AIBU to consider a bilingual nursery for my child?

[RandomCatGenerator]

Hello everyone

I fully expect to get some comments telling me I’m a pretentious monster but also hoping for some personal experiences and balance! If I get a verdict that I am indeed going full PFB, so be it

I plan to start sending my son to nursery around 7 months old, when I return to work. We’re in West London and prices for nurseries are astronomical. For reference, it doesn’t seem unusual to be quoted £1800+ pcm for five days a week.

I’ve found two nurseries nearby that are bilingual - one is French and English, the other Mandarin and English. From when the kids are small, they talk to them, do circle time etc in both languages. The french one is £1600 pcm for five days, Mandarin is at the expensive end even for nurseries around me, at £1800 pcm. It’s also pretty inconvenient to get to by public transport - the french one is very convenient.

I always struggled with learning languages, DH has always found it easy and speaks three with fluency (so annoying!). I remember, when I was struggling as a teenager with lots of bilingual friends, I wished my parents had had me taught another language. And I figure nurseries are SO expensive, I may as well see if we can get the added benefit of the basics of another language.

On the other hand, he’s a tiny baby. And I don’t want to put pressure on him too. I just want him to be happy and have the best start in life.

Is it silly to consider sending a 7 month old to a bilingual nursery? What about when he’s 2 or 3?

If your husband speaks french and is prepared to speak it at home it's a no brainier for me.

I would love to have had the ability to raise mine bilingual.

I had a friend who is bilingual and tried to raise the children bilingual but as they were at an English speaking nursery full time and her husband only ever spoke in English to them she never really pushed the second language and it never really embedded much and it always felt like a wasted opportunity to me.

Yes, why not? Definitely choose the French one if your dh speaks French!

Go for it. I know someone who went to bilingual nursery from the age of 3, although only English was spoken at home. She is bilingual in the other language she learnt and really values it.

@RandomCatGenerator

Hello everyone

I fully expect to get some comments telling me I’m a pretentious monster but also hoping for some personal experiences and balance! If I get a verdict that I am indeed going full PFB, so be it

I plan to start sending my son to nursery around 7 months old, when I return to work. We’re in West London and prices for nurseries are astronomical. For reference, it doesn’t seem unusual to be quoted £1800+ pcm for five days a week.

I’ve found two nurseries nearby that are bilingual - one is French and English, the other Mandarin and English. From when the kids are small, they talk to them, do circle time etc in both languages. The french one is £1600 pcm for five days, Mandarin is at the expensive end even for nurseries around me, at £1800 pcm. It’s also pretty inconvenient to get to by public transport - the french one is very convenient.

I always struggled with learning languages, DH has always found it easy and speaks three with fluency (so annoying!). I remember, when I was struggling as a teenager with lots of bilingual friends, I wished my parents had had me taught another language. And I figure nurseries are SO expensive, I may as well see if we can get the added benefit of the basics of another language.

On the other hand, he’s a tiny baby. And I don’t want to put pressure on him too. I just want him to be happy and have the best start in life.

Is it silly to consider sending a 7 month old to a bilingual nursery? What about when he’s 2 or 3?

Send them to whichever nursery teaches a language your DH can speak. So they can practice at home. At that age you can only become multilingual if you are hearing and speaking languages being spoken fluently at home and school. And it could be a supreme waste of money otherwise.

Many children abroad start learning English at a very young age, so if your child has the opportunity to learn one before the age of 11 I'd go for it. Especially if your husband can also speak one of them.

I love learning foreign languages and wish it was something that was encouraged before I started high school.

@GoingForAWalk

People tend to put their DC in a bilingual school if they speak the language at home. Seems bizarre to do it otherwise.

It’s absolutely commonplace in Wales.

My children went to a bilingual nursery. Basically half the staff were Spanish. A few of the children were too so they did some games etc in Spanish.

Neither speak a word of it now lol. I think it would only have worked if we spoke the language at home too.

With that in mind, I'd see it as a bonus rather than something to pick a nursery for.

Besides, where has space. In my part of London you need to sign up to nursery when you get a positive test lol

@RobertaFirmino

Mandarin at 7 months old? Flamin' hell, mandarin segments maybe...

I mean there are plenty of Chinese babies who manage it at 7 months. No reason a British one couldn’t.

Earlier the better

Bilingualism has massive beneficial effects.

unuhi.com/10-benefits-of-being-bilingual/

The most important point to consider is what is the level of French /Mandarin of the person speaking to your child?

Because it's all well and good saying it's a bilingual nursery, but are they native speakers? Or more GCSE level French from someone born and raised in the UK?

I think this is great if you also like the nursery in lots of other ways, but it wouldn't be what I used as my main criterion in picking a nursery. I'm always a bit wary of nurseries that have lots of things that appeal to parents - fancy sounding menus, activities that sound amazingly educational but don't mean much to babies like yoga - because it's not the parent that's going there, it's the baby, and at worst it can seem a bit cynical. Go for the nursery that seems the warmest environment, where the staff seem to care for the children and don't have a huge turnover. If that's the one that's bilingual (and obviously it might be, these things aren't mutually exclusive) then great, but don't compromise on any of that so that your baby does circle time in French or Mandarin.

of other ways, but it wouldn't be what I used as my main criterion in picking a nursery. I'm always a bit wary of nurseries that have lots of things that appeal to parents - fancy sounding menus, activities that sound amazingly educational but don't mean much to babies like yoga - because it's not the parent that's going there, it's the baby, and at worst it can seem a bit cynical. Go for the nursery that seems the warmest environment, where the staff seem to care for the children and don't have a huge turnover.

This. I’d also perhaps be a bit wary, with slightly older kids especially, of choosing a nursery where all/most of the other kids attending are French, Chinese or anything else because you may find yourself excluded from the social side of things.

It’s absolutely commonplace in Wales.

That’s what I was thinking. English speaking parents send their kids to Welsh nursery in Wales, English speaking parents send their kids to Gaelic nursery in Scotland, so choosing a French nursery in London doesn’t seem so out there after all. Especially if cheaper and more convenient and your DH also speaks French.

Why would this be unreasonable? I'm enrolling my DC in a bilingual nursery because it's extremely good for their development

What's going to happen when he leaves nursery? Will these language skills be kept up at home, and are they necessary? Primary school will teach absolutely nothing in relation to languages, and then you'll likely find he has to learn a completely different language at high school. Unless it's something you'll use in your day to day life beyond nursery, it's pointless.

YANBU

I would pick mandarin over French (and I’m fluent in French) because it will be much more useful in the future.

Try to stimulate that outside nursery, maybe by having play dates with other kids from the nursery, watching cartoons in Mandarin, baby sitter rhat speaks mandarin. Etc

Is your husband actually French? I very much doubt he’ll speak French to your child if not. 7 months seems a bit early. You need to be very consistent at home. My French native speakers tend not to speak French outside of their home. I’d massively advocate for bilingualism, but I’m not sure you’re going to manage unless your dh is totally on board and properly fluent.

No he isn’t french - so he could speak french at home but wouldn’t choose to necessarily. It wouldn’t be by any means the natural language he’d speak at home. But he does have a high standard of it.

What's the point unless you are going to France or China. I think it's cruel

Cruel? What?! Why?

The way the world is going, Mandarin will probably be the language of business by the time the child is grown.

Sounds like a great idea although as PP said it wouldn't be the only factor.
I wouldn't go out of my way to go to the mandarin one for example as juggling work and childcare is complicated enough without making your daily journey complicated too.

I can't see any disadvantages to your child really, and it's certainly not cruel.

I think the french nursery you're talking about is the one near where I used to live!

If I still lived in the area I'd send my DD's there without a second thought. I speak enough french to hold a conversation so I could speak it at home. Plus, it's cheaper. What's not to like?

Yes I would send my dc to bilingual nursery. Its great to immerse them in an additional language from so young. The fact your dh speaks french is a bonus. In NI there are many nurseries where children are taught through Irish and many of the parents don't speak it but it doesn't stop the dc from learning it.

I wish my children had had this opportunity. Go for it!