Play Dates and Favourite Toys, I don’t think I’m UR?

[PlayDateURMe]

DD had a play date last night with her best friend from school. Yesterday morning I told her to put her 3 favourite toys away in my room out of the way.

They all have special meaning to her:

• Her favourite cannot sleep without teddy
• A soft toy bought by her Year 2 teacher and classmates when she had some medical treatment (Some of the children will have put money in for the toy as there's been a similar collection recently for another child for similar reasons)
• A ragdoll handmade by her great grandmother (who died last year so will never be able to make another or see DD play with it again – it’s played with daily usually, if DD ruined it I’d be sad but think it’s one of those things, another child is different).

The girls are 7, Year 3. I thought this was perfectly reasonable thing to do, put away toys we don’t want messed with. There were literally loads of other toys from all categories to play with including dolls and soft toys.

According to the friends mum I am very UR for not letting DD show all her toys to her DD, as her DD might have wanted to play with them. Apparently when DD went to their house a few weeks ago all her friends toys where out for DD to play with. She says it doesn’t show DD as a very good friend if she doesn’t trust her friend to not damage her things.

For added context both DD and her friend have SN (different SNs but still), her friend can be quite rough, not intentionally or maliciously but because of her SN but I would have put these 3 toys away whether it was this girl or another child coming for a playdate.

So AIBU to have put the toys away?

It's a good idea to put precious toys out of sight for playdates. I always did this.

I never quite got over taking DS1 (8) and DS2 (2) to visit a friend who had a son also aged 2. His father had helpfully put all his child's toys in a playpen where my DS2 could see them but was not allowed to touch. DS1 was allowed into the garden after being told that he was not allowed to touch any of the toys that were out there. He did, however, give each of the boys half a rich tea finger to eat.

I used to do this & I used to hide a little wooden spatula because the visiting child used to pretend it was a dagger & did fake stabbing!!

It's all a bit of a storm in a tea cup. The Mum getting all arsey about it is really odd and OTT to send a text about it.

I always used to put away special/ favourite toys that I knew mine would be unhappy about sharing fully, or if they had sentimental value and could get damaged. That way everything else is free game. I find it really bizarre that she texted you - it’s fairly standard play date behaviour