AIBU to go back on my new job change...

[pancakes22]

For the past 5-6 years I have moaned and moaned about wanting a new career that provides me with some satisfaction helping others and how much I dislike my boring job that I have plodded along in for more than a decade! I have done bits and bobs of voluntary work and have really enjoyed working with new mums and so have been looking at changing into some form of maternity care.

I have now got an interview for a maternity care assistant and should be over the moon - however instead I have just felt nauseous each day thinking about how childcare is going to work, am I going to impact my DS (2.5 years), how will I cope working a long shift and not seeing him before he wakes up and not getting home until hes asleep. It would be 2 days a week which is what I work currently but just the longer hours.

I know these are all core parts of the job, and I knew all this already - I just thought my motivation to help people and be part of NHS was enough to get through it. But now it is getting closer to being a reality I'm freaking out.

I am one to worry anyway and whenever I'm nervous it always affects my tummy. I just dont know if this is my gut instinct telling me I'm not ready to be without the little one, or whether this is just nerves in changing to something new as I haven't had a new job in 13 years and its a change in industry etc which of course is going to be scary and nerve wracking.

AIBU to have moaned all this time craving something new but to now say I dont want the job - which both feels like I'm putting family first but also feels like I'm chickening out of discovering what perhaps I may like to do - or do I go for it and hope that these worries ease as I get used to the longer hours/being away from the kids? The worry is I leave a stable job that I have flexiblity with and then if I dont like the new job then I cant go back and wouldn't be able to get the same job at the same salary etc. Change is always scary I suppose.

Go to the interview, find out more and make an informed decision. You can always decline later on if it’s not right and good interview practice whatever so might be good later on. Good luck!

Go to the interview, your nervousness for the interview and fear of rejection may be driving those thoughts, until you actually have the job you won't know how you really feel. If you get offered it your gut instinct of joy or despair will tell you!

It sounds like classic anxiety, because change can be stressful.

Things that have helped me out of this horrible pre-contemplation phase.

1. Talk to someone about your specific worries like childcare, having a solid plan and a sounding board from other peoples perspective really helps.

1. Make a decision, be confident that you are going to the interview so you get the full amount of information - you can always decline a job offer if the fit isn't right

1. Fresh air and brisk walk - especially if you're feeling panicky, practice some grounding techniques if your mind goes into washing machine mode. It's gets much easier with practice.

1. If you are starting to get lots of competing thoughts in your mind about what to do, write a pros and cons list and keep it handy if you start worrying.

This is really, really normal - and your reactions won't be this extreme forever, your gut will settle down.

It's only two days a week. Of course you'll cope! And you'll raise your confidence in yourself as a result instead of thinking you can't cope with things like that. You've wanted this a long time. Change is scary but it gets scarier by avoiding it, and less scary by going for it. So go for it. Good luck!