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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be at the end of my tether with my cat

22 replies

abcsd · 11/11/2021 10:40

I have a seven year old cat who I love dearly but who has always been… a special boy

He doesn’t like to stray far so has always gone to the toilet in our garden rather than the neighbours, which is obviously a good thing. But in the last year or so he has stopped digging nice holes in the soil and taken to doing his business in the middle of our lawn.

We have a small garden and there is really no escaping it - and it’s stopping our young children being able to play there. I have to pick his mess up all the time and he’s got certain digestive issues so it goes everywhere!

I’ve tried remedies like putting citrus fruits down and am at the end of my tether!
My OH is even considering putting him up for adoption!

What do I do? AIBU to be at the end of my tether?

OP posts:
househuntinginthesouth · 11/11/2021 10:41

Could you get an outside litter tray?

GaiusHelenMohiam · 11/11/2021 10:42

Get a litter tray and keep him as an indoor cat?

My 13yo puss used to roam far and wide but she’s transitioned naturally into an indoor cat this year (she started shitting by the back door so we had to get the litter tray). She’s much happier.

Porcupineintherough · 11/11/2021 10:44

Sounds like he is marking the garden as his territory (burying faeces is what subordinate cats do). So yes annoying but its probably to warn off other neighbourhood cats who would otherwise be crapping there.

Saisong · 11/11/2021 10:45

Picking up after your pet does rather come with the territory. Have you explored any medical or psychological issues?

Otherwise agree with the above - create an easy toileting area that you can control - filled with fine gravel or similar.

Original poster
abcsd · 11/11/2021 10:46

This is all v interesting thanks!!

@househuntinginthesouth we have tried putting litter tray outside and also putting some of his litter in the soil to encourage him to go to the toilet there but it hasn’t really worked… and gets water logged if it rains. Although just thinking maybe I should pursue that again with a covered litter tray

OP posts:
herestoyoucolinrobinson · 11/11/2021 10:49

You need to turn over some soil somewhere so it's easy to dig like you're planning on planting something there. He will use it. You might have to act like you wanted to plant something there so he falls for it. 😂

SalsaLove · 11/11/2021 10:50

My 6 year old girl had terrible digestive issues until I put her on a largely raw diet and then she had no issues at all. Her poo is crumbly and there’s not much of it.

TaraR2020 · 11/11/2021 10:51

Has he been to the vets recently? Change in stools and toileting behaviour ought to be investigated for a medical cause.

CurseofChristmas · 11/11/2021 10:53

Make him a house cat. Problem solved.

Putting him up for adoption is ridiculous. Has he seen a vet for his digestive issues?

Original poster
abcsd · 11/11/2021 11:00

His stools haven’t changed - they’ve always been like this. He had a lot of health issues when he was younger because he was a rescue cat. I’ve also tried different diets over the years with varied success!

The theory about marking his territory is an interesting one, he’s had a lot of change to deal with recently with new babies etc

OP posts:
Hobbesmanc · 11/11/2021 11:01

People have to pick up after their dogs so if he is going on the lawn you just need to scoop it up. If its too loose then change his cat food

Rainbowstripes · 11/11/2021 11:07

I can't believe you are talking about rehoming him for pooing outside 😬 like others have said just pick it up before your children play outside and if it's loose try a different food or speak to the vet

Rainbowstripes · 11/11/2021 11:09

Sorry missed your post about you having tried different foods before - have you looked into whether it's an allergy or something? If that's the case maybe a specialist food would help

Starcaller · 11/11/2021 11:10

Adoption cos he craps on the lawn?! Confused

Just pick up before you go out, it takes seconds. We have a dog and a cat so I just do a quick lawn check before DD goes out. And if it's messy then change food. My old cat could only have fish-based foods or he would be unwell. Took some trial and error but we got there!

Original poster
abcsd · 11/11/2021 11:15

I’m not sure why his stools are so loose but they have been like that since he was a kitten and we’ve seen the vet about it previously. He even had to have part of his intestine removed. We’ve tried raw food/specialist brands etc but weirdly he does best with plain old Whiskas I think because that’s what he has when he was a baby so he’s been used to it over the years.
I wouldn’t mind picking the poo up but because it’s loose it smears itself all over the grass

Sounds like the best thing might be to try a covered litter tray outside and if that doesn’t work an indoor litter tray

I don’t really want to make him an indoor cat if possible because he’s used to being able to go in the garden and I think he would really miss it

OP posts:
Original poster
abcsd · 11/11/2021 11:17

Btw I won’t really put him up for adoption - I couldn’t do it…

OP posts:
mrsm43s · 11/11/2021 11:21

Typically cats bury their poo. Leaving it on display is a territorial act - he's clearly marking out that this garden is his territory - the scent acts as a deterrent to other cats. It will settle once the threat is removed, or a happy co-existing agreement has been established.

If its to do with another cat, they usually have a few unsettled months and battles for power, and then the hierarchy is established and everything goes back to normal. If it is related to a new baby, it'll probably settle once he gets used to the fact that this is his new normal, and the baby doesn't pose a threat. Don't get cross with him, and certainly don't rehome him, this is a sign that he is unsettled and insecure, nothing more. He needs more love and reassurance, and a bit of understanding.

ittakes2 · 11/11/2021 11:23

everytime you pick up his poo stick it in the place in the garden where you want him to poop.

user1471538283 · 11/11/2021 11:31

I think he is unsettled either by a baby or another cat. Cats are usually very clean so he is doing this as a territory marking thing. I would dig some holes for him to start him off again and leave the litter tray outside when it is dry.

When we moved our two hated being in but loved the constantly clean litter tray and then when they could go out DBoycat would come in to use it! I think it was just a case of settling down.

I think he will get over this. It just takes some patience.

Original poster
abcsd · 11/11/2021 11:33

Thanks for all the very helpful advice

OP posts:
Bpickle1 · 11/11/2021 12:09

YABVU this is part of looking after your cat, a home should be a forever home. Ridiculous talk of rehoming.

househuntinginthesouth · 11/11/2021 23:17

@abcsd

This is all v interesting thanks!!

@househuntinginthesouth we have tried putting litter tray outside and also putting some of his litter in the soil to encourage him to go to the toilet there but it hasn’t really worked… and gets water logged if it rains. Although just thinking maybe I should pursue that again with a covered litter tray

Sorry, didn't realise you had replied. You can get ones that are specifically for outdoor use, so shouldn't allow any rainwater in. Something like this maybe:

https://www.zooplus.co.uk/shop/cats/catlitterrlitterboxes/outdoorrcat_trays/588901

Hope you find something that works.

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