Noisy eaters shouldn't go out in public

[Brieandcamembert]

I was sat us a nice country put earlier (i.e. small and cosy) and the man on the next table crunched his way through a packet of Tyrrell's very crunchy crisps. Bad enough but then picked at his teeth and generally slapped his mouth about for a good 10 minutes after. I had to leave.

This isn't the first time. I've been subjected to loud chewers in restaurants before now as well. Aibu to think that if you can't eat quietly and not also your mouth about then you shouldn't eat unless you are in a sealed room. Or box in your garden.

A former colleague of mine used to do a low level mmmmmmmm when chewing food and a bit of non nomming too. We used to eat at our desks and it drove me batty! I found it amusing at first because I thought she was having a laugh, but no, she did it every time she ate, I don't think she realised she was doing it.

All I have to say is, never go to a ramen shop in Japan!

@Topseyt

Did he scrunch his crisp packet up, blow his nose and fart at the same time?

lolz 😂

@Workinghardeveryday

Dp eats like a pig. Puts me off every meal. Chomps, slurps every mouthful, eats with mouth open and to top it off his jaw clicks with every chew. It’s gross.

My DH is getting like this too. He never used to be and its crept up during lockdown I reckon. No eating out, so he's lost the ability to do it nicely.

I make excuses now to eat lunch at a different time to him, so I don't have to sit in the same room. The worst is the cramming and wolfing... shoving more in before swallowing the first mouthful. Then refusing to wipe the detritus from around his mouth until he's eaten everything. If I hand him a tissue, he gets cross and tells me... 'for godsake, I haven't finished yet!'

Maybe it would be better if you didn’t go out in public.

Im craving a bag of s&v kettle chips now

How are you supposed to eat frigging crisps quietly?

You can’t. I was in the cinema once and the man behind me pulls out a large bag of kettle crisps... I may have turned around and yelled ‘can whoever brought in the bloody pony and bag of carrots please take them out!’

@Gubanc

How are you supposed to eat frigging crisps quietly?

Crisps, by their very nature. will always make a noise, but it is possible to mitigate this by the simple action of closing your mouth when you are eating them*.

Yes, there is still a noise but it isn't unnecessarily amplified.

*see also - poppadums

Or stick them in between two slices of buttered bread... mmmmm

Well you could say if you can't proofread your posts then you shouldn't start threads on internet forums...

I cannot listen to people who eat like that. Like listening to a cow sloshing around in the mud.
I would have to change seats, I couldn't sit and listen to that guy with his crisps.

How do you feel about noisy breathers OP ?

Or chatty children ?

Or the elderly who smack their lips together with every bloody sip of tea ? ( Or the ones who remove their false teeth to check what food has gotten trapped in them ??)

Or, my personal bugbear, people who cut their food on the plate so bloody forcefully that it makes a really hideous scraping/screeching sound ??

Slappy eaters drive me barmy. My dad is a noisy eater but had several teeth removed so I think it's down to that.

I annoy everyone in the family (including myself) as I have a very clicky jaw, I think it's from when I had a twin blocks brace as a teen. It clicks at the best of times but it's awful if I'm eating meat or something chewy, my jaw gets tired/achy too which I expect isn't great either.

It’s not great manners and I’d find it irritating but there’s not much you can do about it.
YANBU to say it’s irritating but the phrasing of your OP got my back up right away because I’ve been in restaurants with a family member with a serious brain injury and have had other diners complain that they shouldn’t be allowed eat in restaurants as they put other people off their food.
Not everyone is physically capable of eating quietly, but those of us who can should make an effort.