..to struggle to comprehend huge salaries?

[missbunnyrabbit]

I was reading the thread about how much people earn having been to grammar/private schools and I just cannot get my head around how much lots of people earn. My head just cannot imagine such huge salaries. People earning over 100k, what on earth do they even do with that money? Do they buy everything gold-plated? That's a joke BUT I have no idea what anyone does with that sort of money or what it could be needed for. This isn't a bashing thread or anything like that. I'm just a bit stunned.

Does anyone else's brain struggle to imagine such huge amounts of money?

I don't resent anyone's success but there is a degree of blindness to societal inequality if we say anyone can do it. Yes, people from humble backgrounds can be high earners, but most aren't. Yes, people who grew up with more privileges can end up as low earners, but most don't.

The Global social mobility index has the UK in 21st place out of 82 countries in 2020.not bad on a global scale but not great. Then within the UK there is regional variation with some areas scoring zero for social mobility. Do people believe everyone in those areas are just not trying?

I'd have no trouble spending that salary. Mine would go on private education for grandchildren. I'd employ a cleaner. I'd save for retirement. I'd buy better quality clothes. I'd do the weekly shop in M&S. i'd have lovely holidays. I'd have choice and freedom. It must be lovely.

hollyhocksarenotmessy a lot of posters on here from high earning households including myself came from humble backgrounds.

@linabe I don't have a nanny, cleaner or any staff. I dont have a large house (tiny terrace actually but south and expensive). I have a 10 year old car. I dont have private school fees. None of that. But I am not in a couple where we both earn comparative. I do have alot in savings and pension and I do go on caravan/holiday park holidays more than once a year and get what shopping I want from the supermarket. I do have hotel stays etc. I worked out recently I spend as though my salary was 38k when I tot up what I have saved. So I am by no means suggesting that if you earn 100k you aren't well off. You bloody are. I just see rich as I've described above. But it is massively privileged - its choices that lead to people earning 100k having nothing left at the end of the month.

Tax takes lots of it, then I have pension and childcare costs, music lessons and other dc activities plus a cleaner.

I don't have a big house but it is paid off. I do have a nice car but it's older now and practical not flash. That's paid off too.

We don't go on flash holidays but I did try and go abroad 3x a year pre covid. Plus at least one UK break. We do nice weekend activities from time to time but I worry about frittered money as days out and nights out and trips away get so expensive.

I also fritter money on clothes but don't have anything designer. Just standard middle class hush and joules etc. It seems like the DC always need new clothes, practical things like football boots or new joggers etc. They don't dress well!

I save a decent amount but could do to invest. We aren't rich and live very similarly to our friends on smaller salaries. We do eat out and spend a lot on food.

Im generous when it comes to treating friends and family and I give to charity out of my pre tax salary. The kids get bought a lot at Christmas but not as much as some poorer families.

I don't understand how people live so well on so little. Lots of people do.

For the people insinuating that those of us who are on fairly average salaries should have "just worked harder/smarter/looked for opportunities" etc and we too could be earning 100k + (im not sure there are enough of these well paid jobs to go round but still....) ignore that a lot , not all, of high paying jobs are jointly achieved by good fortune, networking, or privilege as well as hard work.

Of course people have worked hard to get to those jobs and have niche or uber-desirable skills but on a different thread a high earning poster mentioned her company only recruited from Oxbridge or Ivy League universities. First hand I know someone (who works for an investment bank) who said that the only question they were asked at one interview was what school they went to. And you only have to look at what happens when the government hand out contracts that who you know is a major factor.

Age 34.

So you’re using a straw poll of one to understand how salary mobility works?

@Chippymunks

hollyhocksarenotmessy a lot of posters on here from high earning households including myself came from humble backgrounds.

Yes and proud of it. Nice to read a positive post on here.

Can I ask at what age people got to earning £100k per year?

25 for me. I graduated at 21, got my professional qualification in my first job and then moved into investment banking. However, my annual bonus was larger than my salary and, as such, not guaranteed.

My husband is the higher earner now as I took a career break when we had kids. In answer to the comments about it being obscene and how do we sleep at night, we don't feel guilty as it's the market rate for our occupations. That's not to say we don't have empathy for other occupations (nursing for example) where people work very hard for far less money.

Appreciate that educational achievement and other factors such as good health and childcare are a barrier, but we both targeted working in well-paid industries. In response to posters questioning about high earners' lifestyles and outgoings matching their salaries, yes it's clearly our choice. We could scale back and spend less. We're very aware that we're fortunate to be well off. But some of these posts have been quite unpleasant in response to a simple question asking what high earners spend their income on.

We are in this category thanks to DH salary of 150k

We are very aware of being in a position of privilege but don't feel "rich"

We don't outwardly live the high life. Our holidays are camping in our tent for two weeks and then we may get a week away in Greece but usually on EasyJet or a Tui last minute bargain deal and never to 5 star resorts ( or even 3 star come to that!)

In normal times we will have the occasional City break and we have been known to splurge on a more expensive holiday for a special birthday or anniversary but that would be saved for and quite unusual for us.

I don't buy expensive clothes ( I'm all Next and Sainsbury's ) and I don't have beauty treatments, just a cut and colour every other month.

We live in a nice semi detached house in a fairly expensive part of Essex. Mortgage paid off because we are in our 50's and bought 25 years ago when things were still affordable.

After the general household bills and on going house maintenance our kids seem to be our biggest cost. Just totted up in my head and we spend about £500p/m just on tutoring and private counselling for two DC.

Have just had to transfer my DD to private school due to bullying issues which were destroying her mental health so that's £15k a year.

That's where I feel the privilege the most. When we have a problem we can throw money at it.

The pandemic has highlighted this to us.

DD's eye surgery was cancelled and postponed indefinitely by the NHS so we went private.

Her orthodontic work was postponed by three years so we paid for it instead.

DS slipping behind with his GCSE study because of the lockdowns so we got tutoring organised.

I grew up on the breadline , as did DH so we have always saved for rainy days and we like many other families have had a lot of rainy days over the past 18 months. Makes us even more aware that others going through similar don't have the options we do.

Our household income is about £100k.

We give 8% of our take home pay to charity.
Then mortgage takes a big chunk, and our council tax is very high (our council is in the top 10 highest council tax areas)

We eat nice food and go on nice holidays- because those are our priorities. We drove very old cars and have old phones because we don't care about those things!

It's taken a long time to get to this salary level. When we first married we lived off significantly lower than the average income, and cut our cloth accordingly.

@Fizbosshoes

For the people insinuating that those of us who are on fairly average salaries should have "just worked harder/smarter/looked for opportunities" etc and we too could be earning 100k + (im not sure there are enough of these well paid jobs to go round but still....) ignore that a lot , not all, of high paying jobs are jointly achieved by good fortune, networking, or privilege as well as hard work.

Of course people have worked hard to get to those jobs and have niche or uber-desirable skills but on a different thread a high earning poster mentioned her company only recruited from Oxbridge or Ivy League universities. First hand I know someone (who works for an investment bank) who said that the only question they were asked at one interview was what school they went to. And you only have to look at what happens when the government hand out contracts that who you know is a major factor.

I dont disagree. In my profession my university helped a lot I feel. I am standard state school and got the grades (lower offer due to them lowering for access to education purposes) plus got the required 2:1. Not everyone from my school would've gotten into a similar uni. I also think luck played a big part too. I worked incredibly hard but I personally know people who never made it past the studying for my profession despite the same grades. I could easily have never made it in. Once in, its easier as you're then there. But to progress it makes a difference if you are able to network and I struggle with the confidence for that. I can see quite easily how people who have been privately educated and have connections, though no doubt also working hard, would've found it much easier to navigate their way into the profession and then once in navigate through to success. I know contemporaries who are lazier in relative terms and who dont go above and beyond but seem to do very well anyway as they seem to just know how it all works better than I do whereas I'm a fish out of water as I always feel like I dont belong and am just grateful to be in the room in the first place

@hollyhocksarenotmessy

I don't resent anyone's success but there is a degree of blindness to societal inequality if we say anyone can do it. Yes, people from humble backgrounds can be high earners, but most aren't. Yes, people who grew up with more privileges can end up as low earners, but most don't.

The Global social mobility index has the UK in 21st place out of 82 countries in 2020.not bad on a global scale but not great. Then within the UK there is regional variation with some areas scoring zero for social mobility. Do people believe everyone in those areas are just not trying?

Social mobility isn’t the number of people becoming high earners though. It’s the number who can afford to earn a decent living from humble backgrounds. Even people with all the advantages can’t all become high earners. Many aren’t suited to high earning professions. Or opening their own business.

The majority of people though barring adverse circumstances can probably over a decade or so earn an average salary. Now what average is depends on the area but something like 30K.

Now the fact that things are so expensive even an average salary may be right is a different discussion.

*tight

My DH transferred £690 to his sister in Israel on an internship who had a problem with weswap. She transferred the money to be converted to shekel and die to website issues, the money has left her bank account but is yet to be converted. So we are transferring the money to another sister (who does have a Israeli bank account) using revolut and that sister will withdraw the money and give it to the sister who needs the money. She may repay us the money (she says she would) but my DH would have transferred the money regardless and he doesn't care if she repays the money.

On the phone, DH was saying that £600 would barely last us a week in israel (which is more expensive than London) and she was aghast saying it would last her forever?! I guess if you have little, you also have different expectations until other people bail you out. They are lucky to be in the position to bail you out but DH and I are very conscious that when we lack money, no one will bail us out so we are focused on earning more.

This thread displays someone of this country’s worst traits; In other countries success is applauded and admired but we have this very unpleasant trait in the U.K. ( and I think it does apply in all the nations ) of wanting to pull people down . Obviously if someone earns well they are ‘lazy’, ‘tax dodging’, ‘ nasty’ in one post even ‘disgusting’ . If we are going to level out our society then we need to get over this , we need to have a society where aspirations are encouraged rather than sneered at . We need to get rid of the politics of envy,

It is no more true that all people who earn good salaries are exploiting the poor than it is that all people in lower paid professions have made bad choices . Why do we feel the need in this country to denigrate others and make sure they ‘don’t get above their station’. We need high earners in this country working for profitable businesses to pay the taxes we need , we also need everyone especially in the public services to earn a decent wage so that we get well trained people providing a quality service who are able to have a good standard if living . In short we need to work together we won’t get there by acting as if everyone who earns a decent salary should feel ashamed and everyone on a low income is a lazy scrounger. We need to let go of these damaging stereotypes.

In countries with good social mobility and a flatter social structure everyone pays more in than we do , and that includes the lower paid , and everyone takes out including the higher paid by using public services. By having this structure you create a ‘social contract’.

@Peaseblossum22

This thread displays someone of this country’s worst traits; In other countries success is applauded and admired but we have this very unpleasant trait in the U.K. ( and I think it does apply in all the nations ) of wanting to pull people down . Obviously if someone earns well they are ‘lazy’, ‘tax dodging’, ‘ nasty’ in one post even ‘disgusting’ . If we are going to level out our society then we need to get over this , we need to have a society where aspirations are encouraged rather than sneered at . We need to get rid of the politics of envy,

It is no more true that all people who earn good salaries are exploiting the poor than it is that all people in lower paid professions have made bad choices . Why do we feel the need in this country to denigrate others and make sure they ‘don’t get above their station’. We need high earners in this country working for profitable businesses to pay the taxes we need , we also need everyone especially in the public services to earn a decent wage so that we get well trained people providing a quality service who are able to have a good standard if living . In short we need to work together we won’t get there by acting as if everyone who earns a decent salary should feel ashamed and everyone on a low income is a lazy scrounger. We need to let go of these damaging stereotypes.

In countries with good social mobility and a flatter social structure everyone pays more in than we do , and that includes the lower paid , and everyone takes out including the higher paid by using public services. By having this structure you create a ‘social contract’.

I agree these attitudes hamper social mobility. I also think they can prevent people from mixing/engaging with others not like them as there are stereotypical ideas that perpetuate about how people will be/receive you. But actually communicating with eachother helps to learn from eachother and in doing so help mobility too

Come on all you lazy, workshy, scrounging poor people, you too can earn 100k if you just try, you just don’t want to.

TBH though I think this poster has a point - I have a 1st in maths from a good uni, and I COULD have chosen to go into investment banking like some of my friends did, and be on 6 figures by my age. However I didn't because I don't want to work 70 hours a week and miss out on my 20s. I like being able to relax in the evening, do various hobbies at a college and not think about work after I shut my laptop, therefore I chose a field with good work-life balance and lower salaries. The 2 friends I know with 6 figure jobs in investment banking rarely make it to social events because they are either working or tired from working. That's not a sacrifice I am willing (or able) to make, I'd have a mental breakdown after 2 weeks of working that much. You have lots of money but pay in other ways.

We have a large income and no mortgage.
We having nothing on finance and no credit cards.

No private education as I don’t agree with it. One car.
No cleaner (as I don’t agree with that either) or gardener.
No 2nd home (don’t agree with that either!)
A lovely but not massive house, it’s a listed individual property.
No fancy holidays, we like hiking.

We buy nice things, clothes and furniture etc and have great bathrooms, kitchen etc. Go out for nice meals and drink fine wines. We have huge pensions and a lot of money in savings.

@vickyp0llard

Come on all you lazy, workshy, scrounging poor people, you too can earn 100k if you just try, you just don’t want to.

TBH though I think this poster has a point - I have a 1st in maths from a good uni, and I COULD have chosen to go into investment banking like some of my friends did, and be on 6 figures by my age. However I didn't because I don't want to work 70 hours a week and miss out on my 20s. I like being able to relax in the evening, do various hobbies at a college and not think about work after I shut my laptop, therefore I chose a field with good work-life balance and lower salaries. The 2 friends I know with 6 figure jobs in investment banking rarely make it to social events because they are either working or tired from working. That's not a sacrifice I am willing (or able) to make, I'd have a mental breakdown after 2 weeks of working that much. You have lots of money but pay in other ways.

True, but one of my friends in investment banking basically ‘retired’ at 30! Now works for low pay for a charity close to his heart, but owns his house outright and has enough put away to see him through alongside his low salaried role.

Our household income is 70-75k, so not 100k, but appears to be pretty good looking at the stats. If you told me what we would earn now five years ago we would have imagined exotic holidays, owning our own home etc as we didn't earn much at all. We get neither as we are paying childcare fees for youngest and wrap around care for other child. Our rent is 1k for a flat. Which would get us a three bed detached house with a double garage elsewhere!

We aren't in debt but I do try to buy second hand too to reduce costs and am able to save a few hundred a month. Our cars are OLD, but we run two of them. If we earned 100k we might be better off, but probably not due to higher rate tax. It really does depend on where you live and what your circumstance are. I live in an expensive area and people just seem to get into serious debt, or parents who have done well out of their house prices rocketing have helped out. Having been dirt poor in the past, I really feel for people at the moment having to deal with rocketing inflation on a low income. They are being seriously let down.

I do know a very wealthy family and they basically spend because they can. They buy new cars (SUV's) every couple of years and holiday abroad three times a year, have kids in private school. Another wealthy family is constantly renovating their home and buying gadgets. You would think they hated having money as they seem determined to get rid of it on stuff they don't need all of the time. As pp's have said, school fees are a lot of money and something we could only afford on a 100k salary if we already had a mortgage and paid quite a bit off already. Having gone to two shitty, underperforming schools and still got a 1st class degree, I probably wouldn't bother with private education anyway, but each to their own.

There are also people in Mumsnet who mysteriously earn 200k a year while spending the entire week posting on here and will leap all over threads like this to talk about their salary. There are quite a few high earners who are genuine on here though and give great advice.

Then there's the fact that if you're earning 100k and either you or your partner has a gambling problem that is out of hand you are pretty screwed and I know of a couple of people like this too.

The 2 friends I know with 6 figure jobs in investment banking rarely make it to social events because they are either working or tired from working

This is spot on. You are handsomely paid but they "own" you. You're the friend that constantly cancels nights out because you're stuck at work or cancels weekends away at the last minute. When I was heavily pregnant, I went into work at 7am on the Thursday and got home at 7pm on the Friday, having had no sleep and worked through the night. It was brutal.

Out of the 100 fee earners in our department, there were 3 women (of which I was one). They were desperate to level that up but not many women wanted to work the silly hours - not that they were lazy or workshy, but that they didn't think the rewards were worth the sacrifice.

I'm also aware that other occupations work crazy hours without the fat salary.

@thecurliestwurly - I am on holiday this week and still checking work emails.
I'll often have a quick MNet scroll first thing and last thing or for 10 minutes during the day between zooms. I'm usually at my desk by 8.30 and finish work at about 7.30, often working 5/6 hours at weekends. Whilst I shouldn't have to justify that, you made me feel I do.

One thing our DC have is choice. DS wants an academic career (coming to the end of PhD); DD wants to teach. They will never have to worry about having a nice house and paying school feels (providing neither goes mad and has oodles of children).

True, but one of my friends in investment banking basically ‘retired’ at 30!

Sounds great, but it takes a certain type of character/determintation to be able to work 80 hour weeks for years with a long-term goal in mind. I simply wouldn't be able to do it, especially in a job I didn't think was "meaningful" - I resent having to do any overtime as it is. Someone upthread mentioned having to log in on their honeymoon - that's a nope from me.

Also, income doesn't necessarily relate to good financial habits. I've always been frugal and got a kick out of saving, we saved a 20% house deposit in 5 years. I have a friend who earns much more than me as a recruiter, but lives at home and has no money because he'll spend £100s on really posh meals/drinks and holidays without even blinking.