in court and come out ok with this mess.
I hate the fact I am scared of him as he is always 2 steps ahead with his manipulation and controlling ways - just feel I will never escape.
Sorry for the rant but woke up very low and try to be ok in front of the kids 🙈
Any advice or just anyone been in similar situation that can sympathise would be appreciated.
Thanks

@XxDog8

Sorry you are going through this - I don't have any helpful advice but this is a thread from last year so many people will only read the OP.

You will get more helpful advice if you start your own thread.

Remember what he said before about making your life hell.

look at the freedom programme and get them both gone! Be single.

The same lying cheating husband who was going to make your life hell when you came to sell your house? What on Earth, you need to leave both of these men.

He’ll be able to force the sale of the house if you can’t buy him out and believe me his credit rating/ability to move on with his life will be more important to the court than your children security or keeping the roof over your kids head.

you need to fix this quickly before lawyers become involved and all of the equity gets pissed at the wall on costs.

Uh? That’s quite a leap - from just getting back in touch to you asking about getting back together?!

Out of the frying pan into the fire. Or rather, back to the fire. Please - do the Freedom Programme.

Been married three years second marriage.
Been emotionally abusive throughout, I've made my decision to end marriage.
House is in in my name as he moved in
Will he be entitled to fifty percent

Again seek legal advice. The house will have become a marital asset so will go in the pot of assets to be decided. If you can't agree division then the court will decide. It will depend on the value of other assets but it is a fairly short marriage.

Zombie

Which country do you live in? Scotland has a different legal system vs England & Wales.
Assuming England, then he has a valid claim on all your assets, as you do his.
There is no law of 50/50, it’s just a theoretical starting point. Long before you get near a court you have negotiations between yourselves and with mediators anc solicitors.
Where basically your solicitor tells him it’s a short marriage and he can get to fuck 😉
But after 3 years, yes, he may well get awarded a percentage but I can’t see it being 50%.

Many questions though.

Do you even own the house fully? Last year it was still in joint names with first husband.

What has second husband paid in terms of rent, or other contribution?

Does second husband have assets? Don’t under estimate pension value - though same goes for you.

@StoneofDestiny it isn’t, because it’s the OP who has revived it!

You do need to get him off the mortgage ASAP because if you don’t you are going to need what they call a concessionary mortgage, basically he is gifting you the equity and that will be deposit for the remortgage the issue is if he won’t sign to say that he doesn’t have an interest in the property going forward you will not get the mortgage and actually I got a fraud marker put on my credit file because he wouldn’t sign it. Lack of transparency surrounding the transaction.

Ignore the above I was reading the original OP, three years would be considered a short marriage by the courts but you do need to deal with this quickly.

Eh? In November you'd been divorced 7 years. Now you're not divorced but have been married fro 3 years...?

Are you making things up?

Oh it's your second husband you're divorcing sorry New thread would be sensible.

it's all been legally completed from the settlement in court

So what could he possibly do to you in five years? I think you need better legal advice.

Does he have a charge against the house?
My Dsis ExH had a charge against their house when they split. He wouldn’t let her buy him out as he was an arsehole and she had to sell in their end and pay him the ‘charge’ amount.

He can actually take the whole thing back to court and dispute it five years later this is why people need to rip the plaster off quickly if they can because nothing is done until the money is actually physically in the bank. 11 years later I’m still waiting for my share of the pension order.

Depends on what he’s lied and cheated about - if it’s hiding assets and not declaring other financial involvement then they can, in exceptional circumstances, award on that basis if he’s deemed to be unreliable. Not understanding why the mortgage provider isn’t co-operating though - I agree, OP you need proper legal advice.

Doesn't that depend on what type of mortgage it is? I'm wondering whether it's an interest only mortgage with the principal being repayable in five years' time.

There seem to be a lot of people laying claim to that house OP! Surely you know you need a solicitor?

If a court order was made, the result of that would usually be that you alone are on the title deeds with an appropriate order being made to sort out the mortgage. Did that happen?

If the court has awarded you the house, then you need to present that to your mortgage lender. At the very least they should allow you & your current husband to remortgage without this idiot involved.