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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To wonder if doc was right

36 replies

Tevion28 · 31/10/2021 15:47

So I do have difficulty knowing if somebody has done wrong by me at times.
I am under the mental health team as I feel there is something wrong with me and possibly its been there since childhood.
I was thinking about autism and have asked for a referral to be assessed.
Recent conversation with my doctor I felt he was a little off with me asking what difference a diagnosis will make to me at 51 years of age how it will change my life etc. I tried to explain well it would be nice to know whats wrong and help me understand myself more and he just kept asking but what difference will that make to your life. I kept trying to explain that things don't come naturally to me and I have difficulty processing my thoughts and trying to explain that I'm finding it difficult to cope with everyday life to which he said lots of people have the same problem and I am coping I have xoped for 50 plus years. Do you think he was correct to speak to me like this as I felt like saying hut your not with me everyday to see what's occurring.

OP posts:

nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 31/10/2021 17:40

I think its a waste of NHS time and money tbh. The doctor is right, a diagnosis will not change anything for you or improve your life. You don't NEED to be diagnosed.

If you just want a diagnosis because it would be nice to know then you need to save up for a private diagnosis and waste your own money. I'm sorry if that sounds harsh but the NHS is on its knees and there is literally no benefit in diagnosing autistic adults. Children, yes, as it is needed to get them extra support in school etc but as an adult, you've lived your entire life without knowing so what is the necessity to know now?

Coronawireless · 31/10/2021 17:44

@nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut

I think its a waste of NHS time and money tbh. The doctor is right, a diagnosis will not change anything for you or improve your life. You don't NEED to be diagnosed.

I agree with this although I’d say it more gently. Unless a test would change your medical management it is unlikely to be prioritised due to financial considerations. I do understand why you might want to know though, but yes you will probably have to save up to find out.

meltingappointment · 31/10/2021 17:49

I think its a waste of NHS time and money tbh. The doctor is right, a diagnosis will not change anything for you or improve your life. You don't NEED to be diagnosed.

I diagnosis DID change my life. I very much needed my diagnosis. Who are you to tell someone it won't make a difference to their life

There is a huge fucking 'benefit' to the autistic adult.

Dismissing and minimising disabilities is an ugly trait.

meltingappointment · 31/10/2021 17:51

I wish I was articulate and able at this point. I have so much I want to say about the horrendous idea that autistic adults don't matter, but unfortunately I just can't do it. Let's hope someone better comes along who can explain it in simple terms. All I can really manage is fucking hell

nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 31/10/2021 18:34

Then what is the benefit? What actual material benefit is there? Of course they matter, no one is saying that they don't but what difference does it make to have it on paper that yes you are autistic?

Treatment is already being provided in the form of medication and you can self refer for therapy. OP is well past her school years so too late to make a difference there. What doors are opened by having an official diagnosis?

Maybe I'm just pissed off because I can't even get to see a psychiatrist even though I tried to kill myself 3 weeks ago and fully intend to try again. Have had no follow up at all. Yet fully functioning adults are taking up resources because 'it would just be nice to know.'

It just isn't a priority for the NHS unless you will get significant improvement from it and I think that is what her doctor was trying to say.

CorrBlimeyGG · 31/10/2021 18:41

@meltingappointment You've made your point well, and I agree with you. nothingcanhurtme seems to think that as she's having a difficult time, everyone else should too.

meltingappointment · 31/10/2021 18:43

I can't answer that. I'm sitting here and have been since you first suggested it was a waste of NHS time and money, wondering where we draw the line. Which disabilities/conditions do you approve of being diagnosed?

The comment about treatment already being provided, you do know that a staggering amount of autistic adults have been mismedicated for years? That therapy probably wont do much for an autistic patient if it's not targeted as such?

This idea that it wont make a difference because someone is no longer in school is absolute bullshit. Im so angry that people have the nerve to suggest it doesn't fucking matter. I'm even more pissed off that people seem to think it's acceptable to decide where NHS resources should be used. The irony is of OP is autistic it will likely save the NHS money and time in the long run given they are under the mental health team.

nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 31/10/2021 18:53

But what help is it? The fact that you can't answer is telling.

And no, I don't think anyone should have a hard time at all but she asked if her doctor was out of order and I don't think he was. He was pointing out that a diagnosis won't actually do any good and likely said this due to the strained resources. I am sharing my own experience just to illustrate exactly how strained that system is.

When they don't even have the capacity to treat life threatening mental health problems, diagnosing autism in a fully functioning adult is not going to be a priority.

CorrBlimeyGG · 31/10/2021 18:54

It does sound like you need further assessment OP, but whether assessment for autism is the correct path I don't know. Agitation in a clinical sense is more relevant to dementia, schizophrenia and other severe mental health conditions, but in a lay sense may cover presentations of neurodiversity.

Ask your GP about the autism diagnosis pathway, but also how you might get to see a psychiatrist under the CMHT. It will vary between areas, but in mine the autism pathway is entirely separate, so if it's not the issue, you'd then need to be actively referred back to the CMHT.

meltingappointment · 31/10/2021 18:57

But what help is it? The fact that you can't answer is telling.

The fact that I can't answer is autism.

HTH.

BlankTimes · 31/10/2021 20:57

But what help is it?

With a diagnosis, an adult can have reasonable adjustments made at work, which can be the difference between them being able to work or not. No employer will make reasonable adjustments without a medical diagnosis of autism.

Diagnosed autistic people are also able to be seen by medical professionals who will see the diagnosis on the screen before dealing with them, who will then understand their neurodiversity and know how to approach them to ensure they get the best outcome, be that for general things you'd see a GP or consultant for, or in acute medical care.

There are many comments on this thread about being diagnosed as an adult which may make you more aware of the importance of a diagnosis when it's been missed or deliberately not pursued by parents in childhood.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4387568-To-wonder-is-there-benefit-in-getting-a-label-for-my-DS?msgid=112086388

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