I’ve read a few posts recently, mostly about in laws and Christmas and there’s very much a split on MN, some defending GP’s and some not! As a soon to be FTM with very hands on family it did make me a feel very overwhelmed with the what do I do to keep my family happy but also ensure I get chance to do the things I want to do - after all they are my babies?
It got me thinking, where do we as FTM’s put the boundaries if any? We are learning our new role and being excited about our babies or children’s future.
Example for me is this Christmas, my mum is super involved still and means well but already wants to make my baby their Christmas day outfit and a stocking and fill it with gifts.
Now as a FTM I would quite like to chose and buy my babies first Christmas outfit, but reading some responses previously on here I need to be careful about taking too many firsts away from GP’s?! In relation to a stocking the baby will be what 6 weeks old?! It doesn’t need a stocking filled with stuff, but when they do, we’d like the stocking to be from Santa and keep any big gifts from family/ourselves etc. Again on those principals I would be depriving GP’s of doing something they want to do but surely us as parents have a say especially around anything that becomes traditional?
Not really an AIBU just interested to know how other mothers feel with new babies, and taking roles that were previously the GP’s such as hosting Xmas or family events etc and how your handling the shift?
Same from GP’s how do you feel handing over your roles to your children or SIL/DIL you’d previously had and how would you want it to be approached/handled without being put out?
Same for visiting new grandchildren? We don’t want any visitors straight away, and this has rubbed up GP’s noses already but for me it’s very important we bond as a family first, especially DH who essentially is just handed a newborn and told there’s your baby where we’ve grown it for 9 months and may already feel a connection etc.