Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

New job sick child Ainu to ask to work from home?

29 replies

Woesisme · 01/11/2021 05:27

I’ve started a new great job. My manager has been really flexible so far and seems nice enough. The last person who did my job ended up working from home, but obviously she knew everything she was doing.

Anyway I’m a single mum and I really really need this job, my little boy has conjunctivitis, he has a really bad cold and is just miserable. He can’t go to nursery until his eye clears up. I have someone to help look after himfor everyday except Wednesday. Do you think it’s cheeky to ask if I could do some work from home that day? It’s just me in the office, the boss has left me several times alone whilst he goes out for meetings. My third day at work he left me alone so not as if he doesn’t trust me.
I’m just worried it will reflect badly already

OP posts:
lnsufficientFuns · 01/11/2021 05:30

Only ask if you would otherwise have to call in sick

Try everything else first

Good luck

thegameisafoot · 01/11/2021 05:30

Are you actually going to be able to work?

I'd let you have the day as annual leave, but I might not let you work from home that day. It would be different if your child was a teen and you just needed to be an adult in the building in case there was a fire or something, but a nursery age child is likely to need more interaction, making working difficult.

Working from home isn't childcare. It's working from a different location.

Original poster
Woesisme · 01/11/2021 05:32

I’m just hoping for the best in terms of being able to work, I know it’s not childcare but I don’t want to let him down before I’ve even settled in. I’ve pretty much exhausted all other help for the rest of the week

OP posts:
Metabigot · 01/11/2021 05:36

I'd avoid this so early on in your employment . I'd ask for annual leave or worst case scenario take emergency dependent leave saying childcare arrangements have fallen through for that day but it wont be a regular occurrence etc.

SinoohXaenaHide · 01/11/2021 05:45

I think it would be a very bad idea to suggest working from home in this circumstance. As a new starter they don't know you well yet and the decisions you make are contributing to them building up an understanding of how you work. Blurring the boundary between WFH and doing childcare would be a huge red flag for many employers. If you are doing childcare you aren't working.

If every possible other avenue for childcare is exhausted then you need to ask for emergency leave - either unpaid leave or annual leave. You can offer that you might be able to get a bit of work done from home while DC is parked in front of the TV but you need to make it clear that you realise you can't possibly achieve the output of a full day in the office at the same time as looking after a poorly child. If you ask them to categorise the day as WFH rather than Leave of whatever type, that will cast doubt on how effective you will be when WFH on all future occasions.

Original poster
Woesisme · 01/11/2021 05:45

I don’t even know if he would let me take holiday but I suppose I could ask. I’ve asked everyone I know and they all can’t help. I don’t really know what else I’m supposed to do

OP posts:
Doodlepip23 · 01/11/2021 05:54

I suggest asking for emergency time off for dependent… you can’t find anyone else to help today, so there’s not much else you can do. Hope your boy feels better soon.

drpet49 · 01/11/2021 06:01

You won’t be working though will you. You’ll be looking after your nursery aged son.

Take annual leave.

Zarene · 01/11/2021 06:03

You need to ask for the day as holiday.

'Working' from home, but actually doing sod all, will look much worse than just having a day off.

Blankiefan · 01/11/2021 06:05

I'd ask for the day off and stress that I'd expect it to be unpaid.

MatildaIThink · 01/11/2021 06:07

If you can actually work then yes, otherwise it is unreasonable to ask to "work from home", but then not actually work. Talk to your boss, also mention holiday, they may be flexible, they might not. Taking a day off for childcare so long as it is reasonable (eg. not the day of a big client meeting) is usually fine, claiming to be working from home but hot working is looked on very dimly.

fanontonight · 01/11/2021 06:07

Have nursery said he cannot return until eyes are clear. I've worked in childcare for 14 years and everywhere I've worked the policy is if they are okay in themselves (which be may be feeling better by Wednesday) although contagious they can attend. The staff should bather them regularly throughout the day to keep them clean xx

Cattitudes · 01/11/2021 06:22

The government guidelines are that he can attend nursery so I would be challenging them on why their policies are against public health England. Especially if you can get cover for him on the other days. He might be feeling better by Wednesday. You could ask for unpaid leave but I would probably try to save it for chickenpox/ covid when they can't attend.

SeaHollyDaiz · 01/11/2021 06:26

I've put yabu because you need to ask for a carers day. If your child is ill enough that they can't attend nursery, then you are going to need to give them a lot of attention, and how will you get work done at the same time? That's what I'd suggest to my team members anyway.

Original poster
Woesisme · 01/11/2021 06:27

I think it’s a combination of his cough and eyes. I will ask the manager again but when I text her she said no. She also said if he has runny nappies he can’t come

OP posts:
Clymene · 01/11/2021 06:30

Well hopefully he'll be better by Wednesday but agree with everyone else, you're going to have to ask for emergency leave. If it's a small company, I'd offer to take it unpaid as you're so early in the job.

user159 · 01/11/2021 06:40

I would be honest and expect the day unpaid - shows you're a trustworthy employee and human!

I was once told if my child was sick it would be better to call in sick myself (especially if it was just a day and no other/regular sick leave) and that was by someone in HR! Whilst easier in terms of pay, if you're past your probation, it just doesn't sit right with me to lie but I appreciate an unpaid day could be a very big problem.

Savoretti · 01/11/2021 06:47

How do you know he will be off all week? That seems very unlikely. Children bounce back very quickly

Original poster
Woesisme · 01/11/2021 06:48

He may not be off all week but I’ve made plans just in case he can’t come back in. Nursery have said three days with his eye, hopefully his cold has gone but any bad nappies he can’t come back in until 48 hours until the last one

Thank you everyone for the advice, it’s so hard with young kids.

OP posts:
marykitty · 01/11/2021 06:54

I work in my position since many years and my boss trust me 100% also because I would never claim to WFH if I am actually taking care of my son.
I know it's a pain but you have to take a day off.

InTheLabyrinth · 01/11/2021 06:54

You wont get much done with a preschool aged ill child to look after.
Sorry. You need some form of leave - holiday, dependants leave (if you get it when it's a known event), or unpaid.
Hope he's feeling better soon.

Wheelz46 · 01/11/2021 07:13

If you are set up to WFH, I don't see any reason why you cannot suggest this to your manager. People were working from home with their children when we were in lockdown, if its good for then, why wouldn't it be good for now?

The company I work for offer hybrid working, this includes new starters, they only ask that training is in the office.

If you are not comfortable asking, maybe mention to your manager, your options, holiday, emergency child care leave or WFH then the ball is in their court.

Dontforgetyourbrolly · 01/11/2021 07:16

I have every sympathy for you as I am a single mum myself but realistically how much work will you manage with a sick nursery aged child ?
You need to book leave for this I'm afraid.

Bingbong21 · 01/11/2021 07:26

Could you work extended days the other days and then just do a couple of hours on weds?

Capricornandproud · 01/11/2021 07:30

Oh love. Just hopping on to say being a single mum and holding down your job is bloody tough. All they want is you when they’re not well and I really feel for you. Xx