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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WIBU to lob garlic at fuckwit exH's head?

17 replies

BlowDryRat · 31/10/2021 18:21

My DC have been looking forward to Halloween and trick or treating for months. ExH has them EoW when he can be bothered and it was his turn this weekend. He promised them that they would be back home early (5-6) so that they could go out T/T with their friends. 6pm has come and gone and he's just text to say that they're 'stuck on the motorway'. Asked where and they're still over 100 miles/2 hours away Angry He always wrecks things like this. He did it to me when we were married and he does it to the kids now: gets them excited about something special and then 'runs late'.

I've dressed up as a vampire and have a string of garlic. WIBU to use them as missiles when the absolute bastard finally turns up?

OP posts:
Snog · 31/10/2021 18:23

Turn him into a toad

JustLyra · 31/10/2021 18:23

If he's 100% caused it by selfishness or stupidity then YANBU to do it.

However, there has been absolute train chaos today and it took my DH twice as long as usual to drive home from the South East as the roads are way, way busier so it might not be entirely his fault.

frazzledasarock · 31/10/2021 18:24

Tell the kids oh dear daddy didn’t plan that well, he’s so late all the houses are out of sweets now.
No way would I take the blame for this one

Do you have some sweets left for your kids?

Your kids will eventually vote with their feet.

Original poster
BlowDryRat · 31/10/2021 18:31

It's 100% his fault (not coming from the SE). There was an accident but he should have been past that point at least an hour before it happened if the kids were to have any hope of being here on time.

We have lots of sweets and the DCs' friends have saved them some too.

OP posts:
Breadandbutterpud · 31/10/2021 18:36

That is shit. I’m sorry.

Original poster
BlowDryRat · 31/10/2021 18:41

A friend has just suggested eggs instead of garlic but I feel like that would get me into trouble.

OP posts:
AlphabetStew · 31/10/2021 18:51

Yeah, garlic, eggs, a tomato, some ham, bit of grated cheese. Basically toss a whole omelette at him.

dancinfeet · 31/10/2021 19:23

This is just the sort of thing my ex used to do, can you do a part rescue by them dressing up tomorrow after school and celebrating day of the dead instead?

Alleycat02 · 31/10/2021 19:25

Next year absolutely don't send them to his at all if "his" weekend falls on Halloween, and remind him why if he complains. What a disappointment for them!

Original poster
BlowDryRat · 31/10/2021 19:37

It's DD's birthday tomorrow so no rescue possible unfortunately, but hopefully she'll be so excited about it that Halloween will soon be a distant memory. Poor DS on the other hand...

One year exH begged to have the DC for half term. He then made DD miss her own birthday party Angry All her little friends were there. I cried.

OP posts:
DismantledKing · 31/10/2021 19:38

Christ what a wanker he is. I’m not surprised that he’s your ex!

JollyAndBright · 31/10/2021 19:43

He’s a fuckwit indeed.

What about a Halloween themed scavenger hunt around your house for Halloween sweets to make up for no trick and treating?

Tokyotammy · 31/10/2021 19:48

He actually sounds quite calculating in sabotaging the happiness of others. Did he initiate the split or did you?

In future I'd play it safe and make sure he's not involved in any weekends which have important plans, so he can't balls in up accidentally on purpose. If the kids ask why, them remind them of what has happen in the past and best not to risk it.

Original poster
BlowDryRat · 31/10/2021 19:57

A scavenger hunt is a great idea. We could do that one evening during the week.

He was abusive in all sorts of ways so yes, he is calculating. Until the birthday party incident I hadn't thought he'd do it to the kids Sad He initiated the split because I wasn't being 'wifely' enough. He walked out so that I'd have time to realise how much he did for the family and appreciate him as he deserved. I took the opportunity to divorce his surprised arse Grin

OP posts:
TravelLost · 31/10/2021 20:13

@BlowDryRat

It's DD's birthday tomorrow so no rescue possible unfortunately, but hopefully she'll be so excited about it that Halloween will soon be a distant memory. Poor DS on the other hand...

One year exH begged to have the DC for half term. He then made DD miss her own birthday party Angry All her little friends were there. I cried.

Wow that is really bad!!!
TravelLost · 31/10/2021 20:15

So the bottom line is to never ever plan and activity for the dcs around a time when he could potentially wreck it.

Garlic sounds good to me and quite restrained tbh @BlowDryRat

TotallySuper · 31/10/2021 20:23

Be calculating back in future- tell them you need them back for an event at 2pm when it's actually at 5pm. Tell him DDs birthday party is X day when it's actually the day after etc. As long as your kids are young enough/savvy enough not to correct him. He sounds like a massive twat.

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