GP and "Lady Bits".

[LadyJJ]

I had a phone consultation with a GP earlier regarding my HRT (patches and topical oestrogen).
Throughout the consultation she referred to my vagina/vulva as my "Lady Bits ".
It felt very odd, I used the anatomical words.
AIBU to expect a doctor not to use weird euphemisms?

[quote LadyJJ]@ahfuck foofoo is much worse.

I am an HCP but in much different role, so rarely have to discuss sexual health so maybe it would make a difference if I did it every day.
Yes I do think it's weird and uncomfortable to be discussing sexual health with a professional that uses child like euphemisms.
I just found the whole thing odd, like seeing a Podatrist who referred to your feet as Tootsies the whole time.[/quote]
It was awful, I remember the twice I had to see her I walked out utterly desperate to shower if that makes sense, I felt so uncomfortable. I remember thinking it was the oddest job for her to have if she was so uncomfortable she had to talk like that; she was meant to be a psychosexual counselling trained doctor and yet basic vocab seemed totally lost on her . Given the discussion we kind of needed to talk about for example masturbation; she was considerably more embarrassed than I was . Long story short GP encouraged me to complain loudly and afaik she doesn’t have that job anymore.

Down below, down there, fair enough - my GP always said down below in conversation (sadly mine has been topic of conversation for years as I’ve had endless problems with it!) but foofoo is ridiculous . There are two extremes though - I remember another appt where they repeatedly referred to introitus/fourchette and having to go home and google what they meant …

However you just know they wouldn’t have turned round to a man experiencing problems with his penis and asked him if his winkie was hurting - it’s infantilising and patronising !!!

I suppose it's just not possible to please everyone because everyone has different preferences. I wouldn't care which words were used really.

@fourminutestosavetheworld

I suppose it's just not possible to please everyone because everyone has different preferences. I wouldn't care which words were used really.

Spot on.

As a HCP you should be able to switch language to communicate with your client. It is sometimes hard to get it right especially if less experienced. Feedback helps. Gently let her know.

Quite surprised by some of these responses. It's nothing to do with patient preferences, it's to do with anatomically/medically correct terms.

Having a UTI vs. thrush vs. a painful vulva are all totally different things, and if you don't use the correct language how are you supposed to know which of your 'lady bits' hurt, and why?!

I think it's fine for a doctor to use informal words initially, to be sure that they're understood, but if the patient is using the correct terms then continuing to talk about their tummy or lady bits does seem inappropriate and patronising. And there's no excuse for terms that are both babyish and vague, or just unpleasant like 'front bottom'

Agree with a lot of posters - GP s are probably used to using language more of their patients are more comfortable with. And you might be in s minority.
A lot of people I speak to do but know the difference between a vulva and a vagina.
It's more important to use something your patient can understand and use than the dictionary correct term which has different meanings for different people.

I have been seeing GP for similar stuff over the last few months (it's getting better - have finally been able to wear jeans this week, first time in months 🎉🎉🎉).

GP's go to phrase is "down there" - but she does pick up on my language and switch into vulva etc.

I also get hacked off with the Q & A of the econsult software.
"do you have abdominal pain?" "yes" "where is it" "it;s in my abdomen, that's why I ticked yes, I have abdominal pain
The other gem, given that it kicks off by asking date of birth, is "why do you think your periods have stopped" - because I'm 60?
I have very low tolerence levels when I'm not feeling well.

There's no problem with a GP using euphemisms with patients who prefer them, provided the meaning is clear. Doctors should use language that patients like and understand.

The issue here is that your doctor wasn't mirroring the words you were using, or picking up on your frustration. You used anatomical language, but the GP persisted with euphemisms that you didn't like.

GPs are exceptionally busy and stressed, so perhaps she wasn't at her best. Phone consultations also mean the GP can't see your face and has to rely on tone of voice, pauses etc. to read your emotions.

But I would make a mental note that this GP may tend to stick with what's familiar, and may not be brilliant at listening. The first point isn't a bad characteristic in a GP I think - there's something to be said for concentrating on what you can do well. The second one can be a problem, as listening is a huge part of a GP's job. Patients can try to compensate for some gaps in a GP's listening skills by being good communicators themselves, but you're not being unreasonable if you think it would be better if you didn't have to.

If you aren't sure whether to stick with her, you could consider talking to your GP at your next appointment about the language that works best for you. The way she reacts will tell you a lot about how flexible and responsive to patients this GP is able to be.

@baroqueandblue

This reminds me that last year I went into our surgery to book an appointment. It was a little busy so when the receptionist asked me why I needed to see the GP, I thought quickly and said "It's a problem to do with my... undercarriage." She actually yelped back a laugh.

I still have no idea why I used that particular word 😄

"Roger Heathrow control, cleared for take off. Set flaps to 40 degrees, increase revs....Victor one, Rotate. "

@CardiganAddict

Agree with a lot of posters - GP s are probably used to using language more of their patients are more comfortable with. And you might be in s minority. A lot of people I speak to do but know the difference between a vulva and a vagina. It's more important to use something your patient can understand and use than the dictionary correct term which has different meanings for different people.

When I was manager in a gp surgery in Scotland "the wee man (boy) has a sore wee man(penis)"

@IsleofRum I love Scottish language 🤣
Reminds me when I was waiting for my daughter and her friend (with Scottish parents) to leave the house. They suddenly disappeared.
My daughter passed on the message: "she's busy doing a wee jobbie"
🤣

I just couldn’t get annoyed by this. She probably speaks to so many people per week that this is what she’s got use to saying. Honestly, if this is the only thing you’ve got to worry about them think yourself lucky.

I would find it weird. Partly because it’s so infantile, partly because it’s unclear and could refer to any number of things, partly because you were using the anatomical terms so had clearly indicated you were comfortable with that, and partly because I don’t think any doctor would be so coy as refer to a patient’s ‘gentleman bits’ - it reinforces the age-old idea that women’s sexual functions are dirty and embarrassing.

I needed a lot of gynaecological treatment after the birth of my son and I don’t remember any doctor ever using any words other than the correct ones (possibly because there was a need to be very specific about which part of my ‘lady bits’ we were talking about).