Coming home at 4:30am and having the baby all day

[CrazyMama10]

My husband plays darts on a Thursday for a local pub

Tonight hes been as normal, I called into the pub when I dropped him off for a pint of shandy. Our little boy doesn’t go to sleep for me, a poo, a projectectile vomit and 2 1/2 later he was a sleep. I’ve been up since 6am and didn’t sit down till gone 10pm. That’s pretty normal for me I guess.

Husband comes home at 4:30am after being at the pub and then someone’s house. He will have about an hour and half sleep before needing to get up so I can shower the sick off me properly and get ready. He has our little boy all day tomorrow and I know he’ll be shattered so he’ll lay on the sofa most of the day (awake) while our little one entertains himself. I’m so annoyed with him. This isn’t a one off thing

The question is, can he parent safely?

If he can parent safely, it doesn't matter how rubbish he feels.

If parenting safely required parents always to be completely sober and have had 8 hours uninterrupted sleep, most of us should have self-reported to SS at some point.

YABU unless this is an every day occurrence then it’s fine for him to stay out as long as he wants

Maybe it is because I am an older parent, but DH and I got this staying out until all hours malarky out of our systems before DD came along.

You can still go out and enjoy yourself without your partner once you have children, but staying out until 4.30 and getting steaming drunk (or drugged) when you will be responsible for childcare the next day is not on.

Anyone who thinks this is OK must have very low expectations in a partner.

Make sure you let him get on with it all today!

Maybe it is because I am an older parent, but DH and I got this staying out until all hours malarky out of our systems before DD came along.

It could be. I know this was definitely my mum and grandmothers view.
I definitely think it’s now more acceptable to ‘have a life’ away from being a parent and enjoy nights out.

Most drugs you can’t sleep on so I doubt he’s doing hard drugs if he’s coming home and sleeping and most people who are absolutely wasted couldn’t wake up after only one hour and a half sleep.
It sounds like he knows how to pace himself/stop drinking after a certain time if he’s used to caring for his child all day the next day.