AIBU to ask you to tell me where to live?

[rainwindsunsnow]

Because I cannot decide

DH and I are mid-late 20s. No children yet but hoping to start trying next year. We both work from home so can live anywhere. The budget is around 600k and we are looking for 2-3 beds. We are not too fussy about flat vs. house, we are more concerned about choosing the right area.

We currently live in Edinburgh after moving up here for DH's job some years ago. We both love the city. We are very lucky to live in a pretty flat with a 20-minute walk to the city centre. We have ample access to museums, galleries, shops, parks, historic buildings, etc. We have easy access to some great countryside, the coast, and the airport. DH's family lives close by and we see them a fair bit. I particularly love how walkable the city is; I can walk for hours through pretty, quirky suburbs and countryside before hitting any main roads or industrial estates.

However ...

We are a long way from my family. I have parents on the south coast and two siblings in London. We would like to be back closer to my family when we have children. DH is happy with this as he went to university in Oxford and has lots of friends in the south.

However, we cannot settle on an area. I've yet to find anywhere that appeals as much as Edinburgh and house prices are scarily high.

We've been looking at:

• Winchester (beautiful but too expensive? too quiet?)
• Oxford (unsure what it is like to actually live here?)
• Cambridge (similar to Winchester?)
• London (destined to be out of our price range?)
• Brighton and Chichester (unsure what it is like to actually live here?)
• Southampton and Portsmouth (these were always the 'big' cities we visited in my childhood and my memories are not overwhelmingly positive but I may be missing out )

So AIBU to ask...

• Is there anywhere I have missed that is effectively an Edinburgh in the south
• Where would you live with our stipulations?
• Are we ridiculous to even consider leaving Edinburgh?

Thanks in advance!

Stay in Edinburgh and visit your family regularly

Southampton is not the Edinburgh of the south. Portsmouth is ok, Southsea potentially, but crowded, lots of traffic on and off the island.

I'd stick with Edinburgh!

Hove.

Although I'd cling onto Edinburgh if you can.

Southampton and Portsmouth are not remotely comparable to Edinburgh and I'd avoid at all costs!

If you're planning on children then you absolutely must future-proof the next 5-10 years so I would say you need a garden and three bedrooms, and a driveway or convenient parking. That might sway your area/budget.

Bournemouth has a certain buzz about it and maybe worth considering.

Smaller towns include Whitstable and Rye - both very pretty, both pretty, historical towns.

Canterbury is you want something slightly bigger, although not on the coast but within easy reach of the sea.

And I'd also plan for the future as not all working from home jobs will stay that way so realistically need to be commutable distance to London.

I think Richmond has been the best suggestion

@GetEmOutByFriday

Tbh, I think you'd be crazy to leave Edinburgh, it's a fantastic city with so much going in the way of facilities and activities. Maybe OTT when the festival is on, I've never been at that time.

Chichester is nice, but so much more limited. Pallant House, a tiny museum and the Festival Theatre. Once you've walked round the walls once on a rainy Sunday you might not want to do it again. The cinema is a McDonalds and the swimming pool long gone.

Plus points are that as asmall town everywhere is within walking distance, there's good sailing fairly near and stunning countryside. Chichester has a direct trainline to London which is convenient..

My father was born in Edinburgh and I've spent a lot of time in Chi. Does my bias show?

Most importantly for me though is the fact that Scotland looks after her citizens.

Good healthcare with free prescriptions. Free University education and currently renegotiating to be part of Erasmus again, despite Johnson throwing it out even when offered it when leaving the EU.

Longer term, there's the prospect of Independence and future EU membership.

All of which are well worth hanging onto, in my opinion.

I think it may be a long time since you've been to Chichester! It has had a big leisure centre with pools and other facilities for 30 years, and the cinema is a big multiscreen one. There's a big new museum too showing the roman remains below.

[quote Taoneusa]Naice!
www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/115658639#/?channel=RES_BUY[/quote]
We’re contemplating a move to Hove, and this is a great find. Don’t suppose you’re free to be my estate agent are you? I’ve got an 8-month old and zero time for house hunting!!

I used to live in Cambridge and whilst I loved it there and it's really beautiful (especially next to the millpond during the summer), it is quite soulless. I didn't find the tourists put me off, in fact I quite liked the buzz they gave the city. It's so easy to get to London too, but not near the coast which I really missed. You will also notice a big difference in the weather if you moved to Cambridge.

Tunbridge Wells? We are currently selling our 3 bed here for £600k …

Have you considered Bath/Bristol? Both gorgeous cities that I think you would enjoy ( I have lived in both Bristol and Edinburgh and they have a similar feel)

Either move really close to your family (within 20 minutes) or stay in Edinburgh.

You will only really benefit if your family are close enough to pop round, help with childcare etc. If you are a few hours drive, you will still be making special visits as your schedule will fill with activities and parties once the kids are a bit bigger.

Edinburgh now has a direct flight to Bournemouth, which is cheap and quick and could be easier than driving from somewhere a few hours away, especially as the roads near Southampton are a nightmare.

Both Winchester and Chichester are decent places to live, though your budget would go further in other parts of the country. As PP have said, Portsmouth is a shit hole.

How would your OH's parents take you moving so far away?

I'm in Bath.
Same walkability, same feel, river, canal, surrounded by countryside and it's really a lot of different villages that make a city. And good road & rail links to the south east. Has a nice relaxed feel.

Richmond is great. Close to London but has its own identity.
Have a look at Ham as well. It has a charming common, it boarders Richmond park and has easy access to Richmond on foot/bike along the river or by bus.

Bath to Bournemouth or east of there is a bitch of a drive. M4 then the tedious A34. No No
How about Milton Keynes, it is very spread out, good public transport and improving art gallery and theatre. Before Covid we saw ballet and went to a Turner exhibition.
Very nearly bought there. Stony Stratford part is older.

BIWI I have thought about this - we both love York, Harrogate, Knaresborough and Leeds... just seems a bit scary moving to somewhere where we know no one, but I definitely should consider...

AlexaIWillNeverSayDucking I have also thought about this. I know my parents will make the effort to be very involved in our lives wherever we are but I suppose I'm also missing siblings and friends.

Watchingyou2sleezes DH has a very different relationship with his family - they're all a bit more independent, he has a lot of siblings dotted all over and his parents travel a lot anyway. He has a lot of friends in the south and lived away from Edinburgh during uni and straight after. I'm the one who is more concerned about leaving Edinburgh! I worry that we couldn't have the same quality of life anywhere else... but also I do miss my family and friends so much. My parents are keen to help with childcare but to be honest I'd even love to just live somewhere where I could drive and meet them halfway for lunch!

SprayedWithDettol we do love Richmond. We know we'd be looking at flats there. I guess it's easy to be happy with a flat now (Edinburgh is all about flat living!) but difficult to predict how we'll feel with children. However, at the moment I'm definitely plumping towards flat in the right place rather than choosing where we live around where we can afford a house + garden. I may be misinformed though!

I'd give Brighton a big miss, Oxford too. I quite like Bristol and Southampton as we go to those for the theatre sometimes but not sure what it's like to live there. Bath is nice although we don't go as getting in and out and parking are a nightmare. Winchester is lovely, or my suggestion would be Newbury - only an hour and a half to London if you're missing the big city or less than an hour on the train.

@austenwildfell

Bath to Bournemouth or east of there is a bitch of a drive. M4 then the tedious A34. No No How about Milton Keynes, it is very spread out, good public transport and improving art gallery and theatre. Before Covid we saw ballet and went to a Turner exhibition. Very nearly bought there. Stony Stratford part is older.

Fair point! Hadn't thought about the post-M4 bit! Bit like visiting my Mum in coastal Dorset - only so many A roads & tractors you can do before losing the will to carry on

That's interesting Tal45 - I've always loved Oxford but I don't know it too well and have never strayed from the touristy bits...

@idontlikealdi

Southampton and Portsmouth are not remotely comparable to Edinburgh and I'd avoid at all costs!

I know... I think I'm trying to kid myself that there's a side to them that I've missed!