To want to restrict how much we have the heating on

[reallyagain]

After a winter working from home last year we were hit with a horrendous heating bill (several thousand on top of already paying quite a high amount per month). So this year with gas prices being so high I’m really conscious of being careful. DH wants it on much more than I do and it’s causing endless rows. He’s turned it on 4 separate times today and is sulking when I comment. We share heating bills - I suggested he pays more to have it on more but he refuses.

How much do you have the heating on if you work from home?

1. Only heat the room you are actually spending time in, not rooms you just pop into here and there (eg only heat the kitchen when you are in there cooking);
2. Layers, woolies, slippers;
3. Hot water bottle and a blanket over your/his lap plus one around your/his back;
4. Electric plus in radiator next to you/him in the room you are spending most time in;
5. Bed socks worn inside the slippers;
6. Have the main heating on for half an hour in the morning and evening just to take the chill off, to a high temperature if he wants, but only for half an hour.

That heating bill is insane, and that level of energy use is dreadful from an environmental perspective. Good luck!

We haven't switched it on yet this year tbh. We rarely do and use hot water bottled and dressing gowns. Both WFH. We're well paid but I just resent paying for it tbh. We usually use the heating around 5 days a year unless the weather turns snowy.

£660???

You need to call your gas supplier because even if you ran it every day that's insane

I live in Central Australia and we have long hot summers and freezing winter nights. My partner hates to use the aircon or heaters but I love having that luxury ... so I pay all of the power bills so that he can't complain. I think that's only fair too since if it were just him the bills would be much much smaller. If your husband wants to use the heating more he should be the one to foot the bill IMO. I would never expect for my partner to pay large amounts of money for something he didn't want to use

@ElvinBoys

How strange suggesting that he pays more if he wants the heating on. I don’t understand couples that live like flat mates sharing bills etc. Surely a marriage is about teamwork so everything gets shared. However that aside there’s no chance I would layer up, I much prefer to be comfortable in my home wearing what I like with the heating setting at a constant temperature.

Well someone has to pay more! The extra money

I couldn’t deal with this bit; in his words he shouldn't have to behave like 'a miserly arsehole' what part of expecting his partner who is putting in 10,000x the effort he is into keeping bills moderate to just pay up for all the heating he wants and he not pay any extra is not being a miserly arsehole??
I’d be canceling takeaways and his favorite foods in prep to pay for his heating bill. And every single conversation I’d point out he’s making a choice,‘it’s just his choice is to leave you stressed about money with him making no effort to help sort the differences. He’s not a victim here.

so this individual has a LOT of redeeming features does he? What a selfish so and so...I have no rads in my loft space (study and bedroom) i put electric blow heater to heat up and use hot water bottle for feet. Presumably he doesnt realise that gas prices are going up? Maybe he doesnt realise whole island nations are disappearing beneath the waves of rising sea levels. Had you thought of binning this utterkly selfish oaf?

If he’s refusing to pay extra then stick to your guns. He either pays extra or he layers up. I do agree a small heater for the room he works in will at least minimise the damage on the heating though. What’s so hard about having to put an extra layer on? I’m an extra layers person my heating doesn’t go above 18 ever and so far this year I’ve only used it twice to test it not actually to use it (I test it every few months to prevent being stuck with a broken boiler come winter). I think your DH is acting like a child.

Granda1

A system like that wouldn't work for me.

I have a new central heating system with a fancy controller, but prefer to manually control my heating.
My days are varied. I don't know from one day to the next what my heating requirements will be. I work from home, and dovetail my working with housework.
One day may be spent sitting doing admin, the next I may spend a few hours changing sheets or mopping floors. I often go out shopping/post office/pick up supplies. My heating system doesn't know whether I need my home at 16 or 21 degrees.
I may come back from a morning gym session hot and sweaty.
My needs for heating vary wildly and are unpredictable.
I don.t heat unused rooms, but far prefer to switch on the heating for 30 minutes for a boost, or two hours if I plan to have quiet down time.
I also have a distrust of any system trying to be too clever- always things that will go wrong!

I said the other day to my OH “is there a couple anywhere in the world where one isn’t hot and one cold?” 😂 I think as part of our subconscious mating ritual we match with opposites when it comes to feeling the cold !!

Buy an electric heater for thirty quid. They are very efficient

Suppose the system had learned the characteristics of a room and “knew” it had to start heating the radiator(s) at 7:30a.m. to achieve the chosen room temperature of 19C at the chosen time of 8a.m.
Then an additional heat source is introduced.
On the first day it would “get it wrong” and the desired temperature would be reached prematurely. The next day the system would not start heating the radiators until, perhaps 7:45a.m. If the additional heat source was permanent it would relearn how long before the scheduled “on” time to start the radiators. Of course, if the fire delivered sufficient heat by itself, the radiators would not come on at all. We have a fire in our lounge and the system copes just fine - although it cannot, of course, do anything about the fire heating the room beyond the set temperature - the system simply tries to maintain the room temperature at the programmed value and if the temperature goes above the programmed temperature (eg additional heater, sunny day etc) it can do nothing to actively reduce it. You need full air-con for that.

Tell him to put extra clothes on first before hitting the heating.
But also look at who your supplier is and change if you you can find it cheaper elsewhere.
I am trying to get my son, to turn lights off when he leaves a room. As he has a habit of putting on more lights than necessary. Then leaves them on.

@Granda1 - we have one of these systems but….. Dh and I are clutching our phones glaring at each other as we try to trump the other’s settings. At least three times yesterday was the cry, “Who has been on the Hive?!” I was suddenly boiling yesterday evening and I knew Dh had sneaked onto his phone and upped the heating.

Such a system relies on everyone having the same internal thermostat and, as @Spaceshiphaslanded observed, it is a rare couple who is thoroughly compatible heat-wise!

@Courtier

We haven't switched it on yet this year tbh. We rarely do and use hot water bottled and dressing gowns. Both WFH. We're well paid but I just resent paying for it tbh. We usually use the heating around 5 days a year unless the weather turns snowy.

Bloody hell. The way my (well paid) parents rationed the heating to 17 degrees and I had to sit in my room in a hat - I thought heating must cost a grand a month or something. Then when I started renting I realised it was only about the price of a meal/drinks out a month. I'd rather miss a meal out than have a cold house. If it's under about 21 then I have freezing hands which makes it impossible to concentrate on anything other than your freezing hands. I'm thin with poor circulation though, I wear woolly socks in the house all year round.

@reallyagain

Vivienne do you mind me asking how much you spend on gas/electric per month? Last winter we were averaging £660pm. Can't really cut back elsewhere to pay for that! It's a 3 bed house albeit Victorian

I've only begun to read the thread but this stopped me in my tracks! Wow! I have a 3 bed Victorian house and have myself dh and 2dc...our combined gas and electric is £110 per calendar month with a smart meter. During the summer it was only £79 Tell him to wear appropriate clothes and use electric heaters. We need to be even more aware now. If this has already been said sorry, I am reading the thread now

Just read the thread and see you've changed to Octopus. That's who I'm with, make sure you do send the regular updates or your bill will make huge leaps (I forgot one month and my bill doubled). Stick to your guns, try the suggestions and he needs to get a grip and stop burying his head. He's lucky you're so on top

over £600 per month!🤤

I've just bought a heated throw (argos). It's very cheap to run and you can set temperature and time easily.

Thing about threads like this is that they become a race to the bottom. I wear 4 layers, go to bed at 1800, lots of socks etc and RARELY put the heating on. What a miserable existence this must be. I did have a relative who told us all to layer up when we visited and he wasnt joking. The house was musty, damp and rarely had the heating on. He seemed very proud of what he was doing until an outspoken relation told him to stop being so stingy and that if he didnt change his ways no one would visit because it was such an unpleasant experience.

Our electrician used to keep an eye on an old chap who lived in a big house on his own and was one of his neighbours. This guy used to have the coldest house ever, and used to change light bulbs when he travelled from room to room. He was also someone who went to bed very early to keep warm. I think there are a number of people like this especially the elderly (not my Mum - her house is like Barbados!) who remember the old days and refuse to make their lives more comfortable. They have money but choose not to spend it.

I was on another thread a few months ago about Power of Attorney, wills etc and a sizeable % of people came on to say they were staggered by what their elderly relatives had in bank accounts once they became POA.

I can see where you're both coming from to be honest, but that bill - YIKES!

I heat whatever room my parrots are in, they have no choice but to be here with me and come from sunnier climes so spend daytime in the conservatory which is 'their' playroom. In the evenings we room together, in a better insulated part of the house, and overnight they have a heat mat at the moment, but as it gets colder I'll move their cage into the other room and they'll have a heater on overnight.

I dress warm, and still feel the cold, and find it miserable. I love the thought of being able to come in to a warm house. I hate the Winter when I'm at my desk and freezing, wrapping blankets round my legs and even occasionally 'splurging' with a heater and closed door. My Mum andbrother are always telling me to put the heating on, but I cannot afford to, so I manage without it until I really can't. Because of this, I'm currently rearranging my house so that when the cold really hits, the parrots and I can be in the better insulated room together as soon as darkness hits. I'll probably be in there without heat in daylight hours as it's warmer than my current 'office', but as usual the parrots will have heating. It's cheaper than a vet bill.

When I moved here I foolishly (or so it seemed at the time) got talked into an electric boiler, and having done one Winter in the same way as described above, I tried another leaving the heating on a timer and loved having a warm house, was still careful re closing doors and containing it etc. My quarterly bill at that point was circa £650 - not affordable for me. I have not used the boiler since. I have solar panels for hot water and an immersion heater that I put on when I need hot or additional hot water. If I had some solar panels for electricity I would definitely have the heating on right around the house, but that is a luxury that I cannot afford.

I also have a window open at night, pretty much all year round, otherwise I feel dreadful and have a very pudgy face upon waking. I'm snug under my duvet.

I think the issue for you is the temperature he wants to be in. I have a thermometer that shows the temperature and suitable ranges, i.e. Cool - Good room temperature and Warm - turn down heating. Maybe if you could get something like that, he'd realise that he's the one that needs to adapt.

I have friends who have an annual argument re the heating, and rarely argue other than that. Just a reminder that we are all different.

I was on another thread a few months ago about Power of Attorney, wills etc and a sizeable % of people came on to say they were staggered by what their elderly relatives had in bank accounts once they became POA.

Financial planning would be so much easier if we knew the date we would die.

I was on another thread a few months ago about Power of Attorney, wills etc and a sizeable % of people came on to say they were staggered by what their elderly relatives had in bank accounts once they became POA

It's true. My mil lives like a pauper...she has hundreds of thousands in the bank and owns her house outright

If you say they’ve checked the meter and boiler and all is as it should be, all I can think is that you’ve got a or multiple faulty appliances. When an appliance is faulty it can drain electric quite badly, might be worth buying a plug that tells you on the front how much an appliance is using, they’re only around £15-20 and then go round and test all your appliances to see if anything is using an excessive amount.

Use Electric over-blankets over you at your desk/sofa, which are very cheap. Install door closers everywhere. Get full automation so eg. you only heat bedrooms just before you need them (setting time you want room to reach required temperature).
The chinese approach is to heat the person / area the person is in, and not the whole room.

I hate the cold, and could happily have heating set to 30 degrees. But...our house could also cost £600-700pcm to heat. Easily. Old house, slightly ramshackle. Most expensive gas in the British Isles...

We have tado on every radiator plus a tado thermostat. Run the house at 15 degrees and unused rooms closed off with no heating, turn up the lounge to 18 in the evening. We use warm clothes, heated throw on the sofa. We have battery powered heated gilets and coats to wear in the house and the dogs have warm fleece jumpers and the pets have heat pads in their beds plus electric blankets on all our beds turned on all day so there's always a warm place for humans and animals to be.

I really feel for the OP. All the people questioning the bill...its easy to run up a crazy bill if the heating use is also crazy in an old house. It's like trying to heat the sky.