Bit deep for a Saturday night ……

[Queserasera30]

My family dynamics are horrendous. In the last five years it’s totally fallen apart and frankly unsalvageable. Part of me wants to start a family with my partner but the other part of me thinks if I bring a child into this world they will be missing out on “family”.
I have friends but not best friends. It’s me, my partner and our dog. I look at others and they are surrounded by family and friends and I am jealous. I don’t wanna have a child who has no one around them. My partner keeps telling me, we will build a family unit and it will be unlike the shit shows we grew up in. But I’m scared. No I’m petrified.
Can you do it without the support of parents? Can you do it without friends around you ? I’m so lost. I’m 30 and my friends around me have kids and starting families and I feel like theirs something wrong with me for not feeling the same. But no one understands what I’ve been through.

Can you afford therapy op? Yes you can have kids without wider support, and some support will be easier to find once you have kids, but it sounds like you might benefit from dealing with some of that trauma before you start

My family dynamics are a bit skewed but I still have a somewhat close relationship with my parents and my sisters and gran. It's the more extended family I don't like. My little unit is myself, my son, my oh and my ever faithful puppup and we do just fine. Please don't let the fact you have a small unit put you off you can give a baby just as much love with you, your oh and your dog if not more as it's unconditional

Yes you can. I moved countries as I have no one here. OH is mostly no contact with his.

We moved right before I became pregnant so had no friends or knew anyone really.

DD is fine, very popular, lots of friends, gets invited everywhere etc. I had to put the effort in when she was little, to organise playdates, parties trips to the park etc but it's all paying off now. Her being a good kid(mostly luck) helped too.

We managed(somehow) and she's thriving.