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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to feel rather peeved that I cannot see my own child perform at nativity play as apparently one had to buy tickets in advance and no-one told me!

28 replies

Yulemoonfiend · 12/12/2007 17:33

My child is a Narrator. Last I heard was they were charging £2 donation for charity. Fine by me, No mention of tickets or having to buy in advance.
It is held in a church, never been any restrictions on numbers. Today I find out that one had to buy them in advance and I didn't know and now all tickets are sold out and, for the first time ever, there is a limit of 100 people for the 2 shows. I am very upset and fuming.

When I tried to talk about it in the office, I got a very sniffy ''OTHER people managed to work it out, MrsFMF...'' from the receptionist.

FFS. How do I tell my child neither parent nor grandparents will be there to witness the shining performance...?

OP posts:
YuleLoveHekateAtSolstice · 12/12/2007 17:36

Did they not send a letter home in the bags then? Are many of the parents at your school psychic....

Original poster
Yulemoonfiend · 12/12/2007 17:39

I swear I have seen no letter other than the one where they said t'would be a £2 donation...and I do check the bags...(I daren't not, for my children have a habit of keeping unsavoury things int heir book bags...)

OP posts:
YuleLoveHekateAtSolstice · 12/12/2007 17:43

Ask if you can see the dress rehersal?

is that how you spell rehersal?

rehersal
rehearsel
rehearsal

LittleSleighBellasRinging · 12/12/2007 17:51

No YANBU

I'm continually peeved by crap communication from my DS's school.

We were told that the lower school's carol service was today. So I arranged to work from home so that I could go. Today I found out that as my DS is in a mixed class, although his year is in the lower school, his class has been allocated to the upper school's carol service, which is tomorrow... when I have scheduled a meeting, which everyone else wanted today but I said I couldn't make because of DS's carol service. So now I ahve to miss it to go to the meeting. I expect they thought I'd know or should know their peculiar categorisation. In most other walks of life, people think they need to tell people things before they expect them to know them. Ho hum.

nametaken · 12/12/2007 18:02

YANBU - is this your son's first nativity and the other parents more "in the know" than you are - did they snap up the tickets on the quiet.

I don't think its on - for one thing the first 100 people get tickets, why is it fair for someone to buy 6 or 8 tickets say for parents, siblings and grandparents and then someone like you can't even get 1. If ticket numbers are going to be limited then it should be limited to 2 per child, not first 100 takers.

Honestly you've made me feel mad on your behalf LOL - I feel like standing outside that blardy church with a placard!!!!!!!!!!!

I honestly think if it were me I would either not send my ds or just go anyway and say I'm going to see the nativity - get over it.

Let us know what happens in the end.

Saturn74 · 12/12/2007 18:06

What a shame.
I'd be furious.
And what a rude and annoying receptionist!

how would their nativity go if the narrator's mother took him out to Pizza Express instead of dropping him off at church?>>

currantbunmum · 12/12/2007 18:08

DD,s school is really tiny, 37, and so the building is also quite small. They allocate 2 tickets per family for the main evening performance, but a free for all for the afternoon, Sunday Church performance.

This seems more than fair to us.

Hope you manage to wangle a seat.

Original poster
Yulemoonfiend · 12/12/2007 18:22

Humph - it did cross my mind....
DH is feeling VERY stroppy and has decided to turn up anyway - armed with the last crap letter where it mrentioned the donation. I howeverm, am a (very new) parent governor so don't want to piss off anyone too much.

See that's the itrritation, I am not a new mum. Apparently some of the reception mums heard about the ticket thing and told their chums...and so on. But I am an old-timer who slinks into playground seconds before the kids get chucked out and i often have my mps on

Is it asking too much for a letter home?? Loads of parents don't pick up their kids at home-time and rely on communications from the school, not sodding word of mouth.
Still

OP posts:
Original poster
Yulemoonfiend · 12/12/2007 18:24

oh, and my child is obviously very excited about being a narrator, I have to let them take part. So much work and pride has gone into this.

OP posts:
mykidsmum · 12/12/2007 18:25

that is really, really terrible I am on your behalf.

LittleSleighBellasRinging · 12/12/2007 18:26

You mean they didn't actually send a letter home?

Sorry, but I'd be complaining. It's one thing a letter going missing, it's quite another having no letter at all. It isn't troublemaking to demand that schools communicate effectively with parents.

nutcracker · 12/12/2007 18:27

I would go anyway and say you will stand at the back. Unless they want to lose their narrator they won't say no.

edam · 12/12/2007 18:28

Yule, if it's in a CofE church I'm not sure they can turn you away - it's a public building and if it's open has to be accessible to anyone who wants to pop in for a quick pray, as it were.

Shoddy behaviour from the school, do hope you'll be taking this up with the head.

Original poster
Yulemoonfiend · 12/12/2007 18:30

eDAM!! yESSS!!!! THANKS!

(removes cap locks, sorry)

OP posts:
PrettyCandlesAndTinselToo · 12/12/2007 18:32

How very aggravating!

They have told you you need to buy tickets - but incredibly unclearly. Charities use "£x donation" on their tickets because they don't pay tax on donations, but income from sales is treated differently somehow. I don't know whether schools are in the same position, though.

But they should, at the same time as asking for donation, have specified that ticket nos were limited and had to be booked in advance. Very unfair. I'd kick up a fuss - noy sbout the 'donation', but about no notification of numbers. And I'd turn up on the night, I'm sure other parents will.

Saturn74 · 12/12/2007 18:33

I would have thought school governors should get specially reserved seats on the front row?

FrannyandZooey · 12/12/2007 18:34

I agree that tickets should be limited so that there was enough for every parent to come

I mean even if you had known about the ticket thing, and got there in time, someone else would have missed out, presumably, if there's only a finite amount and they have all gone

really sorry for you - these things mean a lot

Original poster
Yulemoonfiend · 12/12/2007 18:36

I suppose normal governors do...
I'm sure there was much tutting etc by receptionist when I was voted in. I'm not the usual 'type' you see....

OP posts:
aPartridgeInapAeroTree · 12/12/2007 18:40

I'd be fuming. I'm already peeved that we can only watch the dress rehearsal as we have no choice but to take ds2. The KS1 childen are doing two performances. One for parents only and one for parents and young children. KS2 ane only doing one performance for parents only, but younger siblings can go to the dress rehearsal! Hmph, but am resigned to it.

I'd have a word with the HT and see if an exception can be made as it's not your fault there's been a communication breakdown. They should be able to at least provide yourself and dh with tickets. Is the church not a public building after all and a place of worship which welcomes everyone. I can't see how they can place such a restriction on numbers in a church. Possibly for insurance purposes etc!

edam · 12/12/2007 19:17

Glad to have been of help. Hope it works!

nametaken · 12/12/2007 19:30

why aren't you a normal governor?????????

You hav'nt (shock horror) got a tattoo have you?

Original poster
Yulemoonfiend · 12/12/2007 20:35

Nametaken: No, I'm just a scruffy, non-professional hippy-type. I played the friendly and approachable card on the voting form, while others banged on about their IT skills, business credentials, their numerous treasurer-in-the-community skills and their impeccable record of involvement in all things school-related. I can sense the receptionist's disapproval every time I am late handing in school-trip money....

Well, sort of hoorah. A friend has given me her ticket (she is poorly) so I can go but not dh or grandma.

I am still incensed at the lack of proper communication though. I may email the HT (after I've worked out whether it was just me who didn't get a letter or not.)

OP posts:
deste · 12/12/2007 20:39

Glad to see you've got a ticket but I would have just turned up anyway. There would have been a seat somewhere. There always is.

Original poster
Yulemoonfiend · 12/12/2007 20:46

I'm leaving that to DH who is adamant he is just turning up for the evening performance....He's going to say he needs to commune with Our Lord....

OP posts:
Doodledootoo · 12/12/2007 20:46

Message withdrawn

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