Mental health and husband

[drainedenergy]

AIBU to share my mental health issues with DH?

I've had an anxiety attack all week culminating in an awful day yesterday. Waking at 2am every day for the day with pumping Adrenalin and a sick toddler to look after.

I shared today that I'm struggling and I've been told to get a grip, he didn't sign up for this and that my issues inconvenience lots of people.

I was diagnosed with PND 6 years ago and nobody noticed. It was awful. I've been battling for 6 years and now pretty much over it but occasionally have my wobbles.

Should I be sharing these things with DH or do you just suffer in silence or share with friends?

What would you do if it were the other way round and he was unwell? I am willing to bet that you would listen and be sympathetic and do all you can to help. That is your answer!

I am very sorry that you are struggling at the moment and hope that you will be able to get the help you need.

Of course you can share.
But he can’t solve your issues OP. What RL professional help are you having?
Anxiety is awful.

You should be able to tell your husband anything. I’m sorry that’s the response you got.

What other support do you have?

If you were diagnosed 6 years ago, what has happened in that intervening period?

By that I mean, what help did you get? Medication? Therapy? What (if any) advice were you given to help you manage/ control / help lift / work through the PND?

What he said sounds brutal and harsh but without the wider context it’s hard to know whether he’s being absolutely awful. Or whether he too is running on empty trying to support you. 6 years is a long time to be struggling with this. And a long time to live with someone struggling with this.

In an ideal world of course you should be able to share this with him. I’m just wondering has her himself got anything left to give? If he’s been supporting you.

If there’s been no support and this is consistently how he’s been, that’s a different ball game and it’s not very kind.

You should definitely not suffer in silence.

You can tell him that YOU "did not sign up for this" either, and that you're in it together and you need help and how can he help support you?

Sounds like he is contributing to your anxiety a great deal.

Christ on a bike. What an unsupportive git. Turns it round on him when you're struggling and need support. Your DH is supposed to be on your side, looking after you. Not telling you that you're an inconvenience.

He sounds bloody awful, you poor thing. Anxiety is hard enough, especially terrifying physical symptoms, without being dismissed and made to feel like a burden.

You should be able to ask your DH for support whenever you want, and receive it. He should be asking how he can help, whether you need anything etc. :(

And you absolutely shouldn't suffer in silence - don't listen to him. I talk very openly to my friends about my mental health, as do they to me. Speak to someone you trust and tell them you're struggling, and ask them for the support you need - whether it's a coffee or a phone call or a walk or just to listen while you get it all out. No friend (or husband) should begrudge that and I am so angry that he's made you feel like you shouldn't talk about it.