Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you get a babysitter for 13 year olds?

56 replies

ohtsmeagain · 05/11/2021 18:27

I have a 13 year old, sensible, he likes staying home alone if I occasionally go to supermarket or gym in the daytime but I'm always home by 7pm and usually well earlier.

It's been almost two years since I've been out in the evening due to Covid but am now thinking about going on during the week once a month for drinks so wouldn't get home til 1130/midnight.

At what age do you stop getting babysitters for this? Personally I was actually working as a babysitter myself by the age of 13 but times have changed.

OP posts:
reluctantbrit · 05/11/2021 19:58

DD was left alone for a couple of hours, we always ensured the neighbours were aware and happy to helpf if necessary.

We checked in a couple of times though.

A babysitter is a bit over the top tbh. We arranged sleepovers from 10 onwards if we needed/had to/wanted a night out and would take her friends with the same understanding.

vickyc90 · 05/11/2021 20:05

I'm 31 at 13 I was home alone until 11:30ish quite frequently and enjoyed it. I would just leave junk food as a treat for them and maybe put your phone on vibrate in your pocket in case of emergency

YoungGiftedPlump · 05/11/2021 20:09

At 13 I was babysitting children!

ulez · 05/11/2021 20:12

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

peppersauce1984 · 05/11/2021 20:52

I was babysitting babies - like 6 month old twins at 13. Totally wrong when I think back. But at 13 if they're sensible yes fine to leave them, if you're local.

caringcarer · 05/11/2021 20:59

I would get a sitter until child was at least 14.

DDMAC · 05/11/2021 21:10

I’ve left my 12 year old during the day for a run to the supermarket or an errand but not at night, we get a babysitter the rare time we go out. He and his ten year old sister would be too nervous on their own at night

CloseYourEyesAndSee · 05/11/2021 21:13

My DS is 13 and doesn't mind being left in the evening but wouldn't want to put himself to bed with me not home, so if I want to go out late he has a sleepover with friends usually. I can be back 9.30/10 which he has fine with.

TurnUpTurnip · 05/11/2021 21:14

Absolutely not, I would never afford to go out getting baby sitters for a 13 year old 😅

Farcry66 · 05/11/2021 21:16

I leave my son for things like that and he is 13. Mind you, he especially enjoys it when my friends all come back with me and we carry on with karaoke till the early hours!

maofteens · 05/11/2021 21:18

I was the babysitter at 12! Really, that was the age considered ok to look after little kids. My mum was in the neighbourhood just in case but don't recall ever calling her. My worst job was what I thought was twins turned out to be a sleepover party for five! Might have been 14 by then though.

Athrawes · 05/11/2021 21:27

In NZ kids have to be 14 before they are legally allowed to be left alone at home. Crazy!

amy85 · 05/11/2021 21:29

My 12 year old babysits his 2 younger siblings so I can go the gym in the evening...so I wouldn't even consider getting a babysitter for him....but guess it all depend on the child

Newmum29 · 05/11/2021 21:46

I used to babysit at 13 for other families so no I wouldn’t

HarrisMcCoo · 05/11/2021 21:53

Yes, I would leave my 13yo.

verymiddleaged · 05/11/2021 22:07

In NZ kids have to be 14 before they are legally allowed to be left alone at home. Crazy!

The same in my USA state, it drives us nuts. Roll on 14!

MangoIce · 05/11/2021 22:30

Maybe not a babysitter, but it would be better if he slept over at a friend’s house.

MyDcAreMarvel · 05/11/2021 22:36

I no wouldn’t leave a 13 year old alone past about 8pm. But then I would get a babysitter either. Just wait a couple of years before you go on nights out it’s not long.

FrankButchersDickieBow · 05/11/2021 22:42

Feed him before you go and text him when it's bed time

Pmsl. As if. "Time for bed now son. It's 10.30"

"Okay mum. Now you have texted me that from the pub, I will immediately turn off all my devices, stop whatsapping my friends and shall go straight to sleep" 😆😆

Personally I wouldn't leave them till midnight. I would probably change plans to go for tea, a few drinks and home by 10pm at the very latest.

EmeraldShamrock · 05/11/2021 22:45

Depending on the DC.
If he is independent and you're close enough for an emergency he'd be okay.
I'd probably invest in a ring door for added security.

Wigeon · 05/11/2021 22:53

We’ve just had this issue - going to be 1.5hrs away, leaving about 5.30pm, returning probably 11/11.30pm, and the 13 yr old’s 10yr old sister is also at home.

Decided to pay a local 17/18yr old to be there for the evening. Mostly because the 13 and 10yr olds wind each other up hugely, but won’t with a “guest” in the house…

MissCreeAnt · 05/11/2021 22:55

I think it should be fine to leave him at that age, as long as he is relaxed about it, but personally we haven't left ours home alone past 10pm yet.

minionsrule · 05/11/2021 23:14

I think its ok provided that if he gets nervous as it gets later he can contact you and you agree to go straight home.
Its not just about being safe, its him about him being ok with it. He might think its cool but as it gets later he may get scared. Even as a 16 year old I hated going to bed if everyone was out as you hear all the little creaks and sounds.

Nearlytheretrees · 05/11/2021 23:20

At 13 I liked to be home when DC went to bed

AuditAngel · 05/11/2021 23:30

It depends on the child. My now 17 yo would have been happy with this, my now 11 yo would be happy with this (I would leave her earlier in the evening, but not this late) but my 14 yo hates being alone in the evening,