Moving house to a different area.

[RedFlagsAllOver]

I currently live in Devon, In a very small town. I moved here when my eldest son was 4. He's now 14, I also have a 12 year old and 4 year old. I've always hated it here. Never made any friends really, people stick together and I've always felt like an outsider. I've stayed because I didn't want to move away from my elderly dad. In the future I would really like to move away completely. Away from all the sad memories and hopefully somewhere that has a good bus route or trains, near something because here is so boring and I feel like I've been putting my life on hold. My question is though am I being awful for wanting to move my boys somewhere new, and if I do when would be the best time with school and future education. My boys Don't have lots of friends, they Don't socialise outside of school.

I thought it was only me that hated living in Devon! I found it unfriendly and there was no social life. I did often wonder if it was just the part of Devon where I was and that maybe a move to the Exeter area would have been fine. Perhaps if you move somewhere like Exeter or Plymouth with better links then your DS will not be too far from their friends but will be somewhere that has more to offer.

For timing, definitely think about how changing schools may impact on their GCSEs. You may be better waiting until the 12yo has done his GCSE year and then move before A Levels or college, and the youngest will still be in Junior so not an issue.

Actually I'm only an hour away from Exeter but the house prices even rent shoots right up. When I tell people I live in Devon they say oh beautiful. But I hate it. I think in my heart I want to be somewhere busy

Yup I'm with you on how much people stick together in Devon. I moved to Devon and met my husband and we are staying in Devon purely as his folks are getting older. Have you thought about heading up towards Bristol?

Sorry to here this. Was in a similar situation in the South West, including the elderly and ill parent thing. Not so much people ' stuck together' for me, it was just hard to fit in. Anyways, I left.. Back in London now. If you're sad they'll know.
Looking at their ages I'd say plan to move when your 18 year old is off to uni or college or work). Then the next in line should be post GCSE and can start fresh at a 6th form college. The little one is more portable.

Yes same really I've never felt like I fit it. I know 1 lady because our boys grew up together but we aren't really friends.
I'm 40 now and I don't want to waste my life like my poor dad has. Sat at home getting more and more fed up. I was planning on looking for another job once youngest started school but things have snowballed regarding my dads health. My mum is 17 years younger and has a partner. Im sure she wouldn't be happy if we moved but she also never visits and it's always me that goes to her.

I would go now, you sound so sad that I can't imagine anyone is going to benefit from staying longer - there will always be an excuse to stay but that's because you aren't really thinking about yourself at all. Having a happy mum and a social life is important for kids too.