To say he should have cleaned the bath?

[Rosebel]

DHs turn to bath litte one and put him to bed. The only thing is he never empties the bath, or if he does it's at bedtime.
He came up to bed before me tonight and when I came up bath wasn't emptied. Not such a big thing except our son had obviously pooed in the bath. It was really obvious.
DH already asleep so I cleaned it up but it's pissed me off majorly. I mean if he didn't notice at the time he would have noticed later so why not clean it up? Does he think I find it enjoyable?
Tbf he normally does clear up if baby poos in the bath and I know he'll either say he didn't notice?!) or that he was too tired.
Still he's still a twat to have not cleaned up right?

Yeah, that is foul to leave the mess for you.
Does he forget? Or is it on purpose? If it’s just forgetfulness can put up reminder post its or a bedtime checklist.

That’s disgusting. Don’t let this go. Tomorrow talk to him about how him leaving it for you to do is totally unacceptable.

Urghh. I dp hope he showered the poor child off rather than just taking him out of shitty water

Wow that’s just nasty

I would have woken my DH to clean that up no way would I have done that job for him.

He needs to get into the habit of emptying it. A toddler could easily wander into the bathroom and drown.

Plus the shit thing is nasty

I would have pulled out the plug to avoid drowning risk that @CouchWoes mentioned and then left the bath for DH to clean. That is, if I had married and stayed married to someone so skanky and disrespectful in the first place.

He must know I'm pissed off as he sneaker off to work without waking me.
Less annoyed now I've had some sleep but still can't understand his thinking. It was gross.

I'd've left it and left it until he cleaned it. Showered DC tonight if needs be. It's a massive "this is beneath me but not beneath you, fuck you" from him. If he didn't do it deliberately, why is he sneaking around now?

He was thinking “rosebel will sort this shit out for me”, which you did.
Find that anger again. This was his job to fix and he just didn’t bother.

They most important point here is never leave a bath full of water around babies and toddlers. They can easily drown if it's left unattended for hours. Nip that in the bud and you also solve the cleaning issue. It's gross to leave it for to clean up as well.

@BlusteryLake

They most important point here is never leave a bath full of water around babies and toddlers. They can easily drown if it's left unattended for hours. Nip that in the bud and you also solve the cleaning issue. It's gross to leave it for to clean up as well.

The most important point is to respect your wife enough that you’re doing the whole of the job and not just the Disney dad bits. Nip that in the bud and life will be better. The bath water not being drained is a symptom, not the underlying problem.

I would bet my morning coffee that this is not the only think he’s just leaving the op to pick up the pieces after.

Ignoring the poo (which is disgusting btw), how difficult is it to just pull the plug out?

It’s really disrespectful
Wake him up and tell him to sort it out if he does it again

He didn't do it because he knew you would, and that was preferable to him than having to do it himself.

I'd be bloody angry.

His thinking was simple - "not my problem"

You should be angry about that, aside from the obvious safety issues that others have mentioned.

I'd have woken him up. What a lazy dirty git.

I truly think there's a place in Disney Dad hell for these half job type of people.
If you bath a child, you do the whole job. The bath, dress them, empty the bath and give it a wipe, put dirty clothes in the washing machine.

What some men appear to hear is 'bath the child's and just do that actual water part and nothing else.
It's lazy. It's incompetent and it's taking the piss.

It's also dangerous leaving a bath full of water.

Tell him it's his turn to do it again. But this time, he's going to do the full job.

Same as people emptying a dishwasher but not putting the stuff away or leaving all the clean stuff on the bench.

Same as people taking children to an activity but not doing any of the prep or clean up after.

I had a full on argument with my mum about this. She was raving about what a brilliant dad my sister’s husband is for taking their kids to the park. Kids got dressed by my sister. Given packed lunch by my sister. House tidied up after they’d gone by my sister. Dinner cooked by my sister. Kids put to bed by my sister. But he’s the brilliant dad because he’s taken them to the park.

We expect far too little of men.

I would be very pissed off OP. I would have made him a cup of tea with it. On a serious note though, it's also very dangerous not to mention disgusting.

Wow that’s gross. How lazy of him!

@PurpleDaisies

I had a full on argument with my mum about this. She was raving about what a brilliant dad my sister’s husband is for taking their kids to the park. Kids got dressed by my sister. Given packed lunch by my sister. House tidied up after they’d gone by my sister. Dinner cooked by my sister. Kids put to bed by my sister. But he’s the brilliant dad because he’s taken them to the park.

We expect far too little of men.

Yes. It's like men at at bbq joke. Woman makes all salads and prepares meat, lays table, organises drinks, guests, serves and cleans up after all while supervising kids. Man cooks meat on grill and gets standing ovation.

I’d be leaving it until he gets home.
Open the window, lots of air freshener and do your ablutions with your eyes shut.
What an absolute arse of a man,

@PurpleDaisies

I had a full on argument with my mum about this. She was raving about what a brilliant dad my sister’s husband is for taking their kids to the park. Kids got dressed by my sister. Given packed lunch by my sister. House tidied up after they’d gone by my sister. Dinner cooked by my sister. Kids put to bed by my sister. But he’s the brilliant dad because he’s taken them to the park.

We expect far too little of men.

God, my mum does this about my dh. Absolutely fawns every time he takes them swimming etc. Doesn't say a word when I do the same thing. My dh does pull his weight and when he's not working I'd say that duties are split pretty evenly (even if they're slightly different to work to our strengths). I don't think he deserves the absolute fawning by my mum. Once when I was quite heavily pregnant with ds2. I was tidying out ds1s playhouse in the garden while my mum was sitting there chatting to me. It was quite hard work bending down to get stuff out of it with a big bump and keeping an eye on ds1 playing in the garden. When dh finished work, he came into the garden to say hi and I asked if he could chuck a couple of things in the bin. My mum was immediately "ohhh poor dh having to clean up"

Surely if your child shits in the bath you get them out, clean it all up and run them a fresh bath, no?