Waiting 6months for house, shall we walk away?

[halfwaytomadeit]

We are now 6months into the home buying process. The seller is buying an already completed new build and we have no property to sell as we have moved in with family. The property has been completed since August.
The date has been pushed back twice so far and now they are reluctant to give any date at all, as the seller's solicitor is still waiting for legal enquiries from the new build company. They have been waiting for these enquiries for the last 5 weeks with no updates. Last week we asked if the seller would be willing to come to an agreement to move from the property in order to prevent the sale falling through (our mortgage expires in January and we have had a change of circumstances since initial application), but the seller is unwilling to do this and has threatened to find another buyer as she feels 'stressed' and 'under pressure' due to us suggesting this.
Our valuation also runs out in January so even if the mortgage company were happy with our change of financial circumstances, we would have to wait for another valuation on the property. We might also need another survey as there is extensive structural work needed to the house which has now been left unattended to for 4months since initial survey (damp, rotten structural support, minor subsidence)

There is no date in sight and the seller is, in our opinion, unwilling to come to any agreement or show any degree of flexibility - they just want us to work around them and what is easiest for them. We are also paying over the valuation cost for the property which the seller knows.
We have got until 12th December for cut off for legal completion, and we cannot continue to live with family beyond Christmas, as at that point it will have been 8+ months. We have also had furniture in storage for a significant period of time.

Would it be unreasonable to walk away if we don't have a date set in the next two weeks?

Are we being unreasonable wanting a date/seller to find alternative accommodation if the sale isn't completed by the 12th December date?

If the seller wants the sale she should be completing on her sale with you and renting

I would put that to them, and if they won’t pull out, rent somewhere yourself and start looking elsewhere

How would you go about trying to negotiate coming to some sort of agreement with the seller - via agent or solicitor?

AIBU to ring estate agent and solicitor everyday at this point? I am at my wit's end.

Op if they look for another buyer it will take many many more months for them - you hold the strong hand here. They are being totally unreasonable - and it's also very wrong of the estate agent to criticise you in any way.

I would stop discussing and just state they are the ones who will need to move out and rent if they want this to go ahead - and then really do pull out.

I think negotiating isn't going to work is it? This person seems impervious to your attempts to work out a solution. I think you need to have clear boundaries - state that you want an exchange or completion date by XX or you are pulling out as you won't be able to complete after that date because your mortgage will have to be renegotiated. Don't discuss, just set out what your boundaries are.

Could you go and see the agent in person? Remember of course they work for the vendor, but it is very much in their interest that the sale goes through. Perhaps if you look them in the eye you could stress that you are serious and get them on your side.

You can't negotiate. So be clear, call the estate agent again, you need to be completed and in the house by x date or your mortgage deal runs out. You aren't convinced this vendor actually wants to sell, and is just stringing you along until you have to back out, so they don't have to pay the estate agent. So say you are leaving your offer on the table until x date, but after that the sale can't go through at this price. Say you are looking at other properties as you dont really think this sale will happen and if you find anything more suitable before the vendor exchanges, you'll pull out of sale.

Essentially, make the estate agent realise if they don't put pressure on the vendor to sort this out, they will lose their fee. In my experience, estate agents are very money motivated.