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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Wedding venue late license

47 replies

Philipsmummy1357 · 03/11/2021 20:39

Hi, hoping for some advice / opinions here. I am getting married in 10 days time, and when choosing a venue one of the most important things for myself and my partner was finding a venue that allowed for a late finish time - 2am.

We eventually found a venue that could accommodate this, and were assured when booking by the events management company linked to the venue that the 2am license wouldn’t be an issue as long as the council approved it (which they have). The venue is actually a functioning church (we are only having the reception there, our ceremony is taking place in our parish church), and they use it for events as a money making exercise I suppose.

We today received news that the priest of the reception venue church has now turned around and said that actually, as our wedding is on a Saturday he thinks it’s inappropriate for it to go until 2am as that will take it into Sunday (which is obviously a ‘holy’ day). The events company have been back and forth with him all day but he’s not budging.

We are obviously very upset about this - the entire schedule of the day is based around a 2am finish and we have spent a HUGE amount of money on this venue - which we wouldn’t have chosen were it not for the late license.

Am I being unreasonable to be considering legal action? We are essentially entirely at their mercy as this news has come too late for us to consider taking a refund and finding an alternative. For reference we have a signed contract which clearly states the finish time as 2am. Am I also being unreasonable to think that the opinion of the priest in this instance is sort of irrelevant - I understand and respect his views, but the fact remains that this venue was sold to us on the understanding that we could have it until 2am and we have a contract stating that.

OP posts:
mostlydrinkstea · 04/11/2021 08:54

I'm a bit surprised a church allowed a party to run to 2am. The first service of the day is likely to be 8am which doesn't leave much time for turnaround. However changing their minds at this late stage and saying no is unreasonable. If this is CofE or RC you could go to the archdeacon and ask for their support. They might be able to broker a conversation with the priest.

DedalusBloom · 04/11/2021 08:54

I'd be tempted to push through until 2am on the day and deal with it later on the basis of asking for forgiveness rather than permission -you've got the contract saying you can use the venue until then - is the priest nearby and will actually know on the day itself?

AtillatheHun · 04/11/2021 09:01

Also - have you checked your insurance?

AchyFlower · 04/11/2021 09:12

@Philipsmummy1357

1.30am last orders, 1.45am music off 2am departure x
Suggest a comprise of last orders at 12? So no alcohol served on the Sunday?
boringcreation · 04/11/2021 09:56

@Soupseason

Doesn't solve your problem but if it finishes at 12 your guests will be silently pleased. Noone likes hanging around for the last dying hours of q wedding reception. By 10 most will be thinking what time can I leave without looking rude
You've obviously never met an Irish person Grin
mamaoffourdc · 04/11/2021 10:05

Take legal action, we had this problem when we got married, our solicitor sent a letter outlining what costs they were liable for ie cancelling the venue due to contract changes and they very quickly changed their minds

UncomfortableBadger · 04/11/2021 14:06

Is the noise the main objection from the priest?

Our wedding venue was a listed building in a major city and the council had imposed quite firm restrictions about when any live music or DJ sets had to end. We got round this by doing a Silent Disco instead so that we could continue well into the early hours without upsetting anybody. It only cost us £200 to hire the whole set up and it was absolutely brilliant fun as we got to have four channels with different music on each - something for everybody Smile

Philipsmummy1357 · 05/11/2021 15:59

Thanks everyone. No resolution sadly - the priest honestly could not have cared less when we spoke to him about it :( v upsetting and frustrating tbh.

BUT due to it only being a week away we have no choice but to go with the new timings. Just trying to focus on the fact that we will still be married and celebrating with our close friends and family x

OP posts:
NorthSouthcatlady · 05/11/2021 16:26

@boringcreation well, exactly! I’ve been to a lot of irish wedding and no one likes an early finish

The priest sounds like a dick, so he feels super strong about this but won’t speak to you? Is it really coming from him? I would go down the legal route if you are getting 2 hours less than you paid for

WeeWelshWoman · 05/11/2021 16:29

Ask for a partial refund to reflect the late change in what is being offered.

Philipsmummy1357 · 05/11/2021 16:45

[quote NorthSouthcatlady]@boringcreation well, exactly! I’ve been to a lot of irish wedding and no one likes an early finish

The priest sounds like a dick, so he feels super strong about this but won’t speak to you? Is it really coming from him? I would go down the legal route if you are getting 2 hours less than you paid for[/quote]
We managed to speak to him in the end (by physically going to the church) - he honestly could not have cared less. He’s definitely in the wrong job

OP posts:
TractorAndHeadphones · 05/11/2021 17:00

Lawyer up and be prepared to see it through.
How very Christian of the priest…

TractorAndHeadphones · 05/11/2021 17:00

*good Christian
Sarcastic

RoseValleyRambles · 05/11/2021 18:06

Ask for an equivalent % refund...

Puzzledandpissedoff · 05/11/2021 19:07

Contract is issued by the events company on behalf of the venue - the company are the exclusive caterer / supplier for the venue if that makes sense

It makes perfect sense, but I didn't know churches were also cashing in with the "exclusive supplier" thing. If they want the income of a business I'd expect them to act like a business, but sadly the priest's attitude is no surprise and he seems to want the best of both worlds (though not necessarily the next one Wink)

I hope you still have a brilliant day though Flowers

AgentJohnson · 05/11/2021 19:35

The priest is under no obligation to talk to you, why should he? Your dispute is with the company you hired to sort this, it is their screw up. Make a formal complaint and negotiate compensation.

NorthSouthcatlady · 05/11/2021 20:13

@Philipsmummy1357 he does appear to be in the wrong job. Sounds like the priest who didn’t want hymns at my granddads funeral, we said we want hymns. He deliberately didn’t put the hymn numbers up, we sang extra loud, assisted by a tall ginger man with a booming singing voice. Who no one has seen before or since. So my dads religious sisters refused to pay him. This was pre-covid for clarity, 10+ years ago

Smilerjone · 05/11/2021 20:14

What’s he going to do at midnight? Start ringing the bells to get you out?Grin I would just stay until 2

RampantIvy · 05/11/2021 20:16

@AgentJohnson

The priest is under no obligation to talk to you, why should he? Your dispute is with the company you hired to sort this, it is their screw up. Make a formal complaint and negotiate compensation.
Agent is right. The company organising the event should have checked with the priest if they could have a late licence.
Noodleted · 05/11/2021 20:25

If your contract says 2am and was entered into the events company as agent for the church then it's binding on them. Your lawyer should be able to advise but you can claim specific performance of a contract, meaning they would have to comply with it. If they tried not to it would be contempt of court (and therefore a criminal offence). The other option would be to claim afterwards for damages, though I don't imagine they would be very much.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 05/11/2021 20:31

The company organising the event should have checked with the priest if they could have a late licence

But OP said the company are an exclusive supplier for the church; therefore they'd surely know perfectly well if 2am's acceptable or not
If so, then presumably they've either lied in order to get the booking, or the time's been okay'd before and the priest's changed his mind

Either way it's pretty shabby for none of them to be prepared to help the couple. As said, if they want to run this as a business - no doubt charging accordingly - then a certain standard's expected, and for me this wouldn't be it

TractorAndHeadphones · 05/11/2021 23:37

@Puzzledandpissedoff

The company organising the event should have checked with the priest if they could have a late licence

But OP said the company are an exclusive supplier for the church; therefore they'd surely know perfectly well if 2am's acceptable or not
If so, then presumably they've either lied in order to get the booking, or the time's been okay'd before and the priest's changed his mind

Either way it's pretty shabby for none of them to be prepared to help the couple. As said, if they want to run this as a business - no doubt charging accordingly - then a certain standard's expected, and for me this wouldn't be it

‘Helping’? They signed a contract! they don’t get to decide whether to honour it or not. It’s a legal document.

I’d ageee that legal action should be brought solely because money grabbing behaviour like this shouldn’t be excused - especially from a church. They should at least give OP a partial refund

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