Hi there, I would genuinely appreciate some advice here, as I'm sure that I am not Being, but I have a tiny nagging bit of doubt, that I may be being entitled, I don't know if I am, or if I'm being manipulated to think that may be the case.
It's my daughters birthday on Sunday, the way my partner and I approach what gifts to get is that we make a list firstly including what has been asked for if appropriate, then things we'd like to get. We then go through what our budget is and if the list goes over budget then we prioritise.
This year in the list was a bundle of four children's 150 piece jigsaws. We chose to get her these as something my daughter and I enjoy together is doing jigsaws in the evening after the baby has gone to bed. We do this every night, and the ones she has no longer challenge her at all.
A couple of weeks ago MIL asked what gift to get for DD. I initially my partner and I suggested things that hadn't made the final cut... we suggested a firefighter costume, she didn't want to get it. Then we suggested magnetic tiles, she didn't want to get these. We suggested an art set, a doll, a science experiment kit, and loads of other things... for all of them she said no. Then asked if there was anything else.
We then moved in to suggestion from the gifts we intended to but her, a paw patroller, a dance game for our switch, a movie, an easel, some bored games... all no
So we suggested the jigsaws, I sent her the link so she could have a look, explained I intended to order that day, so please let me know as if not we were getting them. She said she'd like to get them for DD
Fast forward to seeing her a few days ago, she tells me when my partner left the room (as she does with everything), that the jigsaws had been delivered and she thought they were lovely.., she's going to give DD them but keep two at her house...
It really annoyed me, I have a thing about people not giving a child a gift and stating they can only have it in a place of the givers choosing. Which she knows, and I explained again. I'm also irritated that this is a gift that we intended to but our daughter, she didn't want to get anything else as it was either too boyish (!), or too messy etc. If I had known she'd decide to keep two, I wouldn't have made the suggestion.
My partner called her last night and explained that he was annoyed as she's taken a gift that we were going to get and then changed the gift (the jigsaws can not be bought individually at the moment, so she knows we can't get the other two). She told him it was ridiculous and two jigsaws is more than enough, and that wat she'd have something to enjoy with DD, but to keep peace she'll acquiesce to give 3 and keep one.
If she had been out off her own back and picked some jigsaws for DD, and then saw a couple of others and though "oh they're nice jigsaws that I like and that DD would enjoy doing with me".... not a problem
But what she's done just feels a little wrong to me, and I'd really like to know if it's a me problem, or if other people would be annoyed too
Also just before it's asked, no she does not intend to save two for Christmas and no money is in no way an issue to her
Anyhow, I'd really appreciate some outside perspective as it's really niggling me. Thank you x